The Roommate Pact(63)
He could practically see the gears working in her brain. Before she got carried away and created a website right here at the table, he asked another question.
“How about this one: When you die, what do you want to be remembered for?”
She gave him a little smile, tilting her head. “Graham. Did you do some soul-searching while you were bedbound?”
“It’s your fault for going to work and leaving me to my own devices.”
“I’m impressed. But that one’s even harder.” She searched the room for a moment, as if the other patrons would inspire her. “I have no idea. My work as a nurse, maybe? Healing people?”
“That’s a good one,” he said, but deep down he didn’t think that was it. Claire would be remembered for more than her job. People would remember her light and laughter, and the way the world just felt bigger and brighter when she was around.
He couldn’t seem to say the words out loud, though.
“Speaking of being a nurse, I won’t be doing that much longer.”
“Yeah? They finally got you transferred over in the system?”
“Yep. I’m officially credentialed as a nurse practitioner at the hospital.” She dropped her eyes and her smile faded as she moved her hands to her lap, a wrinkle between her brows.
“Hey,” he said, tapping her shoe with his foot. “What’s up?”
She lifted her gaze and shook her head a little. “I don’t know. I was really excited about the change—I mean, it’s why I did the work to become an NP in the first place—I want to have more independence and a broader range to help people. And gosh, I loved clinicals. I know it’s the right thing, but now that it’s actually happening... I’m a little nervous.”
“What are you nervous about?”
“I guess just thinking about being the one responsible for diagnosing and making the treatment plan...it’s a lot of responsibility. What if I miss something? What if someone gets hurt because I make a mistake?”
“That won’t happen.”
“It absolutely could happen. I’m human.”
Yeah, okay. “Fine, it could happen. But it probably won’t, because you’re damn good at what you do. You’re smart, you’re talented, and you listen to people. You care too much to skip over things and when you take care of someone, you make sure every angle is covered.” He put a hand to his chest. “I should know.”
The muscles in her forehead seemed to relax marginally.
“The fact that you’re worried about it means you’re going to be the best there is. You’re compassionate and those patients mean something to you. I know you won’t let them down. Plus, you’re not alone in it. You’ll still have doctors and all those nurses you work with, too, right? You’re a team. It’s not just on you, so slide some of that burden off your shoulders. I’m not running into a building on fire without my crew with me and a plan in place about how we’re gonna tackle it together. But even then, I know we’ll figure it out because we’ve trained for that moment. You have years of nursing experience under your belt, plus NP school on top of that. You’ve got all the tools you need to be the best one that hospital has ever seen. You’re ready, Claire.”
Cheeks flushed, she blinked at him for a moment, then dipped her chin. “Well.”
He cocked his head. “Well, what?”
“That was...really nice. Quite a pep talk.”
“It’s easy when I believe every word. You think I’d have let just anyone else fix this gorgeous face?”
She rolled her eyes, still smiling. “I barely had to do anything.”
“I see you didn’t refute the gorgeous part.”
“Obviously.”
He grinned, wanting to kiss her, but settled for sliding his calf along hers under the table.
She arched a brow but didn’t move her leg. “Anyway, what about you? What do you want to be remembered for?”
“Whether I want it to be or not, I figured mine would be for being adventurous. Or reckless. Could go either way.”
She huffed out a single laugh. “Yeah. You’ll be remembered for being an adrenaline junkie, no question.”
He thought he detected a hint of something off in her tone, but she gave him a warm smile and he decided to leave it be.
Tonight was ending up damn near perfect, and he didn’t plan on doing anything to mess it up.
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: Four letter words part 2
Claire,
I’m writing this from my phone while you sleep beside me. We’re at my parents’ house and I just had the best night of my life. I tried to show you when we got back how much you mean to me, and I hope you felt it. I hope you know. I’m sorry I couldn’t speak the words out loud, but I have to say them somewhere. So here goes:
You. Are. Extraordinary.
You’re an insanely beautiful, sassy, sometimes crass woman who takes no shit and isn’t afraid to ask for what she wants. You’ve experienced tragedy in the worst way and yet you emerged strong and resilient. You refused to let your past steal your ability to laugh.
Your laugh is the most incredible sound, did you know that?
You have the most unbelievable eyes. I’ve never seen a color like that. And when they flash with...what word did you say you feel when you’re with me? Hostility? That look wrecks me. I want to laugh, cry, and take you in my arms all at the same time. I lose all fucking control, Claire.