Under the Same Stars(70)

Do we even like Shelly? Zach texted.

No, Simon confirmed.

“You know it was a bigger group than that,” Marco said. “You saw the photos.”

“No, I saw the photo,” I told him with a bitter taste in my mouth. “What were you whispering in her ear, pray tell?”

Marco was silent for a moment, then said, “You sound incredibly jealous.”

The corners of my eyes stung, threatening tears.

Marco sighed. “Mads, I thought about you all summer. I dreamt about you and only you.”

A wonderstruck wave went through my veins. “You did?”

“Yes—god, yes.” He nodded. “All summer long, but you made it clear you weren’t interested in being more than…” He trailed off to find the right word. “Well, whatever we were.”

Whatever we were.

Friends really didn’t cover it.

“I spent pretty much every day here,” he continued. “But you always found a way to bring up Connor—”

“He’s my best friend!” I argued. “It’s not my fault that most of my anecdotes involve him.”

“And you were going on all these dates.”

“You know, it’s interesting you bring those up,” I said. “Because while I thought it was a star-aligned coincidence that you appeared out of nowhere, Katie told me otherwise. She said she told you to spy on me.”

Marco raised an eyebrow. “Spy on you?” He shook his head. “Mads, no.”

“Oh, please!” My hands went to my hips. “The first time I met Davis? For coffee? You were at Crescent Moon.”

“Yeah, because I study there,” he said. “Religiously.”

But you walked me back to my car afterward, I wanted to say.

“You were also at Davis’s pre-prom dinner at Ember & Ash,” I added. “Not at the table next to us, but you were there.”

“Again, entirely coincidental,” Marco said. “I go to school in Princeton, and Carina runs that restaurant—hell, my family owns that restaurant. Of course I eat there!”

“Stop lying!” I shouted. “I go ice-skating with Chad? You bring your cousins skating. Jacob invites me to the movies? You and Tim ditch Simon to see whatever.” My heart hammered. “Always the same place, same-ish time. And the only person who knew those details was Katie.” I swallowed hard. “How do you even know Katie, anyway?”

Marco adjusted his glasses, the ones I loved so much. “She used to babysit me,” he admitted. “When Carina started waitressing in high school, Katie babysat me a couple nights a week.”

Hold up, I thought. Katie? A babysitter?

I couldn’t see it.

“And you never thought to mention that?” I asked. “Even as a fun fact?”

Marco shrugged. “I was more saving it for a trivia question.” He smiled a little. “Plus, I can’t exactly give her a ringing endorsement. She never let me eat junk food.”

My hands balled into fists. “Get serious.”

“Only if you get serious. Katie—”

“She’s laughing at me,” I said. “You being Katie’s eyes and ears…” I shook my head. “She’s laughing at me, and even if they do want to help, so are the other bridesmaids.” I turned away to wipe off some escaped tears.

“I’m not laughing,” Marco murmured.

“Maybe not,” I said. “But you don’t trust me. You don’t trust me to make my own decisions.”

“What are you talking about?” he asked. “You’ve made your own decisions with these guys, and they’ve been the right ones!”

“No, I haven’t,” I said, looking him dead in the eye. “Not all of them have been right.”

Marco tried to take my arm, but I dodged him. “Mads, wait!” he called when I started back toward the house.

“Go fuck yourself, Marco!” I called back, and then sobbed myself to sleep that night, knowing he wouldn’t have to.

He had Shelly.





Autumn





Twenty


September was, by far, my favorite month of the year. There was just something about it I especially loved. Maybe it was the fact that the weather was still summery but the air was crisper when I woke up and met Connor to run through the Christmas tree farm every morning. Maybe it was because high school field hockey season somehow felt more relaxed than my club team. Or maybe it was because of my birthday.

I turned eighteen on September 10. My parents surprised me by renting out a private room at an Italian place I loved; when we’d walked in, Connor, Natalie, Davis, a couple of my teammates, and even Samira popped up from behind the table and shouted, “Surprise!”

It had been a great night, even though Austin hadn’t been there. He was battling bronchitis, which we all suspected he’d caught from one of his patients. Katie was, of course, also invited, but she didn’t come. I wasn’t going to lie—it hurt, but I couldn’t say I was heartbroken. We hadn’t spoken much since I ditched everyone at the Finger Lakes last month. “It was really fun!” I’d told Austin when he’d asked about the weekend, and Katie must’ve corroborated my version of the truth.