Love Arranged (Lakefront Billionaires, #3)(105)

I pause, because shit. It feels like a far more nuanced question than I originally thought, so I hit her with a simple “I don’t know.”

I’m tired of that being my go-to response as of late. I used to be confident, but now I feel…

Lost.

Doctor Martin jots some more notes down. “Why don’t you think about it over the week and we pick back up with it next time?”

“Actually…could we meet twice a week? I need to work through my shit and fast.”

Her lips curl at the corners as she checks her calendar. “How does Friday at ten a.m. sound?”

I pull out my phone and add the session to mine. “I’ll see you then.”




I can’t believe what I’m seeing. The paper a campaign volunteer handed me must be a joke because how can the latest polls look like this?

I don’t want to believe it, but right there on the front page of today’s edition of the Wisteria Weekly newspaper is a picture of Trevor and me from the debate, along with a short tagline announcing how there was no real winner.

I couldn’t be happier about the polls included at the bottom of the front page because they’re the best numbers I’ve seen yet.

Sure, I may not be in the lead, but we are tied, which is all the encouragement my team needs to keep pushing. We have to get out there and knock on more doors, visit town halls and attend PTA meetings.

I need to increase my overall appearances and talk to more people, giving myself as many opportunities as possible to refute Trevor’s points from the debate.

“Holy shit.” I drop the paper and shut my eyes.

This is really happening.

I want to share the news with Lily, so I call her without thinking twice about it.

“Is everything okay?” she asks with zero inflection.

I miss the way she used to answer my calls. She never shielded her emotions like this, and I took that generosity for granted.

“Lorenzo?” There’s that same flat tone again, reminding me once more how much I hurt her.

I swallow the lump in my throat. “I’m tied in the polls.”

She is so quiet I can hear a set of pruning shears snapping stems in the background.

“This is better than any of us could’ve hoped,” I add when she says nothing.

“Yeah.”

“We’re still in this.”

She’s too quiet, and it’s all my fault.

“Lily?”

“Yeah.”

“Talk to me.”

“I have nothing to say except that I’m happy for you.”

“I’m happy for us.”

An awkward silence follows.

“Gotta go. A customer walked into the shop.” Lily hangs up without waiting for me to reply.

It’s for the best because I’m not sure what I would’ve said anyway. I could’ve called her out for lying about a customer since the signature Rose & Thorn bell didn’t ring in the background, but I doubt that would’ve gone over well. Or maybe I would’ve begged for her to put aside all the hurt I caused and give me five minutes.

To what? Pretend like you weren’t threatening to leave if you lost?

I wish I could take back all the doubt I placed in Lily’s mind. All the hurt.

But there is no time machine that can fix my problems.

Only hard work and therapy, which is a process in itself.

My high from the news comes crashing down around me, and I’m left with an uneasy feeling in my gut for the rest of the day. I should be excited by my new numbers, but I can’t shake the sense of dread taking root inside me.

You can fix this, I tell myself.

But what if you can’t? the anxious voice replies, always threatening what little hope I have.

If I can’t fix us, it won’t be for a lack of trying on my part. I’ll give her my all, and if that still isn’t good enough, then I’ll find a way to be more of whatever she needs.

Because Lily Mu?oz is mine, and I’ll stop at nothing until I become hers.





CHAPTER FORTY-NINE


Lily


Over the next three weeks after the debate, I keep to myself outside of planned outings with Lorenzo. At first I was nervous, but pretty much every time we go out, Lorenzo is quickly pulled into some kind of conversation with a townsperson, which is a relief.

If I could find a permanent third wheel to follow us everywhere, I would.

Lorenzo seems very accommodating lately. He even offered to return my Corolla—in fully operational condition—to which I told him no. Truth is I love my new SUV, and the thought of driving my old car is becoming progressively more difficult the longer it stays sitting in Lorenzo’s garage.

After I asked him if he could find a new owner for the car, Lorenzo surprised me with a custom keychain using the Toyota car badge—a memento I wasn’t emotionally prepared for but am grateful to have dangling from my new key fob.

Whether Lorenzo’s good mood is due to the recent polls or him attending therapy, I’m not entirely sure, but I make the most of it and ask if he wants to meet with the Wisteria Weekly reporter.

He says yes, so Nicole is going to meet us at Lorenzo’s place in an hour for the interview.

I’m in the middle of getting ready for it when my sister walks into my room and shuts the door. She takes a seat on my bed, and I turn away from my vanity so I can get a good look at her.