To Have and to Heist(90)
“Who’s going to officiate at the wedding?” Mr. Angelini didn’t seem shocked or surprised to hear that someone had tried to poison one of God’s representatives on Earth in his home and then disposed of the evidence, but then I suppose if you’re used to chopping off hands and slitting throats on a daily basis, a little poisoning is pretty tame.
“One of the members of my team used to be a priest,” I said. “He was released from his sacred duties some time ago and now handles elephants for us, but he is also an ordained minister and can perform the ceremony. If you like the priest look, he still has his robes, but he can’t do a Catholic ceremony. I think he’s afraid God might smite him or hit him with a bolt of lightning or send him to a bad place.”
Mr. Angelini blew a smoke ring in my face. “I don’t care how he does it so long as it’s legally binding. As I told you before, you don’t want to disappoint me.”
“Of course.” I stifled a cough as the acrid smoke filled my lungs. “The ceremony will go ahead as planned.”
After stopping by the bathroom to throw up my breakfast after my unsettling meeting with Mr. Angelini, I went to see Bella to explain what had happened. She was having a few quiet moments alone in her room between hair and makeup.
“Poisoned?” Bella gasped and staggered back, clutching her chest, her reaction as dramatic as her father’s had been understated. “We should cancel the wedding. Out of respect.”
“I’ve come up with a solution,” I said. “Gage used to be a priest and in four hours he will be an ordained minister. Your dad wants to see his certificate, but if we can get you married before it arrives, your marriage will technically be invalid. You won’t even need to get an annulment for lack of consummation. I can give the certificate to your father after the ceremony, and by the time he finds out the marriage was invalid, you’ll be long gone. Chloe will be able to fake some kind of computer glitch that will absolve us of blame. I hate to say it, because I feel terrible for the priest, but this makes things even easier for you. Now you won’t even be legally married. No trying to get an annulment while you’re in hiding. You’ll be free.”
Far from being excited about the plan, Bella sighed. “Do you have to solve every damn problem?”
“I thought you’d be pleased.” I fought back my disappointment. “It’s one less thing for you to worry about. If we don’t have the wedding, how will you escape? Everyone is distracted. The outdoor security system is off. The security guards are busy watching the guests. This is still your best chance to get away.”
“No wedding would have made me more pleased.” She tightened the belt on her robe and walked over to the window. “If by some chance the marriage turns out to be valid, Mario will never stop hunting for me. Your minister cannot be ordained when we say ‘I do.’？” She turned to face me, her eyes cold and hard. “Do you understand?”
“Of course.” I didn’t appreciate her condescending attitude after I’d come up with such an amazing solution to the problem of the poisoned priest on short notice. I’d also arranged to help her escape, putting my crew at risk. A simple thank-you would have been nice. A “you’re incredible” would have been even better. I chalked it up to wedding nerves.
After I checked the kitchen again for the missing soup pot, I grabbed Chloe, Jack, and Gage for a huddle.
“Someone poisoned the priest. Bella isn’t the only one who doesn’t want this wedding to go ahead. Maybe it’s another Mafia family who would be threatened by the merger.”
“Maybe it was just bad soup,” Gage said.
“The hospital is certain it was poison. They identified the drug and said it cannot accidentally find its way into soup.”
“You gotta have balls to poison a priest,” Gage said. “We’ve got a stone-cold killer in the house.”
“I don’t care who is in the house so long as the wedding goes ahead. We’ve all got jobs to do. Keep your eyes open and don’t eat any soup.”
“You are so fucking sexy when you’re bossing people around,” Jack said, nuzzling my neck as he pulled me behind an azalea bush. “Have you ever done it outdoors?”
“Didn’t last night count?” We’d sneaked up to the roof of Jack’s hotel for a little loving beneath the stars.
“There were no trees or bushes, no flowers or grass. I want you naked in the hellebore moaning my name.” He pulled me into his chest, squeezing me so hard, my breath came out in a huff.
“Jack, you know how much I love sexy times with you. But I’ve got a minister to ordain, a wedding to run, a heist to plan, a necklace to steal, and a bride to kidnap. I can’t juggle any more balls.”
* * *
◆ ◆ ◆
?The first guest arrived five minutes after we’d finished setting up for the ceremony. I alerted the crew and then took a short breather with Chloe.
“If not for us, she’d be marching to her doom,” I said. “Did you see the groom? In that tux, with his hair slicked down, he looks like every movie mafioso. He’s got the scowl, the swagger, the arrogance, the cruel slash of a mouth, the hard beady eyes, and I’m pretty sure he’s packing.”
“I just remember him cowering behind his bodyguard after we beat him up,” she said. “But if he gives us any trouble today, Gage will deal with him. I already ruined one pair of heels on his sorry ass; I’m not ruining another.”