To Have and to Heist(11)
“Are you okay?” he asked.
My heart pounded a frantic beat. Seriously? Was I okay?
“Mmmph,” I mumbled with all the sarcasm and indignation I could muster and then I licked his hand, anticipating a reactive jerk of disgust that would free my mouth long enough to scream. Instead, I got a low chuckle that vibrated deep in his chest.
“If I take my hand away, do you promise to be quiet? You can’t help your friend if you get arrested, too.”
I nodded. He moved his hand. I drew in a breath of cool air and let out the energy of my panic-infused brain. “Am I okay? No, I am definitely not okay. My best friend is being arrested for something she didn’t do. I tried to rescue her and failed. My cheap rental apartment flooded, a naked man was mostly dead, I got fired, and now I have to live at home and work with Cristian, whose only goal in life is to get every woman he meets into bed. My parents are desperate to marry me off, and now I’ll be a sitting duck for a parade of losers who can’t find a woman on their own. I eat too much candy and I need to exercise more. I’m wet and cold and on the verge of bankruptcy and a stranger just dragged me into the bushes to do God knows what with me.”
“Anything else I should know?” His voice, calm and quiet, brought my racing pulse down a notch. What the hell was wrong with me? What had happened to my instinctive fight-or-flight response?
“No. That just about sums up the dumpster fire that is my life.”
“Take a breath,” he said.
“A breath?”
“Deep breathing helps reduce anxiety. It’s been proven in medical studies.”
“Do you know what else reduces anxiety?” I struggled against his firm hold—not just because I was desperate to get away from him but because I didn’t understand why he didn’t scare me. “Not being held captive in the bushes. Why don’t you let me go and see how chill I become?”
“I’m saving you from your misguided sense of loyalty and total disregard for your own well-being. The police will be coming back here any moment now, looking for an accomplice.” He tightened his hold, and my stupid brain interpreted his warmth and firm grip as “safety and security” instead of “you’re going to die.”
“Misguided?” I glared over my shoulder, but I couldn’t make out his face in the darkness. “That’s my best friend in there. She’s already gone through more pain than most people experience in a lifetime. Now she’s scared and alone and going to jail, and I’m trapped in the bushes with you.”
“They aren’t bushes,” he said. “The shrub to your left is ninebark. It has a beautiful leaf color, a cinnamon inner bark, and blooms pink in June. It’s best kept trimmed to about five feet, but no one has looked after this garden, which is why this one is over eight feet tall. On your right, you’ve got arrowwood. You might know it as fragrant viburnum. It adds structure to a garden and a wonderful spicy fragrance to your space. Again, lack of pruning is why it has overgrown.”
“Are you a gardener? Is that why you were hiding back here?”
“Gardening is just a hobby,” he said.
“What’s your real job? Kidnapping innocent women? Skulking behind museums?” Something niggled at the back of my brain, and I sucked in a sharp breath. “Or are you the thief?”
“I’ll admit I was attempting to acquire a certain item from the museum, but someone got there before me.” He stepped back, deeper into the bushes, pulling me with him. I felt him moving, adjusting my position, his hips pressed firmly against my ass.
My muscles tightened, ready to run if it turned out I’d made a serious error in judgment. “What’s going on? I watch a lot of crime and mystery shows, so I know that the deeper people are dragged into a forest by a stranger, the lower the chance that they’ll make it out alive.”
“You were standing on the hellebore,” he said. “It’s a workhorse in a small garden, but the stems break easily. My favorite pairing is hellebore planted near brunnera and fern for a trifecta of shady textural goodness.”
Not what I expected to hear from a stranger in the dark.
“Are you for real? This place is about to be crawling with police. You’re a kidnapper and self-professed would-be thief, and you’re worried about the plants?”
“You don’t like plants?” The disappointment in his voice was unmistakable.
“Sure I like plants. I’d take a house with a garden over an apartment in a high-rise any day, but that’s not the point. You need to get your priorities straight.”
“What’s more important than plants? They give us food, fiber, shelter, medicine, and fuel. The basic food for all organisms is produced by green plants. In the process of food production, oxygen is released into the air we breathe, and as I’m sure you know oxygen is essential to life.”
Oxygen was also essential for lowering anxiety, or so my therapist said. Since I didn’t seem to be in any imminent danger, I tried my 5-5-5 breathing technique, then 4-7-8, and then I chose a calming focus and tried mindful breathing.
“Are you hyperventilating?” he asked. “Or trying to fall asleep?”
“I’m trying to use the plant oxygen to calm down so I can think. And by the way, people are more important than plants. Specifically, the people you love.”