Samantha shoulders Carter out of the way. “You haven’t had a panic attack in ages, babe. What do you need?”
I flick my eyes to her, but they’re drawn back to Carter. His blue eyes are what I need, his forehead kiss is what I want, his strong arms wrapped around me are a relief . . . and that’s exactly what he gives me. A moment later—or at least it feels like that to me—and I’m truly recovered.
Carter releases me in phases until he’s far enough away to search my eyes for clarity. He must be reassured by what he sees because he lets go. I don’t know how we got here, but I’m sitting in a chair and Carter is kneeling in front of me. Behind him stand Zack, Samantha, and Kayla. Judge Warren must’ve made an escape during my panic attack.
“I’m okay now. Sorry,” I tell everyone.
Samantha frowns. “Don’t do that. No need for apologies. Here.” She holds out a glass of water, and I take it, bringing it shakily to my mouth. Sam swats Carter’s shoulder. “Help your wife,” she orders, pointing at me as if we don’t all know who Carter’s wife is.
I’m Carter’s wife!
But Carter doesn’t move toward the glass. He smiles, eyes locked on mine. “She’s got it. My girl’s strong.”
His faith helps me find additional strength, and I manage to drink the water on my own without spilling a drop. “Thanks.”
I’m talking to Carter, but Sam makes a harrumph noise that means ‘you’re welcome’ and takes the glass back.
“Do you want something to eat? A little sugar, maybe?” Carter suggests. I nod, and Zack disappears, coming back a moment later with a small plate of cheese cubes, crackers, and chocolate squares that he hands to Carter. Delicately, he feeds me a chocolate, and I chew slowly. When I swallow, he smiles and then holds out a small cracker.
He feeds me a few more bites, each going down easier. “Better?” Carter asks.
“Better,” I tell him gratefully. “Just tired.”
Kayla says quietly to Samantha, “We should go. I think the honeymoon night might be a little difficult with us fussin’ about. And I can tell the reception’s going to be a bore if those snacks are the spread.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Zack tells Kayla.
I glance up to Samantha, a silent communication telling her what she needs to know. She locks her elbow through Zack’s and pulls him. “Let’s go, stud brother.”
He doesn’t budge and squirms his arm out of Samantha’s clutches. She doesn’t give up so easily, though, and shifts behind him, pushing him with both palms on his back. Grunting as she fights against him, she says, “Let’s. Go. Dude, what are you made of? Steel and concrete?”
Kayla takes a gentler approach and tells Zack, “I really think Luna needs to rest.”
Zack looks at me in question, and I nod, both that I’m okay and that I do want to rest a bit. “Okay,” he relents, though it’s reluctant. Jokingly, he pushes back a little to throw Samantha off, chuckling as she stumbles.
I’m smiling at their antics and glance back to Carter to see if he’s as amused as I am, but his eyes are still focused only on me. I’m feeling better, but Carter is still worried about me.
I reach up to cup his face, my thumb soothing the worry lines beside his frown. He tilts into my touch and confides, “That scared the shit outta me.”
“I’m sorry. It just happens. Sometimes, I don’t even know why. But I really am okay,” I reassure him.
Carter leans forward and scoops me up into his arms, carrying me bridal style toward the bedroom door. He calls over his shoulder, “Lock up on your way out.”
I whisper, “I don’t know if I’m that okay.”
“La-la-la-la,” I hear Zack singing.
In the bedroom, Carter sets me down on the side of the bed and bends down, taking one foot and then the other into his hands to pull my shoes off. I put my hands on his shoulders, sighing in relief at being out of the heels. “I really hate those things.”
“Then why wear them if you don’t like them? Your Converse are adorable on you.”
“Can’t really wear those with a wedding dress, though.”
Carter grunts. “You could’ve. It would’ve been cute on you.”
“Excuse me,” Samantha says from the doorway. “I brought this.” She holds up a plate piled with cheese, crackers, and chocolate. She comes in, setting the plate on the nightstand, and then disappears into the bathroom for a moment. She returns with her bag over her shoulder and a knowing smile. “Be good, kids,” she says with a wave. “Or even better, be naughty!”
A moment later, the door opens and closes solidly. We’re alone and married. Expectations fall heavily onto my shoulders. “Carter—”
“Stay here,” Carter orders before he disappears into the bathroom too. I hear water running and smile, realizing he’s filling the bathtub. When he comes back, he pulls me to my feet, guiding me to the tub’s side. Carter looks me up and down thoroughly. “You look gorgeous in this. I want to remember every detail.”
I turn slightly, showing him the back. “This is my favorite part.”
Carter smiles. “Not the dress, Luna. I want to remember every detail of you today.”
And now I’m smiling too.
Carter helps me take the dress off with delicate fingers, and though I love it, I want it off too. It feels naughty to be naked while he’s fully dressed in a suit, but he helps me into the tub and I sit down in the hot water. “You getting in with me?” I ask.
“Don’t have to tell me twice.” He yanks his shoes off, pulling at his suit to get it off as quickly as possible.
It’s endearing, seeing how urgent he is, and I laugh as he nearly leaps into the tub with me, making waves as he plops down. He stretches out, pulling me between his legs, and I lie back against him. “You’re a lumpy pillow,” I tell him. He shifts a bit, trying to make me more comfortable. “Didn’t say I didn’t like it,” I tease.
He wraps his arms around me, one lying across the top of my chest and the other beneath my breasts. I sink into him, feeling so much better. “Thank you,” I say quietly. “For being there.”
Honestly, I’m a little embarrassed by my panic attack. Sam was right, I haven’t had one in a long time, but today was a lot.
“You don’t need to apologize, Luna. I’m sorry if I pushed you too far.” Carter’s quiet apology is accompanied by a kiss to the top of my head.
Quietly, I think about my reaction, and as I figure out what I’m feeling, I tell Carter, “It’s not too far. I think what we did just kinda hit me all at once. How are you not freaking out?”
I feel a rumbling hum against my back as he speaks. “You’re a good person, Luna. That makes this easier, I think. You don’t understand how rare and special you are, but I’m honored to be your husband—even like this—and see you discover yourself. Marriage aside, I’m just glad to know you now.”
Hot tears fill my eyes. I don’t know if I’ve ever felt more seen. I swallow thickly, not sure what to say to that. But I don’t need to say anything. Carter pulls me in tight for a squeezing hug and then grabs the shower gel and a poufy sponge from the deck of the tub, using them to wash me—gently and thoroughly.