“Uh…” Molloy looked to me and I shrugged, having no fucking clue what any of it meant. “Yeah, sure?”
“Okay, well, let’s just have a look.” Retrieving the wand from the machine, the woman rolled it over my girlfriend’s stomach. “You’ll feel lots of pressure on your lower abdomen and pelvic area, but it shouldn’t be painful.”
Attention riveted to the screen in front of us, I watched as it transformed from darkness to a weird pale orb, with a strong pulsing movement coming from the middle of it.
“Lovely,” the technician said, gaze flicking between the wand and the screen as she tapped on the keypad and changed angles. “Yes, you’re definitely pregnant.”
“Oh fuck,” Molloy and I choked out at the same time, as we both shifted closer to get a better look at the screen.
“That’s it?” Molloy asked, squeezing my hand, as we both eyed the tiny alien shaped creature floating around on the screen. “That’s the baby?”
“Yeah, and listen to this.” Pausing, the technician pressed a few buttons on the screen, causing a galloping noise to fill the room. “That’s a beautiful, strong heartbeat.”
“That sounds like a racehorse,” Molloy breathed. “That’s really the heartbeat?”
“Uh-huh, and judging by the size of this little bean, you have your dates spot on. You’re fourteen weeks and three days gestation, giving you an EDD of 20-09-2005. Congratulations, Mom and Dad.”
“Oh Jesus, Joe,” Molloy choked out, swinging back to look at me. “It was the Tommen party.”
“Yeah,” I managed to get out, though I was sure my heart was thundering ten times faster than the kid housed in my girlfriend’s womb. “Fucking Gibsie and his spliffs of Moher.”
“And the champagne.”
“Fucking champagne.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Nothing,” we both chorused in unison.
Shaking my head, I asked, “So, ah, what happens next?”
“Well, Mom here will be given an appointment with a midwife to go over medical history, family history and what not, and we’ll go from there.” She continued to scan Molloy’s stomach as she spoke. “As you can tell from the crowded hallways and waiting room, we’re pretty swamped this afternoon, so an appointment will be sent out in the post for the next week or so.”
“What are you checking for?” Molloy asked, tone wary, as she watched the technician move the wand over her stomach.
“You’re a twin, so I’m just making sure we don’t have any little surprises hidden away from view.”
“What the fuck?” I demanded, heart gunning in my chest. “There’s more?” I glared at my girlfriend. “There’s more?”
“No, no, no,” Molloy chuckled nervously, pushing the technician’s hand away. “One surprise was quite enough, thanks. Don’t go looking for problems, dammit.”
“Don’t worry. I can only see one fetal membrane sac.”
“Thank Jesus for that,” I strangled out, sinking back on the chair and pressing my hand to my chest. “Don’t do that to me.”
SOLD ON YOU
AOIFE
“Are you okay?” Joey asked, when we parked up at the footpath outside of my house later that afternoon.
The drive back from the hospital had been spent mostly in silence, while we both mentally reeled. He had his eyes locked on the road ahead of us the entire time, while I had been unable to tear my gaze away from the strip ultrasound images the technician had printed off for us.
It was real.
I heard the heartbeat.
There really was a little baby growing inside of my body.
“Molloy?” Killing the engine of the car, Joey unfastened his seatbelt and turned in his seat to face me. “Are you okay?”
I wasn’t sure.
It all felt so surreal.
I didn’t know what to do or how I felt.
“Are you?”
He shrugged almost helplessly. “She called me Dad, Molloy.”
“I know.” Relieved that he seemed to be reeling too, I nodded eagerly and turned in my seat and mirrored his actions. “She called me Mom, Joe.”
“It sort of just hit me when we were in there, you know?” he mused, rubbing his jaw. “We’re going to be parents.”
“To a person,” I agreed, chewing on my nail nervously. “A literal human being.”
“This time next year, there’s going to be a kid back there,” he added, gesturing to the backseat of my car. “One we made.”
“Never mind next year,” I choked out. “We’re going to have a baby this Halloween.” My eyes widened. “Halloween, Joe. We’re going to have a trick-or-treater.”
“And Santa at Christmas.”
“And the Easter bunny in Spring.”
“And I don’t have a house, or a car, or a fucking qualification.” He scrubbed his face with his hand. “We are so out of our depth here, baby.”
“You’re fine,” I accused. “You’re amazing with babies. I’m the one in trouble here. The only infant I’ve ever held was my cousin’s pet baby gerbil and guess what happened to it, Joe? I dropped it. Uh-huh. That’s right. The poor thing nose-planted its cage when I was left in charge.”
“Okay, comparing your ability to mother our child to caring for your cousin’s pet rodent is not the same thing, Molloy.”
“Maybe not, but I’m not exactly the responsible mother-type, am I?”
“And I am?”
“Oh please.” I rolled me eyes. “You’ve been a dad for your entire life. You even have that ‘don’t make me come up those stairs’ dad threat down to a fine art.”
“Wow. Thanks.”
“I’m serious, Joe. You’ve got this. I’m screwed.”
“Give me another look at that,” he muttered, snatching the baby scan out of my hand and holding it up to his face. “Oh Jesus, I think I see a dick.”
“What? No, you don’t.” Gaping, I snatched the picture back and studied where he was pointing to. “That’s not a dick, that’s a leg.”
“No, that’s a leg,” he corrected, tapping the picture. “That’s another leg. And that is a dick.”
“That’s the baby’s cord.”
“That’s a dick, Molloy.” Dropping his head on the steering wheel, he muttered something incoherent under his breath and groaned loudly. “It’s a boy.”
“But you said it’s too early to tell.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t know what to tell ya, because that’s a dick.”
“But how can you tell?“
“Trust me, I have seen too many of those fucking sonograms down through the years. I know a dick when I see one.”
“What if you’re wrong?”
“I hope I am.”
“Joey.” I slapped his arm. “Don’t say that.”
“Don’t give him my name,” he whispered, head still resting on the steering wheel. “Please, Aoif, just give him yours and break the cycle.”