Don’t leave.
I love you.
Words I will never say.
I can only show her with my mouth, my hands, my cock. In this moment, everything I am is devoted to her pleasure. I change my angle so I can reach between our bodies to stroke her clit. Cassandra cries out. “More.”
“Anything for you.” The words have too much intensity, too much truth, but there’s no recalling them now. I keep up the exact touch she seems to find the most pleasing and watch as she comes apart beneath me. I will never get enough of the moment of total surrender when she orgasms. The trust she places in me is staggering. I’ll do everything I can to ensure she never regrets it.
I slow down, giving her time to come back to herself, giving myself time to wrestle back from the brink. She blinks up at me, dark eyes wide. “I want to touch you.” I hesitate, but she presses harder. “Apollo, please.”
Again, I can deny her nothing. The truth is that I want her hands on me and desperately. I nod jerkily. “Yes.” I fumble for the rope binding her wrists, finally getting it loose with a curse that makes her laugh.
The first thing Cassandra does is cup my face in her hands and tug me down for a devastating kiss. Everything falls away. This time, when I move inside her, it’s with less control. It feels too good. She feels too good. She shifts one hand into my hair and coasts the other down my back to grab a fistful of my ass.
Just like that, my control snaps. I drive into her, needing to be deeper, needing to take her harder, simply needing. She cries out against my lips. Too soon. It’s too soon, but neither of our bodies seem to care. Cassandra orgasms, her pussy clenching around me.
Words spill from me, drawn forth by sheer need. “You’re perfect. Fucking perfect.” I bury my face against her throat as I come. My body keeps moving even as my mind shorts out, grinding into her and making both of us moan.
Slowly, oh so slowly, the racing heartbeat in my ears starts to recede. I become aware of Cassandra tracing abstract patterns over my back. It feels good. Really good.
Still, there’s the condom to consider.
I groan and start to shift away. She, naturally, responds by tightening her legs around my waist. “Just a little longer.”
It’s tempting to give in, but the longer we stay like this, the more likely for the condom to not work the way it was designed. I lean back enough to kiss her. “I’ll be right back.”
It’s far more difficult than it has a right to be to leave her in bed and duck into the bathroom to dispose of the condom. I take a few seconds to clean up and hurry back into the bedroom, half-sure that the moment will have passed.
Cassandra is exactly where I left her, her body relaxed, her eyes closed. She opens them as I approach the bed. “Come here.”
I’m all too happy to do exactly that. I climb onto the bed and settle next to her. It’s the most natural thing in the world to pull her close. She fits perfectly against me and she does this achingly adorable little snuggling thing against me. She’s not tense and upset like she was before. I’ve given her exactly what she needs, and that knowledge sits like a comfortable weight in my chest. I know I should hold her loosely in all things, but I can’t help tightening my arms around her and drawing her closer yet.
If I only get this for a few more days, I will take everything she gives. Even these intimate little moments. Especially these intimate little moments.
“Apollo.” She says my name slowly, dreamily. “You said fuck three times. That’s got to be some kind of record.”
That surprises a laugh out of me. “In that moment, I was…inspired.”
“I’m taking it as the highest of compliments.” She smiles against my skin. “I don’t think I can walk. My legs are doing this little tremor thing that would be worrisome if I wasn’t riding the high of like…multiple orgasms.”
My chest can’t decide whether it wants to expand or close. I settle for simply breathing. It’s enough. Right here, right now, it’s more than enough. “You come so beautifully, Cassandra. How could I not want to experience that as many times as possible?” I hesitate. Maybe now isn’t the time to get into it, but I want her to know the truth. “I’m sorry that I brought you here and put you in a position where you were exposed to violence again, but I’m not sorry that this has happened between us.”
“This afternoon…” She lifts her head, her expression going serious in a way that makes my stomach drop. “I know we don’t move in the same world, for all that we both live in Olympus, but it’s never been clearer.” She swallows hard. “But I don’t regret this time with you, either.”
That’s the crux of it. If it was a matter of money or power, I might be able to convince Cassandra to stay. But the reality that I cannot guarantee her safety if she didn’t leave… It’s too high a price to ask of her. No matter what my feelings are in the matter.
“Cassandra.” I catch her chin in a light grip, enjoying the way her eyes flutter a bit at the contact. “Our time numbers in the days, the hours. I’m not going to do a single thing to shorten it.”
“Me either.” She lays her head down on my chest again and tightens her grip around my ribs.
The space between us is filled with things we’ve agreed not to speak about. I hold her close and smooth a hand over her hair. This moment is another to tattoo on my memory. Just as valuable as what preceded it. More, really.
Still, I am not going to waste a second of my time left with Cassandra.
I start to press her onto her back, but she wiggles out of my grip. When I raise my eyebrows, she smiles a little. “I feel a bit better now, and it seems a shame to waste all these hours alone with you.” Her smile goes devious as she trails her nails lightly down my stomach. “May I, Apollo?”
I can deny her nothing. “Anything for you, love.”
28
Cassandra
We don’t sleep much that night. Every time we start to drift off, it’s as if a frenzy overtakes us and then we’re at it again, burning through Apollo’s condom stash. The way this man looks at me… Even as pleasure washes away my thoughts again and again, I can’t quite shake the fear that this is the best it will ever be.
That I’ll never be with someone who touches me the way Apollo does.
That I’ll never find someone who sees me the way Apollo does.
The temptation to stay in this bedroom and hide away from the world is almost overwhelming. He feels it, too. It’s there in the almost desperate way he reaches for me upon waking, flipping me onto my stomach and pleasuring me with his mouth until I’m begging him to fuck me. This time, there’s no slow teasing or ramping up. He barely pauses long enough to roll on another condom before he grabs my hips and fucks me like he can’t get close enough. I love every moment of it, even if I can’t fully escape the specter of what comes next.
Not even coming around his cock enough times to lose count can fully banish the threat of the future.
Or the memory of what happened in the library.
He finishes with a curse, grinding into me hard enough to shove me over the edge into yet another orgasm. I sob into the sheets. It’s too much and yet at the same time I’m terrified that it will never be enough. Not enough pleasure, not enough memories to hold back the tide of time. Years passing have a way of dulling the edges, both good and bad. I know that better than most.