The Apple Tree (Sunday Morning, #2) (95)

My vision blurred behind my tears as I focused on my plate of half-eaten food. “And the only thing worse than feeling like my heart doesn’t matter or I’m wrong for feeling the way I do is the soul-crushing reality that he’s leaving soon. And I have nothing to ease the pain.” I slowly stood.

Sarah reached for my wrist. “Go with him,” she said.

“Sarah,” Dad warned.

I gave her a sad smile, pulling my hand from her hold to wipe the tears that broke free. “I can’t,” my voice broke. “He doesn’t want me.”

Sarah’s eyes instantly reddened. We had always shared each other’s pain.

I sniffed and looked at my parents. “Happy? He doesn’t want me to go with him. Do you feel redemption? Are you dying to say you told me so? Should we go around the table and let everyone share something stupid Eve has done to show how immature and naive I am?”

“Eve,” Mom said, pushing back in her chair.

“Don’t.” I shook my head. “I should have stayed in rehab. Nobody judged me there. They just”—I wiped more tears—“listened. Like God—He just listens. And He lets me live my life, love who I want, and learn lessons in my own way. All the while just … silently listening.” I sniffled and released a tiny laugh. “I see why you like to talk about Him so much. He’s pretty awesome. If only all fathers could love like that.” I headed toward the stairs, pressing the back of my hand to my nose and holding my breath to keep from letting them hear the sobs that were clawing to escape.





The tears subsided, and I fell asleep. I woke sandwiched between my sisters, Gabby at my back, and Sarah’s big blue eyes staring at me too close for comfort.

“Come to Nashville with us,” Sarah said. “The only way not to spend the rest of your life hating our parents is to leave and give everyone room to breathe.”

“You can’t leave me,” Gabby said, hugging my waist.

Sarah smirked at Gabby. “The world feels so small in Devil’s Head. Everything is magnified and suffocating. And freedom is magical. It’s nature’s drug.”

“And I’ll forget all about him?” I asked.

She frowned. “No. But if you stay here, all you’ll do is stare out that window and think of him, even when he’s no longer there. And you’ll feel guilty for missing him because our parents will never let you feel anything but guilty. They love us. They just have a painful way of showing it.”

“It’s like I’m not here,” Gabby said. “You can’t leave me.”

“Pfft. You’re the baby. Eve and I have paved the way through blood, sweat, and tears. As long as Dad never sees that you’ve been defacing your Bible, you’ll be fine. Stay a virgin until you marry the man of Dad’s dreams, and you’ll be golden.”

“Shut up.” Gabby laughed, and so did I.

“Do you have room for me?” I asked.

“Of course. We have a spare bedroom. We’ll help you find a job. You’re going to love Nashville.”

“Mom and Dad won’t be happy,” Gabby said.

“They’re never happy,” Sarah said.

“When?” I asked.

“We’re going to stay with Isaac’s parents over New Year’s, but after that, we can come back here and help you get packed and moved.”

I twisted my lips.

“You’re supposed to squeal and jump up and down. You’re moving out of Devil’s Head. Isn’t it your dream?”

My dream wasn’t a place. It was a person.





CHAPTER FORTY-ONE





ORCHESTRAL MANOEUVRES IN THE DARK - PRETTY IN PINK, “IF YOU LEAVE”





Kyle

There was a knock at the door, and Clifford barked as Josh ran to open it.

“It’s Eve!”

I felt that familiar pain in my chest—an intense longing for her.

Melinda broke my ability to trust in love. She crippled my intuition.

I was willing to risk my heart, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to risk Josh’s. One day, he would know that Melinda didn’t stay, and what if I took a chance on Eve, and she didn’t stay?

“Merry Christmas, my little munchkin.”

Just the sound of her voice made everything bleed. I stayed in the living room, taking a few extra seconds to find a breath and a smile that didn’t look as painful as it felt.

“This is my big sister, Sarah,” she said as I stood and ran a hand through my hair.

“Where’s your dad?” Gabby asked.

“In here.” Josh ran into the living room.

“Clifford, you’ve already gotten bigger on me.” Eve’s voice got closer.

My heart pounded a little harder.

“Hey, Mr. Collins.” Gabby smiled.

I grinned. “You can call me Kyle. I’m not teaching math today.”

“This is our sister, Sarah,” she said.

“Nice to meet you.” I offered my hand to the blonde with big blue eyes and a kind smile.

“You too.”

Eve and Clifford came around the corner, and my heart forgot for a few seconds that we were leaving, and Eve wouldn’t be in our lives anymore. All my heart knew was Eve made it beat stronger, and the room always got a little brighter with her in it.