Change of Hart (Wells Ranch, #3)(54)
I can’t help it. My lips capture his again.
“That’s a lot,” I mumble against his mouth.
“I have nothing but time.” One more kiss, laced with relief, before he continues. “Are you in the mood for ice cream? I heard Lickety Split opened up shop for the summer at the start of the month.”
“I should head home to be with Mom.”
“Okay, sure, yeah.” No hiding the defeat in his eyes, and I realize my words came out wrong.
“Not because I don’t want to spend time with you. I just…”
“Have responsibilities that you’re totally fine managing on your own—I know. Let’s get you home.”
I tug him into me for one last languid kiss, walking him backward to the truck. And when we climb inside, I take the middle seat, letting the heat of our touching thighs warm my bones. For the entire hour’s drive to Wells Canyon, he clutches my hand with a grip tightened by fear.
Fear of losing each other. Fear that this moment is for today only.
* * *
—
It started with confusion when I walked in the door; Mom couldn’t understand why I was home from school. Doctors had told us to go along with whatever she believed to be true, so we told her summer break had just started, and she relaxed. Then she got annoyed with my dad for insisting she sit down and let him barbecue. But the straw that broke the camel’s back was my sister, Whit, showing up and loudly exclaiming that she had Mom’s new medic-alert bracelet.
I intercepted my nephew, Jonas, by the front door and told him I needed help with my computer, forcing him to follow me to my bedroom. To my fake surprise, my laptop was working perfectly fine. Jonas side-eyed me, opening his mouth to call me out for lying, when something smashed in the kitchen. Then Mom screamed at Whit for being a bitch, and Dad raised his voice in a way that made the entire house fall still.
Despite the commotion ending a few moments ago, Jonas’s hand is still hovering over the doorknob. “Are they okay out there?”
“I don’t know,” I admit. “Stay here for a second, okay, bud?”
He nods, stepping back from the door to let me brush past. And when I shut it softly behind me, leaving the ten-year-old as far away as possible from the adult bullshit he doesn’t deserve to be part of, I take a deep breath.
“Are you guys okay?” I fake a cheery voice, finding Whit sitting on a kitchen stool with her knees to her chest, wiping silent tears. I step up next to her and rub my hand over her back. “I told Jonas to stay in my room for a minute.”
Dad looks up from where he’s knelt on the floor, picking up large chunks of glass. “Mom went to bed. She just…”
“Got confused and scared.” I kneel across from him and pick up pieces of what seems to have been a salad bowl. “We know, Dad. If you want to go talk to her, I got this.”
He stands with a groan and shuffles down the hall, stopping by my room to say hi to Jonas. In silence, I pick up the remainder of the glass, then wipe up the microscopic pieces with a damp paper towel. Before long, I’m settling in next to Whit with a glass of malbec from Mom’s extensive collection. My sister slowly sips hers, furiously wiping the dampness from around her eyes, when we hear Jonas come strolling down the hallway. He flings his lanky body onto the couch, and even though he’s wearing headphones, it’s loud enough that we can hear the soundtrack to whatever game he’s playing on his handheld device.
“This is fucked up,” Whit says.
“So fucked up.” I take a long drink of the dry wine, letting it linger on my tongue.
“Thank you for coming home, even though I know you hate it here. Dad couldn’t manage on his own.”
Sucking my teeth, I nod. “I actually don’t mind being back. It’s been…healing, in a way.”
She raises an eyebrow.
“I had a change of heart.”
“Is that so?”
She’s not subscribing to my bullshit.
“Also, I kissed Denver today.” I whisper the secret into my stemless glass—a largely hollow space that echoes my words back to me.
“That explains it. That’s also the least surprising thing I’ve heard since I got here.” She swirls her glass around in her hand thoughtfully. “Be careful, though.”
“Cass warned me, too.”
“Because we don’t want to see you end up hurt again. You deserve the world, sis. If he’s willing to give you that, I support it. But make sure he’s all in before you fall headfirst.”
“I am. I’m taking things slow. It was just a kiss…that doesn’t mean anything.”
She looks at me dubiously, not believing the words coming out of my mouth any more than I am. There’s no such thing as just a kiss when it comes to me and him. Cass and Whit are the only people in the world who know I used to sneak him into my room at night. My sister’s the only person who saw me have a breakdown after losing him, and was subjected to hearing all the details. She knows how deep my feelings for him run to this day.
“Okay, girls and boy.” Dad enters the room, clapping his hands together and smiling broadly. “Who’s hungry? I made homemade hamburgers.”
We eat in a weird state of limbo, unsure whether we should be quiet and mindful of Mom—who’s apparently going to bed at seven p.m.—or be our typical boisterous selves in an effort to maintain some normalcy for Jonas. Opting to prevent another issue with Mom, we talk about nothing exciting, using slightly quieter voices than normal, and Whit leaves with Jonas the moment they finish their last bite of food.