"Maddison, I would never hate you,” I say quietly, steeling my jaw. The thought of her actually believing that makes my own stomach hurt. Angry or not, I could never hate her.
"I just knew that the moment I told you, you would leave. Briggs, I don't have a huge family. I have my grams and Tyler and Kyle. Then, I had Olive and you. And that's enough for me because I’m surrounded by people who love me unconditionally, and the thought of losing you." Her voice breaks, gutting me even further. "I was a coward, and I shouldn’t have let my own insecurities come in between us. I'm sorry, more than you could possibly know. And that post? It wasn’t about just asking you to forgive me, it was about making sure that I made things right, not just for you, but for everyone else. I owed it to everyone to be honest. I hope you can forgive me, but if you can’t, I still needed to take responsibility for my actions."
Her voice is barely above a whisper, and I want to reach out and wipe the tears from her cheeks.
"Fuck, I hate seeing you cry," I say honestly.
Which only makes her cry harder. She covers her mouth, stifling a sob.
"Can you ever forgive me? Can we ever fix this?”
Silence settles between us for a moment, before I reach out and slide my arms around her shoulders, hauling her to me.
She stiffens for a moment, taken by surprise at my sudden embrace, but I just hold her tighter.
Hearing her cry, hearing the raw pain and heartache in her voice, made me fucking sick, and I couldn't stand another second of it.
The honest to God truth is in the past week, I’ve thought more about my life in the past three years than I have ever done before. Kinda hard not to when you’re forced to step back and confront all of the shit you had been shoving down deep inside.
Yeah, I’ve changed, and all of it had to do with the catalyst that was my brother. His betrayal.
But I still hadn’t let it go, not deep down where it was buried, only resurfacing at times like this.
After talking to Reed, I realized that Maddison didn’t keep this from me to hurt me. To deceive me or to betray me in any way, no.
She’s not Beau, and it was time that I stopped comparing everyone to him, because at the end of the day… he’s the only one responsible for his actions, and I can’t automatically assume that every person that has my trust will break it with bad intentions. People will make mistakes, no one is perfect, but that still doesn’t make them Beau.
Not when I’m surrounded by good people who have shown me true friendship, loyalty, and love.
And it’s times like these when those traits ring true.
Reed helped me work through my hurt and helped me sort through a way to deal with it, to accept it, and to realize that not everyone I love will break me the way that my brother did.
Maddison held the truth from me because she didn’t want to hurt me.
"Does this m-mean you f-forigve me?" she sputters. I can feel her tears soaking my thin t-shirt, and I want to do whatever I can to make them fucking stop, because I can't stand it.
"Baby, please stop fucking crying. I can't stand it. Please," I beg.
Sniffling, she pulls back and looks up at me. "I'm so sorry, Briggs. I'm so sorry that I kept this from you. I'm so sorry I didn't have the courage. I was just s-so scared to l-lose you-u-u."
I pull her back to me. "Shh, stop crying, baby. Listen, I hate this. I hate that it happened, but we love each other and when people love each other, they work through their issues. They stop, listen, and don't give up when it gets hard. If there's anything I've learned over the past few years, it's those who you're meant to love? There's no question where they belong in your life. I know that my life isn't anything without you or Olive, Maddison.”
"I just want our family back together. I never expected to be a family, and then we were one, it was ripped away and it was my fault, I’ll do anything to build your trust again."
I know exactly what she means, and it has everything to do with the decision to move past this. Holding on to that anger, refusing to move on… that's only going to hurt us all in the end. In my heart, she's it for me.
There's no doubt. No question. She is mine and I am hers.
Maddison is the love of my life, and we're going to fight for our love, no matter what it costs.
Yeah, she made a mistake, and I guarantee it’s not the first or last that either of us make. Relationships are hard work, but what I do know is that my love for her can’t be shaken, and I trust in her love for me.
We’ll move past this, stronger than before, and not just because she learned from her mistake, but because it forced me to confront my own issues. I can’t be afraid to forgive just because someone I once loved hurt me. If I want people to see past my mistakes, I need to be able to see past theirs.
I think I’ll start with sitting down with my brother, getting the closure I need to move on with my life without all of the bitter anger in my heart. Not for him, but for me. Because if anything, I deserve it.
I deserve to be able to move on without letting what happened weigh me down.
I want to love my girls and be proud of the man that I’ve become.
“All I know is that my future is you and Olive. I can’t ever imagine waking up without the two of you. I love you, and I don’t know if you know this, but I told Olive I was going to marry you one day, and the thing is… I always keep my promises, especially to my baby girl.” I bring my lips to hers and kiss her. Soft and sweet.
Showing her that no matter what happens, they’ll be my always girls.
Spotted: Briggs Wilson finally gets the girl. I guess he did something right after all ;）
Sincerely,
Briggs Wilson
Epilogue
"If I never have to blow up another balloon in my life, it'll be too fucking soon." Graham groans from his spot face down on the couch. "I had no idea this was a form of torture until now. Thanks for that guys.”
"Graham, you blew up maybe twenty? Probably closer to ten.” Maddison laughs. She's got Olive on her hip who's giggling at her Uncle G. I'd never admit it out loud, mostly because Graham doesn't need the ego boost, but he probably is her favorite Uncle. They share a bond that's not surprising with how much Graham loves her, and when he's on the road, she constantly crawls around the house saying "G-G-G-G".
Olive has lots to say these days and I fucking love it. Not a day goes by that I don't thank God for giving her and Maddison to me. Watching her grow and become this beautiful, smart, curious baby girl has been the best thing I've ever experienced. This has been the best year of my life, and it feels like my life is finally starting.
I glance at Maddison and give her a wink, chuckling when her cheeks turn pink. You see right now she's got her hair fixed, and her makeup on, wearing a pink dress for Olive's first birthday party that's about to happen in about an hour, but this morning? Well let's just say I gave her enough orgasms that you'd think it was her birthday.
Most days are chaotic. Olive's officially crawling and getting into any and every thing she can get her little hands on. She's going through a sleep regression, and Maddison's exhausted. I'm exhausted.
But we're happy. Not a day goes by that I don't show my girls how much I love them in whatever way that I can. For Maddison, it's helping around the house without her having to ask. Surprising her with flowers or chocolate depending on her day. Arranging a date night, or a break where she and the girls can go to the spa. For Olive it means sneaking her yogurt melts when Maddison's not looking, watching countless reruns of CocoMelon and reading her favorite ballerina story to her each night before bed. I could recite the lines to both in my sleep, and sometimes I want to pull my hair out but let's be honest, there's nothing I wouldn't do for my baby girl.