Shattered Gods (Dark Olympus, #10)(36)

My heart warms a little as I input the code and step inside. I’ve been here before, days ago during the meeting that was supposed to be a new beginning for us. In hindsight, that was incredibly naive of me. Hecate doesn’t want my vision of things. Maybe she never has.

I have a hard time believing that, though, as I walk through the rooms of the small house crouched between titan skyscrapers. Every single detail is carved into my memory even though this place didn’t exist in any true way when we lay on the grass after a long shift in the orchards, staring at the clouds overhead and dreaming of a future together.

Hecate thought I was dead and she still built it. That has to mean something. I…want it to mean something.

When I first hear footsteps, I’m half-convinced that I’m imagining things through the sheer force of the past in this place. But then Hecate herself walks through the door and stops short. Just like she did the last time we met in this place. Except, there’s no shock on her face. Only fury. “You have a lot of balls coming here after what you did.”

I refuse to feel guilt for the pain on her face. Refuse. “I did what was necessary. Peitho deserved to die, and if I didn’t plan on killing her son as well, I won’t lose sleep over it. He was a monster.”

“You stabbed Atalanta.”

I lose my battle with my emotions. Guilt prickles in my throat, uncomfortable and unexpected. “Ah. That.”

“Yes, that.” She mimics my tone perfectly, an eerie skill she’s always had. Back when we were simple workers in the countryside, she used to do impressions of our boss until I laughed so hard I couldn’t breathe. What innocent little fools we were.

I rotate slowly as she moves deeper into the room. There was a time when I’d stake my life on Hecate not wanting me dead. I don’t know if I can make that assumption any longer. Too many bridges have been burned in too short a time. “If it matters at all, she attacked me first.”

“Strangely enough, it doesn’t. She’s the one who needed medical attention. Not you.”

Medical attention. How did they manage that so swiftly? They must have called in a favor, but with whom? Most of their allies have turned their backs on Hecate, and even if they haven’t, they’re huddling behind the apparent safety of the secondary barrier. It won’t save them, but a little false hope is useful from time to time.

“She’s magnificent. Deadly and capable and clever enough to bypass all my people and escape with you.” I don’t mean to say it—or for it to be true—but the words fall between us all the same. I watch Hecate closely. “She’s also desperately in love with you.” Her mouth thins, but there’s something in her eyes, something deep and soft and caring. It stops me short. I stare. “You love her, too.”

“Yes. I do.” There’s something in her tone, in her expression, something I’ve only ever seen directed at me.

I’m a special kind of fool for thinking there might be an avenue to a future between the two of us. I have a burning ember in my chest with her name carved on it in bloody letters, one the burns away any chance of a true relationship with someone else. I truly believed she had the same for me. It…hurts.

Hecate stalks toward me, stopping just out of reach. “This ends now.”

“No, darling, it truly doesn’t.” I take no pleasure in the words. I haven’t taken pleasure in anything for a very long time. The game, perhaps, but we’re almost at its conclusion. Once Olympus falls, the future stretches out in a horrible, mundane gray blur. I don’t know how I’ll stand it, but that’s a problem for another day. “Too many dominoes have fallen. There’s no putting them back up. Olympus as you know it no longer exists. It never will again. It doesn’t matter if you kill me. The people will see it through.”

“Damn you, Circe.” She tugs at her braids. “If you’d just come back. Or sent word. I could have—”

I shake my head. “It wouldn’t have changed anything. Beyond that, your treasonous plan has hardly been bloodless. Whether through your path or mine, the old way of things was never going to survive.”

She clenches her jaw. “I won’t let you kill any more of my friends.”

“What friends, Hecate?” I motion around us at the empty house, testament to the ghosts we both share. “I’ll apologize again for Eros if it will make you feel better, but the fact remains that he would have put a bullet in your chest if he had to choose between you and his beloved wife’s family. Or maybe you mean Hades, who has closed the entire lower city to you. Or, oh yes, Helen turned Ares. Certainly she’ll let her personal feelings get in the way of her brother’s orders.” I shake my head. “You have no friends, Hecate. Except Atalanta. And me, if you’ll have me.”

“Stop.”

“I could be your friend again.” I know better than to make this offer. She doesn’t want it, even if our history means she still wants me. But it’s Hecate. If there’s a way forward for us, I mean to find it. She’ll see it as a manipulation, and maybe she’ll even be right, but I care for her. I never stopped. “More than friends, even.” I don’t step closer. She’s strung tight, ready to explode. There was a time when she never would have dreamed of hurting me; it’s long gone now. “I’ll even give you Atalanta once this is all over and she can no longer interfere.”