Say a Little Prayer(26)

If maybe part of the reason Julia still wants to be my friend is because she thinks she has some cosmic duty to a higher power.

I shake the thought away and glare up at the ceiling, counting the cracks in the plaster until Ben reaches back and nudges my shoulder.

“Don’t look so glum,” he says. “Today’s supposed to be fun.”

I glance at him out of the corner of my eye. “You think getting dropped off at a Walmart in Rhyville, Kentucky, is fun?”

He nods eagerly. “It’s always nice to get out of camp for a bit. Plus, I really need new clothes for New York.”

“And you’re going to buy them from Walmart.”

“Don’t be elitist, Riley. There’s nothing wrong with a good department store.”

Julia laughs as the bus turns out of the parking lot. “Just tell her, Ben. She’ll find out eventually.”

I straighten, gaze flicking between the two of them. “Tell me what?”

Ben glances over both shoulders, but everyone’s too absorbed in their own conversations to care about ours. “Okay,” he says. “The truth is, we don’t actually go to Walmart. It’s a ruse.”

“A ruse.” I lift an eyebrow. “Who’s ‘we’?”

“Us,” he clarifies. “Me and Jules.”

“So where do you go?”

Ben’s gaze darts across the aisle again as he lowers his voice and whispers, “We found this really cool thrift store a few years ago. It’s right across the street from where the buses drop us off. That’s where we usually spend our free morning.”

Now that sounds more like Ben. The person it doesn’t sound like, however, is Julia. I turn to face her as best I can in the cramped seat. “You sneak away?”

Julia holds up both hands, face flushing ever so slightly. “They have really good deals, okay? Where did you think Hannah got her homecoming dress?”

“She told me she found it at Goodwill!”

Ben rolls his eyes. “Well, yeah. We can’t have just anybody finding this place.”

“Not that you’re just anybody,” Julia cuts in. “But it’s kind of a camp thing. I think you’ll really like it, though!”

I know she doesn’t mean anything by it, but the words still lodge themselves in my chest like tiny shards of glass. It’s kind of a camp thing.

Something else I’m not a part of, another crack in the space between us.

“Fine,” I say, smoothing over the bitter edge in my voice. “I get it. Still annoyed Hannah didn’t mention it on the phone just now, but I’ll live.”

“Just now?” Ben twists in his seat, voice shooting back up to its normal volume. “Is that who you were talking to? How is she?”

There’s a sharp squeak of static as one of the counselors taps the mic at the front of the bus. “Sit down, Benjamin.”

Several people giggle as Ben plops back in his seat. He waits until the counselor turns around before pressing his face into the crack next to our window. “How is she?” he asks again.

I bite back a grin. “Good. Busy. She has a bunch of private lessons this week.”

“Oh yeah.” Ben nods. “She was talking about that before we left. I don’t know why she’s so worried about the adagio.”

“Me either. I think she just wants her last show to be perfect so she can leave for California with a clean slate.”

Ben’s face falls, and I realize too late how final that sounds, how close we all are to the end of the year. The four of us have always known what’s coming. Ben’s spending the summer at his art camp in New York, Julia’s softball team starts practice at the end of May, and I want to find a job before senior year. The era of spending lazy, casual summers sprawled in each other’s backyards is already over, but the thought of Hannah moving to the opposite side of the country still doesn’t feel real.

Julia’s the one who breaks the silence, voice purposefully light as she looks between us. “Well, she’s not leaving yet,” she says. “We still have prom.”

Ben immediately perks up. “Right! Did you get your mom’s dress, Riley?”

I hesitate, rubbing my palms against the outside of my shorts. East Christian Academy doesn’t technically have a prom, just a highly supervised spring banquet where seniors are allowed exactly two songs to dance with the opposite-sex date of their choice. Hannah and I decided a while ago that Ben and Julia would come to our prom instead, but those original plans had also included Collin and Hannah’s group of senior friends. Greer was going to hire a professional photographer. Amanda’s mom had already booked the limo. I don’t think we’re welcome at either activity now.

I force the thought away. “I got the dress. I have to get it altered when we’re back home, but if I’m honest, I don’t think Hannah wants to come.”

“What?” Julia looks up. “Why not?”

“Have you seen Carrie the Musical?”

“I’ve seen Carrie the movie, like a normal person?”

“And I’ve seen the Carrie episode of Riverdale,” Ben says. “Which is basically the same thing.”

“First of all, it’s not,” I say. “But I don’t think she wants to watch her friends have the time of their lives without her.”