Queen of Chaos (Legacy of the Nine Realms, #5)(109)
“I’ll take that bath, Meat Suit.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Aria
The bath had cleared the remaining fog from my head. I’d spent the majority of it searching for a way to prevent Hecate from realizing Knox was incapacitated, if we attacked. She’d said she only had to remove one of us in order to win. It’s why she pitted us against one another. That meant she couldn’t know, or she’d fight harder.
I stared down at Knox’s face, tears rolling down my cheeks. It terrified me that he had not awoken from the land healing him. Knox wasn’t the type to go down, ever. I’d never even seen him hurt before, which was part of the reason I was freaking out. Knox didn’t get wounded, shit, he didn’t even complain about being tired or hungry. I’d never been down that long before. I was normally healed within a few hours, but he was heading into day eight. Pushing the silken, dark blond strands from his face, I exhaled a shuddered breath.
“Come on, Knox. I need you to fight for us. You’re in there, I know it. I’d feel it if you were gone. If our love was gone, I’d sense it,” I whispered through the tears burning my throat. “You are so much better at strategizing than I am. I’m more of a ‘burn it all down’ kind of girl.”
“He’s going to be okay, Aria,” Esme whispered, slowly stepping from the shadows. “I know you want to rush in and attack, but shouldn’t we wait?”
“For what, Esme?” I asked, turning toward her. “Should we wait for Hecate to come here? It’s one of the only strongholds still standing. If she reaches the gates, we won’t be able to defend it against the army of witches she’s gathering. Hecate thinks we’re weak, she’ll use it to her advantage.”
“So, we go and attack, and what? Rise from the ashes?” Esme’s tone was worried, her eyes beaming with it as well.
“I’m not planning to rise from any ashes. This time, I’m planning to make them,” I hissed as I let the bitterness on my tongue sharpen my words. “If I can’t have him, then I’ll burn this world until all that remains is the ashes of the love we once had. The love she destroyed, and stole from me. I’ll show her the flames of my anger, which is all that remains inside me.”
I hadn’t been a monster before, not entirely. I’d clung on to the optimistic, soft-hearted girl I’d entered the Nine Realms as. She had to die in order to become what the world needed. Knox had been right: the world hadn’t needed a hero. Heroes had too many rules to fight against villains and come out on top. In order to fight a monster, you had to become an even bigger monster.
“What about the others? Do you trust them enough to go into battle beside them?” Esme questioned as her lips tugged into a frown.
“We either learn to work together, or we watch this world burn. I can’t do this alone, Esme. Not anymore. I’ve been fighting alone for my entire life. I’m not the only one hurting here, either. It’s time to make the sheep into lions, and unleash their anger upon the one who fueled the flames. If we’re to win, then we can’t falter. We hit her hard, and we hit her fast with no fucking mercy offered. After this battle, we’ll have a choice to make. It’s no longer going to be a question of what would we do to end it.” Pushing my fingers through his hair, I felt the tears swimming in my eyes as I grieved the girl I’d been.
“Then what is the question?”
“What won’t we do to end it,” I whispered, even as I shoved the old me in to a nameless, unmarked grave within my soul.
“And if we end up dying?” Violet eyes brimmed with worry, even as she brought her thumb to her mouth, chewing the nail while waiting for my reply.
“Spoiler alert, Esme. In the end, everyone dies. Death is inevitable. If your number is called, there’s no escaping. This moment will define what comes next for this world. We can either rise and take everything back, or we can serve on our knees. I don’t know about you, but I don’t intend to bow before anyone. It’s time for Hecate to feel the same pain she’s inflicted upon the creatures of this world. This time, it’s personal for me.”
“We could die,” Esme blurted out. “I get that we have to die sometimes, but I’d rather it not be soon. If we die, she wins.”
“She’s already won, Esme. Without Knox, I don’t know if I can kill her. She said with one of us gone, she couldn’t be killed. Scylla mentioned Draghana Karnavious making a sacrifice for another savior. What if she figured it out before us, and that’s why she forced us to fight against each other? Hecate wanted us to fight so she didn’t have to, which meant she’s afraid. I think she’s still wounded. That’s why she went for the one thing Knox would bargain his soul for. It’s why she went after Lore. She knows he raised him, and that while he’s a brother, he’s also a child he raised from infancy.” It did raise the question of how Hecate had figured it out, but then if Knox had been privy to the truth, she’d more than likely plucked it from his mind.
“What happens if Knox—”
“Never wakes up?” I finished, when she’d hesitated to ask the question. “I don’t know, Esme. I know if he doesn’t wake up, I won’t only become the monster this world needs. I’ll become the one it seeks to put down after I’ve destroyed Hecate.”