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Someone Else’s Life(33)

Author:Lyn Liao Butler

“It’s okay.” Annie stopped when Serena’s eyes flashed and her mouth turned down. “But we can talk about something else if it will make you too sad.”

Serena gave a brave smile. “Let’s talk about something else. Tell me all about your marriage. How do you two make it work?”

“My marriage?” Annie blinked slowly at Serena’s words. “What do you want to know about it?”

“My relationship was such a disaster. I want to know how you guys do it.” Serena’s face softened and she leaned forward, as if anticipating Annie would impart words of wisdom.

“Um . . . I told you. We’re not exactly doing well.” Annie got up and retrieved the box of tissues from Finn’s bedside. “We’re trying, but it hasn’t been the way it was in the beginning.”

“But you’re still together.” Serena took the box from Annie and wiped her eyes. Then she picked up the throw pillow next to her and hugged it to her chest. She seemed to draw comfort from having something in her arms. “I guess I see you two as really well matched. He’s attentive to you but respectful and you look like you have your own life figured out, but you can count on him. Like, he wouldn’t abandon you if something bad happens.”

Annie did a double take. That was how Serena saw them? When she hadn’t even met Brody? “How do you know all this?”

Serena sighed. “Doesn’t matter. I just know. I wish I had a relationship like yours. I thought Danny was the one. There hasn’t been anyone since him, and that was three years ago.”

“Three years is a long time. You haven’t met anyone else in all that time?” Despite herself, Annie’s curiosity was piqued.

“No. And it is a long time. But it still seems like yesterday to me. I just can’t trust guys anymore. We met online, did I tell you that?”

Annie shook her head. “No way. Izzy and Julia have been trying that, but neither are having any luck. Julia met Sheilah through a friend. I’ll have to tell them internet dating does work.” She stopped and grimaced. “Oh, sorry. I guess it didn’t really work.”

“It’s okay.” Serena brushed off her apology with a hand. “It did work at first. We were happy for a while.” She turned to Annie. “He’s Chinese. His full name is Danny Chao.”

“Oh.” Annie’s face remained neutral, even though inside she raised an eyebrow in surprise. Nothing Serena had said before had given Annie a hint that Danny was Asian.

“Yes.” Serena widened her eyes. “Another thing we have in common. We both had, or have in your case, interracial relationships.” She sighed. “I loved everything about him, from his black hair to his beautiful body—slender but not too thin, just muscled enough but not a hulk.” Her face relaxed as she thought back. “I loved his Chinese heritage and the foods he introduced me to. I’d only ever had American Chinese food, as he called it, so when he took me to meet his family and I tasted their home-cooked meals, I was just blown away.” She looked off in space dreamily. “It was exactly what I wanted. This loud, noisy family, all gathered around the dining table, the kids at a separate table since not everyone fit around it. There was so much food, really good food. Dumplings, and soups, sticky rice with shiitake mushrooms and bamboo, thinly sliced beef stir-fried with wide noodles. I even loved the fuqi feipian, the thinly sliced beef heart, tongue, and tripe, tossed in a numbingly spicy sauce. I mean, if you’d told me what it was before I ate it, I probably wouldn’t have. But it was surprisingly good.”

Annie stayed silent, sensing that Serena needed to get this out, to talk about her relationship with Danny and what she mourned about the loss.

“I loved his family. Did I tell you that already?” Serena turned questioning eyes at Annie, who nodded. “It was so full of cousins and relatives, and I couldn’t wait for all the holiday get-togethers when I would finally be a part of a large family. He was so kind to me back in the early days. He lived in lower Westchester and worked in NYC, so it was easy to see each other. I was in Long Island, but we’d meet after work for dinner, and he’d either come to Long Island for the whole weekend or I’d go to him. He always called when he said he would, made sure I got home safely after our dates, picked me up to drive me into the city for a night out even though it would have been easier if I took the train and met him in the city.”

“He sounds like a very considerate person,” Annie said.

“That’s what I thought.” Serena’s expression darkened. “Things were great for the first year. We were both happy when we got pregnant by accident. We had our lives mapped out. We found our dream house.” Her breath hitched. “Then we lost our dream house, and that’s when everything fell apart.”

Marley lifted his head and listened for a moment before letting out a soft woof. Annie cocked her head, but all she heard was the storm still raging outside. She put a hand on Marley to comfort him, and he put his head back down.

“Sorry,” Annie said. “I hope he didn’t hear something we didn’t.”

Serena was silent for a moment too, listening, and when nothing happened, she continued her story. “He said I changed. That I wasn’t the same person he had met. I don’t know what he was talking about. I was still me. How had I changed? I was a mother now, yes, but everything else was the same. I think he was the one who changed. What happened to the man who promised me everything? We hadn’t even said our vows—‘In sickness and in health, through the good time and the bad,’ or however the hell the vow goes. And he left as soon as tragedy struck.”

Serena turned anguished eyes to Annie, and all Annie could do was shake her head and reach out to grip the woman’s hands. All the tragedies they’d each endured in the past few years; was that what was bringing them together?

“It’s almost eerie, isn’t it, how similar our lives are in so many ways? As if we’re living parallel lives,” Annie said. Was that why Serena seemed so familiar with her?

“We’re like two halves of the same person.”

Annie nodded, but a fissure of unease washed over her. “I’m not sure if that’s accurate, but I see what you mean.”

Serena took her hands back and bent her knees up on the couch, wrapping her arms around her legs. “We were going to get married a few months after Johnny’s first birthday. For the first time since my father died, I felt like I belonged to someone.”

“He just left you after Johnny died?” Annie couldn’t fathom it. She knew if this had happened to them, Brody would have stuck with her and they would have been united in their grief. At least, she thought they would have.

“Yes. He loved Johnny. So much.” Serena shook her head. “I think he needed someone to blame, and I was the most obvious person.” She gestured to Annie. “If this had happened to you guys, would your husband have blamed you and left you?”

Annie shook her head, thinking again how Serena was always able to read her mind. “I don’t think so.”

“See, this is why I’ve always thought you had such a great life.”

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