Bonds of Hercules (Villains of Lore, #2)(89)

“Uh—I said fuck.” I winked.

Neither of them smiled at the joke.

Tough crowd.

Augustus’s hand lingered on my thigh, his fingers hovering closer to my core. He was sending mixed messages.

Kharon leaned in. “When you’re sober, we’re going to dominate you so thoroughly … that you won’t remember your own name.”

“So much talk.” I clicked my tongue. “No action.”

Kharon’s smile was all teeth. “Don’t worry, darling. I will punish you. For hours.”

I grabbed at the edge of the table as the room started to spin. “Blah, blah, blah. All Karen does is make promises he can’t keep.”

He muttered something about sadomasochism and bondage.

Boring.

Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out my calculator—I clicked the side.

“Dear Diary,” I whispered into it. “Karen is saying weird, perverted things, but he refuses to have sex with me. I think he’s a creep. Also, I need to find a Spartan man who is willing to—”

Kharon snatched it out of my hand. “Dear Diary, if Alexis touches another man, I will disembowel him in front of her and—”

I grabbed it back. “Dear Diary, fine then. I will find a Spartan woman to have sex with. Also, I think—”

“Dear Diary,” Kharon yelled into the speaker as he tried to wrestle it out of my hands. “If Alexis touches anyone who is not me or Augustus, I will kill—”

“Dear Diary, don’t listen to that rat bastard! This is not his diary—”

“Dear Diary, it is now. I’m commandeering it because Alexis is the most infuriating, stubborn woman I’ve ever—”

Augustus snatched the calculator away. “You’re both cut off.”

I opened my mouth to retort, but a male siren came by with a tray and placed glasses on the table with a clank.

“Thanks, baby girl,” I said to him, then I threw back another shot of ambrosia.

The siren hurried away looking disturbed.

“Be careful. You don’t want to drink too much,” Augustus warned.

I wiggled my fingers in the air. “They’re antennas.”

Augustus pressed the back of his hand to my forehead like he was checking to see if I had a fever.

“I’m an anglerfish.” I pushed his hand away. “I’ve lured you both in with my glow. My blood—it yearns to poison you and … I’m hideous.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Kharon snapped.

Augustus hit his arm but tilted his head as he stared at me. “Do you have some type of … aquatic obsession? Weren’t you going on about a … whale, or something equally ridiculous, during the crucible?”

I scoffed. “Next time I have a personal realization, you will not hear about it.”

“Thank Kronos,” Kharon muttered.

“Shut up, Karen,” I said.

“Alexis, if you call me Karen one more time …” He stared down at me with frightening intensity, his alabaster features sculpted from ice. “I will throw this table at you.”

There was a long pause.

“Sure you will … Karen.”

His eye twitched like he was having an aneurysm, and I waited for him to make good on his promise.

I smirked. “I knew you wouldn’t do it.”

He grabbed the edge of the table and lifted slowly.

Augustus reached across me and slapped him. “Get control of yourself. What the heck are you doing?”

Kharon tried to shove him away and the two of them grappled across me.

I smacked my hands at them (yay, we’re fighting).

“Theoretically,” I said in the chaos. “If I was selling my kidney, how much would you give me for it?”

They stopped fighting and turned to me.

I kept hitting them (very fun).

“For the last time, you’re not selling your organs for money!” Kharon banged his fist on the table and the empty shot glasses fell over. “Alexis, what is actually wrong with you?”

My jaw dropped at his audacity. “Wow—I’m just trying to have a little financial independence in the middle of an apocalypse.”

“You’re wearing a three-hundred-million-dollar necklace.” Kharon pointed at my neck. “You’re financially independent.”

“Fine,” I said calmly. “I’ll sell you the necklace and my toe. How much do you want? Onetime offer.”

Kharon’s face turned red as I arched my brow and waited.

“No deal,” he spat, then muttered under his breath, “Obviously.”

“And you run a business?” I said. “More like into the ground.”

Augustus laughed, then hid his expression behind his hand as Kharon shot him a death glare.

He refused to talk to either of us the rest of the night.

Nyx was right.

Men should be seen, not heard.

I enjoyed his silence.





33


A SIREN’S PROMISE




ALEXIS: SGC DAY 2

As the last standing Cyclops’s wail echoed through the Dolomites Coliseum, I desperately wished I was still drunk.

The stadium silently watched the sands with horror. All chants had died out hours ago.