The Shippers(19)

“There’s our answer,” Ashley said then, circling something on her paper. “You got your first kiss on a day your father abandoned you. Was that the year you had pneumonia?” Ashley asked next, thinking back.

“Yes,” I said.

“From being in the rain?”

“I don’t think rain can give you a lung infection,” I said.

“But being left out in it for hours can stress your system,” Ashley pointed out.

I shrugged, like Fair enough.

“So Dad abandoned you and gave you pneumonia,” Ashley said, making a note.

Then I said, “But that kiss … made things better. That kiss gave me something nice to remember in the hospital, too. I thought about it while taking my breathing treatments. And while waiting for X-rays. And when they woke me at night to take a sample of fluid from my lungs. I just kept replaying it in my head.”

“Case closed,” Ashley said then, slapping her hands down on the table. “That’s plenty.”

“Plenty of what?” I asked.

“Plenty of intense emotions to react to.”

I hadn’t thought about that day in so long.

Ashley went on. “You really did imprint on your first kiss. Maybe that’s been your problem all along.”

It was certainly a new spin on things.

“Is this good or bad?” my mother asked.

“It’s always good to get to the root of your troubles,” Ashley said.

“Are you saying,” I said, just wanting to be clear, “that because I imprinted on one particular kiss at the age of ten, there is only one man on this earth I’ll ever be able to love?”

Ashley winked. “Let’s find out.”

“Because that seems like a pretty narrow set of options,” I went on. “In a world containing four billion men.”

“It’s just a theory,” Ashley said. “But it does seem very lucky that he’s coming to the wedding—single.”

“Why?”

“Because now you can test the theory out.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying you should sleep with Finn on the cruise.”

“Ashley!” I said, glancing over like she must’ve shocked Grandma Dodie.

But Grandma Dodie was just laughing.

I lowered my voice to a stage whisper anyway. “I’m not sleeping with my childhood crush at your wedding!”

“Fine,” Ashley said. “Don’t sleep with him. Just conquer him.”

“Conquer him?”

“Just make him fall in love with you,” she said with a shrug, like Simple.

“I have no idea how to make anyone do that—least of all my appallingly unrequited childhood crush.”

“We’ll figure it out. I’ll help you.”

“You’re going to be a little busy.”

“I’m never too busy for love.”

“Ashley,” I said. “Are we getting carried away here?”

“Think of it as an emotional reset,” Ashley said, getting serious. “A chance to heal old wounds, and reevaluate emotional scripts you wrote years ago, and come to a new understanding of the story of your life.” She paused. “But an epic one-night stand wouldn’t kill you, either.”

“Ashley!”

But Grandma Dodie started laughing again.

“This is impossible,” I protested. “Finn was never, ever interested in me,” I said. “Ever. At all.”

“You were a kid back then,” Ashley said. “Now you’ve grown up.” She looked me over. “We’re going to have to get your hair done. And your nails. And I will teach you how to walk in heels. Do you have any sexy outfits? Scratch that. We’ll raid my closet.” She squinted at me. “Should we do lash extensions?”

“I don’t—”

“It’s fine. Mascara will do.”

“You can’t turn your wedding cruise into some kind of Rube Goldberg love trap,” I said.

I was trying to make it sound ridiculous, but Ashley nodded, like Exactly! “He’s on the ship, and you’re on the ship. He’s newly divorced, and you’re newly—not married. This is a no-brainer. You just need to show him that you’re not a scrappy little pain-in-the-butt neighborhood kid spying on him from that oak tree anymore. He needs to understand that you’ve grown up into an irresistible, obsession-worthy love sorceress.”

This felt like a high bar.

Reading my face, Ashley said, “And maybe you need to understand that, too.”

“Nobody has time for any of that,” my mother interrupted. “We’ll be lucky to get these programs ready.”

“Mom’s right,” I said. “Everybody’s overwhelmed.”

But Ashley shook her head. “This is easy. I was already working to set up half the bridesmaids. Think of all the team activities we’ve already planned. What if JoJo and Finn just happen to get paired up for all of them? And just happen to get seated together at every single meal? That’s not more work—that’s just tiny changes to a spreadsheet.”

Ashley met my eyes. She knew I loved spreadsheets.

“That’s just,” she went on, pressing her advantage, “holding space for destiny.”