Penelope in Retrograde: A Novel(27)

“You girls should come over tonight when you’re done with dinner. I’m doing a little moon ritual later, and with Mo and Jasper on safari, it’ll be awfully lonely, just Smith and me,” Fiona says. “Penny, you especially should come. I’ll make moon water.”

“Count me in,” I say.

The driver brings our bags, and we say our goodbyes for now. Smith whispers something in my ear about how good it is to see me again, and I can’t help but melt a little inside. I’ve dated a few guys at Princeton, but nothing even remotely serious. To be completely honest, only one made it to the second date, and that was mostly because he caught me trying to sneak out of his apartment early in the morning. It seemed rude not to accept his invitation for Starbucks. Otherwise, he would’ve definitely been a solid one-night stand.

It’s not like I’ve been pining away for Smith or anything. Princeton just seems to be full of all the wrong guys. Guys who already have the next ten years of their lives planned out. Guys who know exactly what companies they want to work for and who they have to impress to get there. To be honest, I think most of the dates I’ve gotten are because of who my father is. Never in my life have I had so many dinner conversations about what it’s like to be Carter Banks’s daughter.

“There are my girls!” Nana Rosie calls from the front door. “Hurry up, you two, so I can get a look at you both.”

Nana Rosie wraps me in her arms like a warm blanket on the coldest day. I miss this. I didn’t realize until now how much I crave physical touch and connection with people who care about me. The only person I have a consistent relationship with at school besides Phoebe is my tutor, and I think he might fire me as a client if I ask him to hold me.

“You smell like pie, Nana,” I say.

“And you smell like patchouli.” Nana runs her delicate fingers through my wild curls. “I take it you stopped to visit with Smith’s mother.”

“She invited us to a moon ritual.” Phoebe rolls her eyes.

“Really?” Nana Rosie hooks one arm with mine and the other with Phoebe’s. We cross the threshold together. “You know, I’m pretty sure I participated in a moon ritual once.”

“How was it?” I ask.

“Chilly. We were all naked, and if memory serves me, we were all the tiniest bit drunk.” Nana Rosie chuckles. “Or were we high? I distinctly remember a suspicious mushroom in my salad.”

“Sounds like an orgy, Nana,” I say.

“Do me a favor and bring up the moon ritual again at dinner, Penny.” Nana Rosie’s eyes glisten with mischief. “I’d like to remind your parents that while I may be old, I’m not ancient enough to ship off to a nursing home.”

“I don’t think telling them about your wild teenage years will help,” Phoebe says.

“Teenage years?” Nana Rosie shakes her head of tight gray curls. “Darling, that was last summer. That’s another reason why I can’t go to a home or move in with your parents. It’ll cramp my style.”

She guides us into the dining room, sharing a few other colorful details from her moon orgy that I highly doubt I will ever be able to erase from my memory. The moment Phoebe and I sit at the table across from each other, something feels off. Mom’s in her usual spot opposite the head of the table, with her usual glass of white wine in hand, but she doesn’t bother to get up to say hello or offer us each a hug.

“What can I get you both to drink, ladies?” Marie asks. The faint scent of cigarette smoke lingers on her uniform, further confirming the tension in the room.

“Club soda,” I say.

“Me too.” Phoebe adds, “Mom, where’s Dad?”

“In his study,” she replies. “Marie, after you get the girls their drinks, please bring out the first course.”

“Without Dad?” I blurt out. “You can’t start dinner without him. He’ll riot.”

She doesn’t even look at me, much less acknowledge that I’ve said anything. How the hell can she be pissed when we’ve only just gotten here?

“Marie, will you let Carter know that we’re starting dinner?” Mom asks. “Then bring out the first course exactly five minutes after you’ve alerted him.”

Alerted him? Is my father one of Pavlov’s dogs now?

I shoot a look at Phoebe across the table. She shrugs back at me. Maybe it’s Fiona charging her crystals in her front yard? She’s no longer sunning herself, from what I can see through the window, but her lawn chair is still there along with her crystal collection. My mother would definitely find that disturbing, but I doubt it’d be enough to make my father hide out in his study.

“Hey, Mom, do you have any plans tonight?” I wink across the table at Nana Rosie. “Because if you don’t, there’s a moon ritual happening—”

“Well, it’s true.” My father’s voice booms from across the house. “You didn’t want to believe me, Silvia, but it’s official.”

My mother’s eyes double in size. She looks straight at me like a deer watching one of its deer buddies standing in the road, just seconds away from being run over.

“What’s official? Is Dad pregnant?” I laugh nervously. “Did Maury Povich just confirm it?”

“Oh, Penelope.” Mom shakes her head. “For once, spare us the jokes.”