“I understand, Alexander. I won’t bother you needlessly. I’m grateful for what you’re offering me. I’ll play the role of doting wife and daughter-in-law in public, and I’ll respect your boundaries. I promise you.”
He nods and looks at me, his gaze searching, as though he’s trying to make sure I mean what I say, that I won’t bother him with useless expectations. What he sees in my eyes seems to please him, because he nods in satisfaction.
He pauses and stares at me for a few seconds. “It’s quite likely that my mother is already aware that we decided to proceed with our marriage, and she’ll have taken your image in her own hands. You’re a Kennedy now, and you’ll need to look like one. We won’t announce our marriage for the time being. Instead, we’re going to stage an entire relationship. We’ll go on high profile dates, I’ll publicly propose to you, and we’ll have a grand wedding ceremony on the 20th of June.”
I frown, and Alexander sighs. “The media are tough on us,” he says. “They’ve followed me everywhere, and they’ve seen me on plenty of dates, some of them fairly recent. They know we can’t be married. I don’t want our marriage to start with rumors about me two-timing you while we were dating, so we’ll need that to die down first. We’ll stage a perfect relationship for the press and my grandfather.”
I look into his eyes, feeling oddly hurt. “Just tell me the truth, Alexander. June 20th? It’s my brother’s wedding day. You want to use me to overshadow the news of their engagement and wedding.”
He places his index finger underneath my chin and lifts my face. All I find when I look into his eyes is ruthlessness. “Clever girl,” he says. “Yes. We’re going to do just that.”
My heart breaks even as I force a smile onto my face. I was terrified that all he’d be able to think about when he sees me is Matthew.
But it’s worse.
When he looks at me, it’s Jennifer he sees.
All I am is a tool to get to her, to rattle her, to hurt her. Even now, when it’s me that bears his last name, it’s her he thinks of. It will always be her.
Chapter 15
E lena
I walk through Alexander’s bedroom, feeling restless. He helped me pack my belongings and dropped me off before going back to work, so I’ve got at least a few hours to myself. I’m nervous as I glance at my luggage in the corner. Sharing a room with Alexander… just thinking about tonight has my heart racing.
This entire space is amazing, and from now on, this’ll be home to me. It feels like a luxurious suite in a six-star hotel. He must’ve hired an interior designer to remodel everything. It’s been years since I’ve been surrounded with such sheer luxury.
I pause beside his bed, my heart sinking when I notice Alexander has a photo of Jennifer and him on his nightstand. I pick it up carefully and sit down on his bed, my hands trembling. It’s been over a year since they broke up, yet he still has a photo of the two of them. Is this what he looks at before he goes to bed, is she still the first thing he sees when he wakes up?
My heart constricts painfully as I put the photo back. He’s made it clear that he won’t ever love me, but I still remember the way he loved Jennifer. It was clear for everyone to see that she was his entire world. I’m not much of a dreamer; every single hope and dream I had came crashing down on me when I lost my entire family, each of them in a different way. But part of me… part of me hoped I’d someday have a family of my own. A husband that loves me, a home filled with laughter and happiness. I won’t have any of that now that I’ve sealed my own fate.
I can’t have romantic notions. I can’t have hope. Alexander has been clear from the very start, and I can’t delude myself into thinking he’ll love me one day. I can’t set myself up for heartache.
I glance back at the photo and bite down on my lip. I may be his wife now, but there’s no guarantee that he won’t come to regret marrying me. If my father and brother can turn their backs on me, then so can Alexander. I need to remember that.
I try my best to clear my mind as I walk into Alexander’s walk-in closet, pausing in surprise when I find a whole wall full of women’s clothes, shoes, and bags. For a second my heart drops, but then I notice that everything still has the tags on. My eyes flutter closed as relief courses through me.
Looks like the family stylist works quickly. I shouldn’t be surprised they’ve got my size. Alexander’s background check must’ve been quite comprehensive.
Everything in here is the kind of stuff I’d expect Alexander’s wife to wear. Semi-formal, classy, and crazy expensive. It’s the kind of stuff I used to wear, before I was forced to sell everything I own to pay my mother’s bills.
“Do you like it?” a soft voice behind me says. I turn around in surprise, finding Sofia leaning against the door frame, a small smile on her face.
“I do, this is amazing.”
“I got a call as soon as you registered your marriage. I get informed about a lot of things my sons do, though they don’t realize it.”
I chuckle, not surprised at all. Even when we were younger, she always knew what everyone was up to. She took having eyes in the back of her head to a whole new level.
“I guess congratulations are in order, but I do hope you know what you got yourself into, Elena. Alec… he’s not looking for love. I’m glad that the one he married is you, but at the same time I wanted more for you. This isn’t what your mother would want for you, either. Alec has been through a lot, and I’m not sure he’ll even be able to give you a chance. I hope he does, Elena. I really hope he does. If anyone can mend his heart, I think it’ll be you.”
I nod, my heart sinking. “I understand, Sofia. I’m ready to deal with the consequences of my choices.”
Sofia sighs and grabs my hand. “Call me Mom, sweetie. You’re my daughter-in-law now.”
I force a smile onto my face and nod at her.
“I’m selfishly glad that it’s you. You have no idea how much your mother and I wanted you two to end up together when you were little. If things were different, if we weren’t who we are, if the Kennedy name didn’t destroy every hint of love, then maybe you and Alec would’ve been perfect together.”
Her words surprise me. She’s always been a hopeless romantic, so when did she become so jaded? I haven’t seen Alexander’s father around, and I wonder if that might be the cause of it.
I look up at her with a heavy heart. “You two wanted Alexander and me to end up together?” I ask, disregarding her other words. “Not me and Lucian?”
She smiles. “Of course not. Lucian and you are incredibly incompatible, for numerous reasons.”
She looks at me as though she wants to say something, but doesn’t. “I’ll leave you to settle in,” she says, smiling at me. I nod and stare after her as she walks out, shutting the bedroom door softly.
I sigh as I walk into Alexander’s bathroom. His bedroom and bathroom are mostly open plan, and there is no door, just a whole lot of stone and glass. His huge tub is freestanding, and rather than in the bathroom, it’s in front of his windows like a statement piece. The view is astounding, and I can only imagine what it’ll look like as the sun sets.