The Life She Wanted: A Novel(33)

In the autumn and winter when the Van Luyens only came to Riverview on weekends, Willie helped around the estate. Someone had to keep an eye on it, and he never felt he could get away for any length of time.

“I don’t need a vacation, we live in one of the most beautiful spots in the Hudson Valley,” he countered. “And I wouldn’t know what to do with myself in a bigger house.”

“You like Harley. You told me so when the Enrights invited you to play tennis.”

“Harley is a fine young man,” Willie affirmed. “That doesn’t mean you should jump into something, even if he does have good intentions. Marriage isn’t worth anything without love.”

Willie hunched forward in the chair. He paused for a moment, as if he wasn’t sure he should continue.

“When your mother and I met, Laura was eighteen, and I was a couple of years older. She grew up on a farm and came to New York to be an artist’s model.

“I used to play at the tennis club in Central Park. One day Laura sat with some friends in the front row. I looked up from a serve into those blue eyes. I was so distracted I served the ball straight into my opponent’s racquet. It was the only match I lost all season.”

Pandora tried to imagine her mother, young and carefree in New York. She must have been so beautiful.

“After the match, we took a stroll through Central Park and got pizza at Lombardi’s. She came to all my matches, and I started winning. First the Davis Cup in Boston, then the US National Championship in Newport. She loved the excitement of being in the stands, the buzz of the applause.” He paused for a moment. “And I was in love with her.”

Her father told her the whole story of their marriage. Three months after the wedding, he was scheduled to play in France and England, and they planned to make the trip their honeymoon. But Laura got pregnant and was too sick to go. Two years later, when he advanced to the semifinals at Wimbledon, Pandora was a toddler, and there was no question of Laura joining him.

He lost at Wimbledon, and after that he quit the amateur circuit—there was no money in it. He took a position at the tennis club in New York, but Laura wasn’t happy.

She missed Willie being a celebrity, and she wasn’t fond of keeping house and being a mother. She got a job at a department store so she didn’t have to stay home, and Willie looked after Pandora between coaching sessions.

Then the war started, and Willie was injured in France. By the time he returned, Laura had had enough of the marriage and left.

“It wasn’t your fault that she left,” Pandora said urgently.

Her father looked so broken up; she couldn’t bear to see him hurt.

And there was no point in saying what she really felt—that Pandora was the reason that Laura left. That might hurt Willie even more. They had been a family, and Laura hadn’t felt they were worth staying for.

“The doctors wouldn’t let me leave the rehabilitation hospital, and the army wouldn’t discharge me,” Willie went on. “If Laura had truly been in love with me, she would have waited. That’s what I’m trying to say. When we got married, I thought my love for her was enough for both of us. You can only marry Harley if you both love each other; otherwise it won’t work.”

Pandora flung her arms around her father. It felt good to be talking to each other again. She felt closer to him than she ever had before.

“You could be worrying for nothing; Harley hasn’t kissed me yet. If he doesn’t, I promise I’ll get a job.” Tears sprung to her eyes, and she blinked them away. “Harley is special, but I’ve already got the best man in the world.”

Willie stood up. He returned the chair to the dressing table.

“I hope you’re right. At least you can learn from my mistakes.”





Virginia was already in Archie’s car when Pandora appeared downstairs. She looked summery in a floral dress with butterfly sleeves and a huge floppy hat.

“I’ve been waiting for ages,” Virginia chided. “You’re getting as bad at being on time as Archie. Don’t tell me that’s what happens when you fall for someone.”

“It has nothing to do with Harley,” Pandora protested.

“Of course it does. You were choosing what to wear,” Virginia said. “Tonight is the last night for Harley to declare his intentions.”

“That’s not why I’m going to the party,” Pandora said stubbornly. She didn’t want Virginia to think she expected anything from Harley. It was bad enough when Owen proposed to Lillian. She couldn’t face that humiliation again, even with her best friend.

“I have wonderful news.” Virginia waved away her comment. She patted the back seat. “Get in and I’ll tell you.”

Pandora threw her bag in the back and climbed into the car.

“I found a space for my poetry salons. It’s on Christopher Street, opposite the Greenwich Village Theater.”

Pandora’s eyes widened. Greenwich Village was as scandalous as Harlem. Bohemians lived there, along with actors and artists and vaudeville players. Virginia couldn’t host her salons there.

“Your mother would never allow it—and rightly so,” Pandora said, shocked. “It’s not the kind of place for a young woman to be alone.”

“Who says I’ll be alone?” Virginia said gaily. “The point of the salon is to be surrounded by people. Wolfgang is going to help me fix it up. I’ll put in heavy drapes so no one can see us from the street, and big sofas so people will be comfortable while they’re listening to poetry. And a bar of course, stocked with gin and whiskey.