How to Ruin a Wedding(68)

I very nearly say, I’m feeling better, I’ll join for dinner. Even if he isn’t mentioning it—of course it’s not like him to say anything—I know this meeting will be hard. To have to sit around someone who is supposed to love you no matter what but you only see once a year. I know he’d like support. I want him to have it.

But I keep my mouth shut.

I don’t sleep the whole time he’s away, and at night, I shut my eyes, knowing he would peek into my room to see if I was okay. I hear his footsteps, feel his fingers as he brushes my hair from my face, then drops something weighted on my stomach.

When I hear the door click shut, I see he’s placed the heating pad back on my belly.

And I feel like the worst person in the world.





22.


I managed to get a couple of hours of sleep by the next morning. When I leave the room, I don’t hear a single sound. Anders isn’t in his room or anywhere else in the house. When I get to the kitchen, I read the tiny note he left for me.

Working at a coffee shop. Text me if you need anything.

I blow out a sigh of relief. For a little while, I can be completely by myself. Being around Anders is fun, easy, and that’s exactly why it’s better if he stays away for now. As soon as I think it’s best to keep some professional distance, he skips over the boundary—unbeknownst to him—and I risk it being erased before it’s already fully formed.

I text Valerie, asking if she needs any help with wedding planning, then call Taina for a catch-up, but surprisingly, it goes straight to voicemail.

In case Anders comes home, I get ready for the day, then head out back to the shelter to see if Dainese needs any help. When I get there, she’s delighted, as am I by her welcoming reaction.

Dainese says there’s nothing much to do today other than give the dogs lots of love, and lucky for them, I have so much to offer. I try to spread the love equally, and we open up the cages and let them all have fun, but I can’t help but gravitate to Sora, who keeps trying to play with the other dogs, then gets scared when they approach him too fast from behind.

Eventually, I sit with him against a wall, and we roll a small ball back and forth between us.

Dainese joins us. “Any news on the adoption?”

I shake my head. “I haven’t had the chance to talk to him. It’s been a little busy.”

“You should make the time,” she says, kneeling by Sora, giving him a stomach rub. “We’re getting a couple more dogs in, and I won’t be able to give Sora the attention he deserves.”

I narrow my eyes at her. “How dare you?”

She laughs. “You know how it is,” she says. “Willing to do anything for the dogs, including manipulating with guilt.”

“I respect that.”

“So,” Dainese says after a while, when the dogs all get tired and just lie in the middle of the floor, “what’s so special about Save a Paw?”

“Why?” I tease. “You want me to stay here with you? Already attached?”

She sticks her tongue out. “I got nosy and looked it up, and it’s great. I’m not going to dog out another shelter—”

“Ha, dog out.”

“But,” she continues, unimpressed, “it’s so big, how can you have the time to care for all of the animals?”

“You know, I think you may have forgotten since your sister and mom went away, but there is a thing called staff.”

“Ha ha,” she counters. “I’m just thinking about you specifically. I mean, you’re just visiting, but you fell in love with Sora instantly at the market, then came all the way here, did free labor, and you’re back again. You just feel like the kind of person who, when doing a job, wants to dedicate herself to it fully. Don’t you wish you had more time to be with all the dogs?”

I tilt my head back against the wall. “Well, sure. There’s never enough time in the day.”

“There is here.”

I laugh. My phone vibrates, so I pull it from my pocket. It’s Anders.

“On that note,” I say, pocketing the phone, “I should probably get back home.”

“To talk about adoption?”

“Yes.” I laugh, because even if I’m drawing lines between Anders and me, I’m willing to scribble them out for Sora.

“Good luck.” She salutes.

When I get back to Anders’s home, instantly something feels off. I sense it even before I open the door, and when I kick off my shoes and spot the designer heels beside Anders’s, it skyrockets into overdrive.

I consider turning my ass around and going straight back to Sora.

But if Anders brought a woman to the house—his house—I should see it. It would be beneficial to engrave that image in my head. I shouldn’t be having any romantic thoughts about Anders and vice versa.

Good. This is great.

I drag myself down the hallway, enter the living room, and my eyes widen so much I blink before they feel like they’ll slip from the sockets.

Anders is the first to stand when I enter, like his Lucy radar rang in his head.

Then, my sister gets up and holds out her arms. “My favorite person in the world!”

Shock fills me to the brim, replacing the jealousy I’m pretending was never there, but somehow I manage to storm over and grab her ear. “What are you doing here?”