The Break-Up Retreat(61)

I have reported my concerns in passing, but it is my hope that putting them to paper in an official manner might provoke a deeper reflection as to how we might proceed.

I have on at least three occasions (regarding patients ML, KR, and SW) observed how the Hastings Method has had a less than desirable outcome.

KR came to us after a long, drawn-out divorce, and it became clear rather quickly that not only had the seventeen-year marriage been abusive, but that KR had a long history of emotionally abusive relationships, likely in part stemming from undiagnosed C-PTSD. KR had sought out The Hastings Method in an attempt to find a new partner, and rejected the idea of conventional long-form therapy, something which left me deeply concerned for their well-being. The group therapy-setting seemed to aggravate KR’s symptoms rather than help them gain clarity or perspective, and at the end of the week I found myself deeply concerned that they might, upon leaving, once again seek out their former abuser.

ML came to us with what they considered a “failure” to find a partner. It became apparent that ML had a long history of cultural and religious trauma, and, furthermore, that these deep-seated beliefs were causing ML enormous psychological pain as they were conflicting with ML:s sexual orientation. In a more conventional therapeutic setting, ML would have had the opportunity to process their past experiences and explore their sexual orientation at a speed that felt comfortable, but as a result of the heightened pace of the Hastings Method, ML became re-traumatized by the rapid resurgence of painful memories, and left in what I considered to be a worse state than they arrived in.

SW came to us after a recent break-up, seeking assistance re-establishing the relationship in question. SW presented a narrative that fell apart upon examination, and when I attempted to push back, refused to listen and attempted—with some success-to turn the other patients against me. I grew worried enough that I deviated from the protocol and attempted to challenge the beliefs directly, resulting in what I would classify as a violent emotional outburst.

It is my belief that the Hastings Method, though rooted in sound science and having produced positive results for many of the patients who have undergone treatment, is not suited to all patients, especially not those who might have gone through abusive relationships, either as the abused or the abuser.

I believe that the patients should be screened before admittance to rule out any patients with Cluster B personality disorders, as the Hastings Method is at risk of worsening their destructive and self-destructive tendencies. Patients who fail the screening should, depending on severity, be referred to either out-patient or in-patient treatment options more in line with their specific needs.

I further believe that the relationship between patients and therapists needs to be better delineated. In two cases (patients ML and SW), patients appeared to both have developed strong parasocial bonds to you personally, with SW describing you as “the only person who could save her” (quoted from memory). Both ML and SW displayed significant anger at being treated by another psychologist, and described themselves as feeling alternatively “abandoned” and “cast aside” by you, despite never having previously met or interacted with you. It is my belief that this was not only harmful to the patients, but could potentially become dangerous in the future.

I take from this and other observations that the necessary boundaries are not in place to ensure proper emotional compartmentalization. This is always a challenge in an intimate treatment environment. I propose a strict rule of no contact between the primary psychologist and patients outside of therapeutic sessions, and I would further recommend that the Hastings Method and the Himlafall Clinic not be discussed on your or any other social media, as the parasocial relationships between the aforementioned patients and yourself all seem to have been rooted in interactions with your social media profiles. I believe the potential marketing value lost is a reasonable price to pay for the health and safety of our patients.

Furthermore, communication needs to be improved between caregivers. Written records need to be kept, organized, and cross-referenced. Three weeks ago (08/07–08/13) I received a patient (CL) and only discovered halfway through the week that this patient had already gone through the Himlafall treatment program, something which should have been communicated to me at the start of her treatment. Upon requesting her patient file, I found the file had been misplaced, which was why I had not been informed that CL had already gone through the program, something which greatly impacted my ability to evaluate the patient’s needs and design a treatment plan. I further discovered that one of the carers on staff had gone through the program at the same time as CL, resulting in more of the kind of blurring of boundaries described above. As such, I further propose a general ban on hiring former patients as staff members.

I believe the Hastings Method has great potential in treating a certain subset of patients, but the way it is currently being applied risks being harmful not only to the patients, but potentially to the caregivers as well. In order for the Himlafall Clinic to survive long-term, stringent protocols need to be put in place. Otherwise, I fear the consequences might be dire.

Doctor Nina Sundin





Chapter 33


I wake to the sound of rain smattering against the roof. The hollow, thrumming sound seems to be reverberating through the cabin, as though the lack of insulation in the walls is creating a drum for the heavens to play.

When I sit up, I feel my shoulder aching; and as I grimace, the cut on my cheek makes itself known.