Camera Shy (Lessons in Love, #1)(134)

But first, it’s going to hurt. And that’s okay.

Leaving my bag in the car and only bringing in my purse, I trudge through the front door. I have no energy to immediately unpack like I normally do. “Hey, Fish Guy,” I call out.

“Hey, Fish Lady,” he calls back with a chuckle at our little inside joke. All kidding aside, I don’t know his real name. It’s been over two months…I can’t ask now. It’s too awkward.

I see my phone sitting on the kitchen counter next to a sealed white box with a note on top:

You’re beautiful. You’re worthy.

-Finn

P.S. I promise I didn’t look.





Not right now. I want to look, but I’m a little too fragile at the moment. I can’t take any more hits right now in case I don’t like what my boudoir photographs look like. It’s not until I grab a bottle of water from the fridge and head to my phone do I see the travesty in the sink.

Cherry…

Out of water, dead in a small dish.

I squeal in shock as I drop my bottle of water.

“What the fuck?” I squelch. My reaction causes the fish guy to stop tinkering with the living room tank and head in my direction. He dodges the spilled water with his sock-covered feet and scoops up the water bottle from the ground. “When did she die?”

I know she’s a fish…

But damn.

My head starts to pound as I hold back a fresh wave of tears that hits me. Goddammit. Treachery and tragedy are just fucking exhausting.

“I found her belly up when I got here an hour ago. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left her in the sink. I didn’t know you’d be here. But I don’t flush fish, it’s not good for plumbing or the ecosystem.”

“What’re you going to do with her?” I’m not going to be a child and suggest we have a service and proper burial…but if he offers, I will go put on a black T-shirt right now.

He raises his brows at me. “Chum.”

“Oh, God.” I pout. “Please don’t tell me that. I really liked this little fish.”

“You’re a fan of Cherry Barbs, huh?”

“Yeah, she used to be super spazzy, but she slowed down. The stripe along her belly, I’m assuming it was cancer. I just hope she went peacefully.”

Fish Guy bags Cherry and the dish up and sets her by his black supply bag with the blue stripe, which matches his uniform. “It’s not cancer. Some Cherry Barbs have those markings. They can even get translucent.”

“She didn’t have a stripe when I first got here,” I say. “It developed as she slowed down. I’m pretty sure she was sick.”

“What?” He looks at me like I’m crazy as he runs his hands through his curly hair. “No, it died because these are social fish. I keep telling Dex he needs to either get a separate tank or move some of these fish to make room for multiple Cherry Barbs because they like to live in clusters of their own. I’ve gone through three since you’ve been here. They are dying because of shock and isolation.”

There’s a brief knock at the front door before it opens and in walks the shirtless Adonis of a man that still takes my breath away after almost an entire summer of seeing his naked body.

“Hey, Queen, what are you doing home? I thought you were still in Mexico.” He preemptively spins his baseball cap around, because even though he’s sweaty and was clearly just on a run, I know exactly what’s on his mind. I’m smashed against his sweaty, hard abs in an instant and his lips find mine briefly. “Can a man get a call, for goodness’ sake?” He points to my phone on the counter. “I left it here for that reason.”

“I literally just got home.” I press my finger against his lips and lean away to look back at Fish Guy. “I’m sorry, can you finish what you were saying?”

“About the Cherry Barbs? They are school fish, so they need to—”

I hold up my hand. “No, no, the part where you said they are dying? What do you mean by they?”

He squints at me. “Fish Lady, I’ve replaced that Cherry Barb three times since you’ve been here. You didn’t notice? The twitchy one you’re talking about died weeks ago.”

I cover my mouth and gasp into my hand as I wiggle out of Finn’s arms.

He looks shocked at my downpour of tears. “Whoa, baby. Over a fish?”

I can’t stop myself. I openly sob. “Yes.” I point at Fish Guy. “That was so fucking sneaky. You can’t just replace people’s fish without telling them… That’s a lie. I thought one thing…and…it was all a fucking lie. It’s going behind someone’s back and changing their perception of reality and making them doubt their sanity. I thought I knew her…we were so close. I saw her every day…how did I not know?”

There’s an awkward lull as the two men in the room watch me weep over my dead fish friend. Only one of them realizes I’m not completely insane, and there’s obviously so much more behind my reaction to this news.

“Um…I brought another Cherry Barb. Do you want me to put it in the tank or… I mean, is this legitimately upsetting you? Or is this a lady time of the month thing?”

Finn’s expression fills with annoyance, and he glances at Fish Guy from the corner of his eyes. “Can you give us some privacy? Maybe you forgot something in your van. Go check,” Finn says in a gruff command. “Now, please.”