Sunshine: eye roll emoji Get over yourself, you’re not even that good.
Me: I rock ur world, sunshine. Admit it.
Sunshine: Whatever.
Before I can reply, she starts typing again. Over and over those dots wiggle, endlessly for two entire minutes. Then they stop.
I’ve just about given up when a text finally rolls through.
Sunshine: I can’t wait to see you today.
This is my favorite part of my day, lounging in my hotel room, spending these fleeting moments texting with Jennie about nothing before I have to drag myself out of my snug cocoon and start my day, before she heads off to rehearsal.
This past stretch has felt like the longest road trip of my life. Maybe because I know what’s waiting for me, because tomorrow I’m finally going to open my damn mouth and tell Jennie exactly what I want and hope to God it’s what she wants too. I know things are complicated with her brother and her looming job offer, but I’d rather take the leap and commit to figuring it out together than never try. I’m not reckless enough to let her slip through my fingers.
So when our plane takes off forty-five minutes later and I’m munching on my breakfast, all I’m doing is counting the hours until we land, until Jennie’s done with her final rehearsal, and I can watch her bound over to the car when she finds me waiting out front.
“You’re coming,” Carter grumbles the order.
Jaxon groans, pushing his empty tray away. “Dance isn’t even a real sport.”
“The fuck it’s not. Try telling that to my sister and then see if you can backtrack fast enough to avoid getting your ass kicked by a girl. She works out just as much as I do, and I promise you, she can take you.”
“What if I have a date tomorrow night? It’s Valentine’s Day.”
“Nobody wants to go on a date with you,” I quip, and immediately regret it.
Jaxon’s eyes spark. “What about you, Andersen? You got a date tomorrow?”
“Uh, no. I’ll be at the recital, like everyone else.”
“The night is long. Nobody you’re hanging out with later?”
I frown so hard it hurts, and scratch at my temple, squinting. “Nope. Can’t think of anyone.”
“Really? Not a single person? Wow.” Jaxon’s drawl is as irritating as his smirk, and I flip him the bird when Carter glances down at his phone. “Hey, Beckett. I heard your sister is close with her dance partner. They a thing?”
“Ha.” Carter sticks his hand in his box of Oreo O’s. “Jennie wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole.”
“It’s inevitable they’d give it a go at least once, no? Dancing’s so intimate, and they’ve been together for years.
There’s a twitch in my left eye, and my pulse thunders in my neck.
Carter crushes his cereal in his fist before shoveling it in his mouth. “Abso-fucking-lutely not. I’d let her date you before I’d let her date him.”
“You don’t get to pick who she dates,” Adam reminds him. “Jennie’s an adult.”
“Wouldn’t the main thing be her happiness?” I add as casually as I can manage. “No matter who she’s with? Even if it’s Simon.” Simon’s face is gonna meet my fist if he ever tries to touch her without her consent again.
Carter looks out the window. “She’s not interested in a relationship, so this conversation is pointless.”
My nape prickles. “What?”
“She’s not ready.” His eyes meet mine, conveying without words what he’s referring to. But I also think he’s wrong.
“Maybe she is now.”
“She’s not.”
“Did she say that?” Emmett asks. “Or are you assuming? Sometimes sisters prefer to not tell their excessively overprotective brothers about their sex lives.”
“I’m not assuming anything. She said it just a couple days ago when we were at Hank’s. He asked her when she was going to be ready to let someone in, and she said she didn’t feel like committing to anything or anyone right now. Didn’t want to be tied down, and didn’t see a reason to make any changes when she’s happy as is. We don’t lie to each other.”
The heat of Adam and Jaxon’s stares burn into my face. Both hold sympathy, but I don’t need it. I’m right about Jennie.
That’s what I tell myself for the next four hours, but each mile we fly closer to Vancouver has me more uncertain than the last, and I hate that I’ve gone from confident to second-guessing in the same morning. We lose Wi-Fi halfway through the flight, so even if Jennie wasn’t busy with Simon, I still wouldn’t be able to get a response.
Adam claps my shoulder as I walk through the parking lot, head down, waiting for service to return as I bury my face in my phone.
“Don’t let what Carter said back there bother you. Just talk to her. I’m sure you’re both on the same page.”
“Right.” I nod. “Yeah, I’m sure we are.”
Cranking both the ignition and heat, I wait for my phone to connect to my car, fingers tapping on the heated steering wheel. When it finally connects, it buzzes and dings, over and over, and a knot clenches between my shoulders at the notifications waiting for me.
Eight missed calls and twelve texts. All from my sisters.
I hit the most recent call, Gabby’s soft sniffles quickly filling my car, the fear in her voice thick and shaky, making me want to jump right back on a plane.
“Garrett,” she whimpers. “I’m scared. I want you to come home.”
“What’s wrong, Gabs?”
“Mom and Dad got in a fight.”
“A fight? Is everyone okay?”
“They were screaming and Alexa made me and Stephie come into her room.”
“Is everyone okay?” I repeat.
“I don’t know, Garrett!” Her sobs pierce the air and my heart squeezes in my chest.
“Where’s Alexa? Let me talk to her.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose while I wait. My parents fought a lot when I was a kid, but the source was always my dad’s drinking. Since the girls have come along and my dad’s been sober, things are different. I can’t pretend to know all that happens from across the country, but every time I’m home, they’re a happy family, and I feel a little bit left on the outside.
“Garrett?”
“Lex. What’s going on?”
“Can you come home? Please?”
“I can’t come home. Not right now. You know that.”
“Hockey’s always more important to you than we are!” Alexa’s voice trembles with each ragged breath, her telltale sign she’s trying not to cry, barely hanging on.
“Alexa,” I coax gently. “You’re upset and overwhelmed right now; I can hear that. I’m tied to a contract with my job. That means I can’t jump on a plane and fly home whenever I want to. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you, or that you aren’t important to me. I do love you, and you guys are the most important things in my life.”
“That’s not true. If it was, you wouldn’t always leave us.”
“Lex—”
“No! You’re never here when we need you! I…I…” The dam breaks, and through Alexa’s sobs, I still hear the way she chokes out her next words before she hangs up on me. “I hate you!”