For the Love of Friends(90)
“A lot of people saw it. And I didn’t have my name on it, so I didn’t think anyone would know it was me, but then people figured it out.”
“Well of course it was you! Who else is in five weddings at once?”
“Yeah. I didn’t think that through so well.”
“Why are you friends with those girls anyway? It doesn’t seem like you like them very much.”
“I do—well—normally. The weddings have kind of spun out of control.”
“I don’t understand you all with weddings. In my day, the mother planned everything. Your sisters were your bridesmaids and that was that.”
“Can you imagine if Mom planned Amy’s wedding?”
“Oh God no, your mother has terrible taste. She didn’t get that from me either.” I looked around and suppressed a grin. My grandmother still had brightly colored fruit-themed wallpaper from the seventies in her kitchen and had almost enough kitschy knickknacks to qualify as a hoarder.
She patted my hand on the table. “It’ll all blow over, dear. Nothing lasts forever. Well, except herpes.” My eyes widened in horror, but she didn’t notice. “Do you like the cake? It’s a new recipe.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
I still didn’t want to talk to Megan when I got home, but I knew it was time.
Before I pushed the button on my phone to call her, though, I turned to the next page of the notepad with my apology list and bulleted out some things I needed to say.
“Talk,” she said when I called.
“Hello to you too.”
“Seriously, Lily, what the hell?”
“Well,” I said haltingly. “You were the one who told me to write a book about my ridiculous life.”
“Okay. Call me back when you’re ready to be serious. I don’t have time for this right now.”
I sighed. “What do you want me to say?”
“Uh, that you’re sorry? That’d be a great start.”
“I’m sorry.” I paused. “But—”
“Everything before the ‘but’ is bullshit.”
I didn’t respond immediately. “I’m not ready to apologize without a ‘but’ yet.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“No. I need to say a few things before I can apologize. If you don’t want to listen, then we don’t have to talk yet.”
She was quiet so long I thought she might have hung up. “Fine. Talk.”
“Okay.” I picked up my list.
“Don’t tell me you made a list to talk to me.”
She knew me too well. “I did. I don’t want to mess up.”
“It’s me, Lily.”
“Yeah. I know. That’s why it’s important.” She didn’t respond. “Okay. I love you to death. I need to say that. I know you’re rolling your eyes right now, but I wanted to start with that. Number two: I didn’t actually think you’d mind the blog.”
“I—”
“Wait, please, let me finish, okay?” She stopped. “Number three: It really hurt my feelings when you said you wanted me to wear the minimizing bra to your wedding too. You’re my best friend, and I always thought you were the one person who loved me exactly as I was, and that sucked. A lot. Number four: I couldn’t believe you told me to re-dye my hair for your wedding. I don’t even want this stupid hair color, but why are you making me change how I look?” I took a deep breath.
“Can I talk now?”
“No. I have one more and it’s the big one.”
“Okay.”
“You killed me when you said I couldn’t date Alex.”
“I didn’t say you couldn’t—”
“You did though. You said I didn’t do relationships so I needed to not mess around with Tim’s friends. And that wasn’t fair. Because it wasn’t messing around with Alex. It was—well, it doesn’t matter now because he doesn’t want to be with me anymore. But it was real.”
She was quiet. “Now can I respond?”
“Yeah.”
“Look at the Alex thing from my point of view for a minute. The night of my engagement party, you—”
“I know.”
“And then Alex went around telling everyone that you and he—”
“I know that too.”
“And then you said Alex was saying that because Justin was trying to sleep with you. And it just looked like you were creating a lot of drama for no reason.”
“I think I’m done creating drama for a while.”
“I think that blog says otherwise.”
“I deleted it. It’s gone.”
“Nothing is ever gone. That Buzzfeed post is still a thing.”
“It’s Buzzfeed, Megs. Name one Buzzfeed thing you remember from before this. Other than a quiz about which type of French fry you are.”
Neither of us said anything for a long time. “You don’t have to wear the bra. Or change your hair,” she said finally.
“Well I do have to wear the bra now, because the dress won’t fit if I don’t and it’s too late to get it re-tailored. But thank you. And I already have the appointment to re-dye my hair.”