I shudder and lower his zipper. I pull his boxers and pants down just far enough to free his cock. It bobs, hardening by the second, at eye level. I reach out and slide my hand down his shaft.
He releases my jaw and winds his fingers in my hair. My control is nonexistent… in that Greyson has me right where he wants me. A fly in his web. He moves my head forward, and I open my mouth wide. He tastes familiar, but he doesn’t give me a moment to adjust. His hips rock forward, and the tip hits the back of my throat—then slides farther down.
I gag around him, choking when my breath is cut off.
I forgot he enjoys that aspect. He likes to watch my face redden, my eyes fill with tears. He pulls out, and I suck in a deep breath through my nose before I lose the ability again. I hold his thighs as he fucks my face, one hand on the back of my head and the other braced on the wall behind me.
Someone gasps behind him. Fire erupts through me, shame and embarrassment turning my whole body into an inferno.
We’re caught.
“Get out of here,” Greyson growls over his shoulder.
I don’t know if they listen. I keep my eyes half-closed until he jerks my head back. I lift my gaze to his and hold it. It’s blurry through my tears. My nose runs, too, and I can’t do anything about the saliva.
He moves faster, taking and taking and taking.
“You. Don’t. Leave. Me.”
I hope my eyes translate my thoughts.
Get fucked, Greyson.
His fingers tighten in my hair. The pinpricks of pain have my jaw tensing. My teeth skim his cock, and he shudders. And then he comes. He groans and fills my throat so deep, I don’t have a choice but to swallow. His head bows forward, his eyes drinking in my face. I can’t breathe like this, and an alarm blares through my system. The need to get free. To take in oxygen.
“How would it feel to die like this?” he asks, reading my mind. “Suffocating on my cock.”
He waits another second. Then he pulls out, and I fall backward. Except, now isn’t the time for pity or staying huddled in a mess of tears on the floor. I stand quickly, wiping my face with the bottom of my shirt. The hate comes next—that he feels free to use me like this.
You’re nothing special. Paris said as much.
So why have I been plucked out of the crowd? Because of one night?
“Would you have done this to Paris if I didn’t come along?”
He lifts one shoulder. I don’t think his gaze has left me once, and I need to know what he sees in me.
“No. She’s the kind of slut who begs for my cock. And if not mine, Knox or Miles or anyone who knows how to play a sport. You’re my goal, Violent. You’re the one who doesn’t let anyone in. Even your bastard ex-boyfriend never got to see the real you.” He runs his finger under my eye. “The real you craves this. The real you is fucked up in the head, just like me. Isn’t that right?”
I jerk away. Even if he’s right, I’m never going to admit it.
“Even if you hadn’t come along, as you said…” He gets even closer. “Even then, we were destined to find each other.”
“All we do is hurt each other.” I incline my chin and turn my back on him. I need to retrieve my bag and get away from here.
Get away from him—as if that’s even a possibility.
He lets me go for now, and once I have my things, I hurry away from campus. He’s got evening hockey practice coming up soon. That may be the only thing stopping him from following me.
My pointe shoes are burning a hole in my bag, and I’m itching to put my muscles to good use. Instead, my feet lead me to the sidewalk outside Greyson’s house.
I check my watch. It should be empty.
Against my better judgment, I walk right up to the front door and try the handle.
It opens easily under my hand.
They don’t lock it? They probably think they’re invincible—if Knox hadn’t already infused that in his starters, I would’ve been sure Greyson brought it with him. The aura that accompanies people who are used to getting their way.
I hesitate in the doorway and listen. They left the lights on. It smells faintly of booze in here, the aftermath of too many celebrations. When only silence greets me, I close the door and hurry to the stairs.
Greyson’s door is closed but not locked either. Not that I would’ve anticipated it… that would’ve thrown a wrench in my plans.
His room is as neat as I remember, if a little more lived-in. There’s a hamper in the corner that’s overflowing with clothes, but that’s the only sign that he might be losing it.
My fault?
I run my finger along the edge of his desk and rifle through his papers. There’s a printed copy of the research paper due for one of our shared classes, environmental economics. I am actually liking that class a lot more, now that I’m paying better attention.
Turns out, I don’t have much of a social life when I take away dance.
I fold up the stapled pages and tuck it in my jacket pocket. Then I head for the true prize.
It sits on the bookcase, slightly pulled out like he’s recently looked at it. The photo album he practically begged me not to touch.
This is how I strike back and get Greyson to abandon me once and for all.
I almost feel guilty zipping my jacket around it, keeping it hidden and protected from the elements. It could’ve gone in my bag, still looped over my shoulder, or I could’ve kept it tucked in my arms. But part of me wants to treat it as well as Greyson has.
The book is thin and easy to conceal. I can examine it later, but for now I just hurry back to the street. My skin prickles, and I glance around. The street is dark, with illuminated circles from the spread-apart street lamps.
I can’t pinpoint why I feel the hair raise on the back of my neck, so I bolt. I shouldn’t run—I’m still trying to get my leg back into better condition, after all—but I can’t stop myself. I fly along the sidewalk for a block, then another. The book rubs against my skin. My bag bangs my hip with every step.
Finally, I slow and take a breath.
Back safe in my apartment, I pull it out. Leather-bound, with Devereux stamped into it. I want to know more about where it came from and who chose the photos that fill it. I only saw a few, and I have the urge to scan the rest of them.
I can’t.
I search the apartment for a hiding place and eventually find one.
Once it’s safe, I go back out. To the studio.
To dance my adrenaline away… and prepare for Greyson’s next move.
38
GREYSON
Violet, Violet, Violet.
I can smell her sweet, floral scent in my room, like she rubbed herself along my walls, my sheets. There’s no imprint. No sign of her at all except for the smell. Something I don’t think I could concoct in my imagination.
I sit on my bed and inhale again, not wanting to exhale.
My father calls me. I consider sending it to voicemail, but the last time I did that, he showed up at my game.
Him. At a game.
I haven’t seen him witness me play in years, let alone speak to me after the fact. It probably has something to do with our clashing reputations. Can a beloved senator really have a bloodthirsty hockey player for a son?
Since our next game is at home, I don’t want to risk that. Coach Roake acted like he walked on water, and I was once again reminded of the complex power my father holds. It goes far beyond his domain of New York.