Love Song(7)
I’m so sorry, Blakey. Are you okay?
“What is it?” Isaac asks, an impatient note in his voice.
This time, I can’t ignore the fluttery sensation in my stomach. Or the chill that sweeps through my body. Slowly, I ease away from him.
“Babe?” he presses.
I click the link Gigi included in her first message. When it pops up, I don’t bother to hit Play.
The title is bad enough.
Leaked SEX Tape: Pats prospect and cheerleader CAUGHT in explicit viral video!
DAD CHAT
JOHN LOGAN
Hypothetically. If one were to “remove” the cheating potato who broke their daughter’s heart, how could one do it without leaving a trace? Asking for a friend.
DEAN DI LAURENTIS
Is the friend named John?
JOHN LOGAN
Yes.
JOHN TUCKER
I am not the friend.
My daughters are capable of murdering their own cheating exes. I’d confess and serve the jail time for them, though.
JOHN LOGAN
So if we wanted to disappear somebody, what’s the first step?
GARRETT GRAHAM
The logistics on this are tricky. Also against the law.
JOHN LOGAN
There’s gotta be a way to get rid of him without breaking any laws. Poison in his protein shakes?
GARRETT GRAHAM
You’d fuck up the dosages. We need something more efficient.
COLIN FITZGERALD
What if we send him to a remote cabin and “accidentally” lock him inside for a weekend? Give him some time to think about his bad decisions?
DEAN DI LAURENTIS
How are you my brother-in-law? That’s such a pussy idea.
COLIN FITZGERALD
I’m excusing myself from this conversation.
JOHN TUCKER
Just looked this up. It’s illegal to lock someone in a cabin.
DEAN DI LAURENTIS
To recap: murder = illegal. Forced confinement = illegal. Who would’ve thought.
JOHN LOGAN
Fine. New goal. MTAC.
JOHN TUCKER
??
DEAN DI LAURENTIS
Why are you like this
JAKE CONNELLY
MTAC?
GARRETT GRAHAM
Make the asshole cry.
JOHN LOGAN
I love you so much, man.
DEAN DI LAURENTIS
Send him a strongly worded letter.
GARRETT GRAHAM
I know the NFL commissioner. I could try to get his rookie contract canceled.
JAKE CONNELLY
That is diabolical, G.
JOHN LOGAN
Don’t call him G. He’s MY best friend.
JAKE CONNELLY
I’m excusing myself from this conversation.
Chapter 2
BLAKE
IT’S BEEN SIX WEEKS, AND I still haven’t cried.
My friends don’t think it’s normal. Gigi even called me a robot the other day, which was a joke, I know, but it got to me. When your boyfriend of nearly three years cheats on you, it’s customary to cry, isn’t it?
Historically, I’m not a big crier. Crying invites attention, and that’s the one thing I’ve shied away from for most of my life. But it’s not like I never cry. A sad movie with a lost puppy or a broken relationship? I cry like a baby. Watching Gigi walk down the aisle at her wedding? Sobs.
Ergo, I know I’m capable of tears.
So where the fuck are they?
The first few days following our breakup, when I realized my eyes were bone-dry and that wasn’t changing, I wondered if perhaps I was never actually in love with Isaac. But that doesn’t feel right. I did love him, and I’m grieving this loss. Every time I think about him, it feels like someone is stabbing my heart with a thousand knives.
Isaac cried. When I packed up all my stuff, he was in tears. Hysterical. He begged me to stay, promising it would never happen again.
But there’s no coming back from what he did. If it was just about a sex tape? Fine. I mean, not “fine.” I still wouldn’t have forgiven him—I hold a grudge till the day I die. But it might’ve been an easier pill to swallow. One crazy night, drank too much, gave in to temptation, and decided to film it like some sleazy amateur porn star.
But it wasn’t one night.
It was many, many nights.
For a year.
All those times he told me he was going out with the boys, when we were still living in Hastings near campus, he’d been hooking up with Heather the cheerleader. Apparently, they met when the Pats were still wooing Isaac during his junior year. He claims it didn’t mean anything, that there were zero emotions involved. It was just a “sexual thing.” As if that makes it better. Nothing about this is better.
And I still haven’t fucking cried.
For the second time in six weeks, I’m getting off another plane and taking another parental call, this time from my mom. I’ve been staying with them since I moved out, and although I love my parents dearly, I’m looking forward to not having someone ask me if I’m okay every five seconds.