“I’m fine.” Her voice came out like a croak.
“You want a hand back up?”
“No, no.” Annie waved a hand, as if brushing away flies. “I’ve got this.” She turned her back on them and heaved herself up on the paddleboard. This was not her most graceful performance, sprawled half-on, half-off the board, her bikini bottom bunched up in her ass crack so that she knew she was giving Brody a more than generous glimpse of her backside. But that was okay, right? She was keeping their relationship spicy. She finally flopped onto the board and pushed herself up into a kneeling position.
“That was beautiful, Mommy,” Finn yelled. “Before you fell in.”
He broke out in laughter, and Brody joined him. Annie glowered at them, but then she started laughing, until all three of them were hooting, their laughter echoing on the river.
51
The kit arrived two days later. She managed to get a mouth swab from Finn by playing doctor with him, so she wouldn’t scare him. She did the same for herself and then, following the directions on the DNA maternity kit, sent both of their samples back to the company. And then she waited. The instructions had said the results would be sent to her by email, so she tried to put the test out of her mind. She and Brody put in an offer on the house, which was accepted, and they celebrated by taking Finn up to Hanalei for an afternoon.
She was doing better. She had coffee with Kalani one morning and was surprised when she enjoyed her neighbor’s company. Maybe they would be friends after all. She took Marley for long walks on the Kapaa bike trail, running sometimes, feeling her body come back to its former strong self. She took a ballet class for the first time in four years, her muscles trembling from exertion but elation building in her heart. She talked to Julia and Izzy on FaceTime, reassuring them she was okay, and made plans for them to come visit her in Kauai soon.
On Saturday, she went to the Puhi Grove Farm Market in Lihue with Brody and Finn, where they picked up fresh vegetables and fruits from the various stands. Finn got the pancit noodles he loved from the Manna on Wheels Filipino food stand there, while Annie got the kalbi beef plate from the Kauai Kim Chee stand that she dreamed about all week. They went to Shipwreck Beach with Sam and Cam on Sunday, and on Monday, Annie volunteered at the shelter, where she fell in love with a little chiweenie with big ears standing straight up that the shelter had named Ho’o Hui. She knew the little dog would get adopted quickly, so she spent most of the afternoon with her, holding her and giving the scared little thing as much love as she could.
And when, after dinner that night, she checked her email and saw she had a message from the company where she’d sent their DNA, she ignored the beating of her heart and tried to put it out of her mind until she’d gotten Finn ready for bed and Brody was in the bedroom watching TV. Only then did she allow herself to stop and settle on the couch. Her hand reached slowly for her laptop, and she pulled up her email. Taking a big breath, she opened it, ready to finally put this nightmare behind her.
Annie stared at her computer screen. For a second, she actually stopped breathing. Her mind wasn’t comprehending what her eyes were seeing. She sat there, frozen in shock. This couldn’t be happening.
Finn was not her biological son. They were 100 percent certain. The words swam in front of her. She was going to be sick. How was that possible? Had Serena been right, and her son and Annie’s had been switched at the hospital? How could that possibly happen in this day and age?
But in the next moment, Annie remembered how she’d felt that first rush of love for Finn when they placed him on her chest right after his birth. And then she never felt it again. She’d had trouble bonding with him, but had blamed it on everything that had happened to her that year. She’d been so sure Serena was wrong, and that she was as delusional as that file she’d left Annie had shown. But the proof was right there in front of her. Finn was not her biological son.
Slowly, Annie placed the computer next to her on the couch and rose. She crept over to where Finn was sleeping and stared down at him. Her little boy. Who wasn’t hers. If Serena’s story was correct, Annie’s baby had died before he turned one. This was Serena’s child. Tears stinging in her eyes, Annie turned away, putting a hand over her mouth to muffle her sob. What was she going to do? Should she tell Brody that this wasn’t their child? Or should she keep this to herself?
They loved Finn, and Serena was gone. What good would it do if they both knew Finn wasn’t theirs? They couldn’t give him back. They couldn’t get their real son back either. Finn was their real son. They’d raised him, been his parents his whole life, and a DNA test wasn’t going to make that go away. There was no reason to disrupt the fragile bond they’d formed ever since the night of the storm. He was theirs.
Needing air, Annie swept up her cell phone from the coffee table and went to the front door. She signaled to Marley, who had been lying on the floor next to the couch, and they slipped outside quietly. She needed to get out of the Ohana, needed some space. Walking over to one of the two chairs on the lanai, Annie sank down, her shoulders slumped. Her mind spun out of control and adrenaline coursed through her body. Deep down, she knew what she had to do. The thought made her sick, but she had no choice. She had to protect her family.
Heaving out a breath, she made her decision. She wouldn’t tell Brody, but it was a burden she wished she didn’t have to carry alone. Shifting her weight, Annie realized she’d sat on something in the chair.
Rising up, she used the flashlight on her phone to see what it was. Her breath caught. It was her sunglasses. The pair Serena had admitted to taking out of her purse and that she’d found in her bedroom but that had then disappeared again. They sat in front of her now, next to a small square envelope. Goose bumps broke out all over Annie’s skin as she looked around with apprehension. She picked up the envelope and took out a card, which had only one sentence written in all capital letters on it: HE’S MY SON.
Dropping the card so that it fluttered to the ground, Annie scanned the yard. Her heart pounded when the door behind her opened.
“Mommy?”
It was Finn, standing in the doorway in his Snoopy pj’s.
“Finn.” She placed a hand over her heart. “What are you doing out of bed?”
“I saw you come out here.” He looked up at her, his head tilted in question. He scanned the yard like Annie had just done. “Is that woman back?”
She went to him and drew him near, kneeling down so that she could look into his eyes. Serena’s green eyes stared back at her. How had she never noticed that Finn had Serena’s eyes? Ice, sharp and jagged, ran through her veins. But this was Finn, her little boy.
“Why are you out here?” His little voice was so sweet, so precious to her.
“I’m . . .” She stopped, hugging him close. But then the back of her neck tingled.
Annie rubbed her head as her heart rate raced and her breath came in short gasps. Someone was watching them. She could feel it, feel those eyes that had watched her so often over the years trained on her now. But how was that possible? Serena was dead, swept out to sea. Annie’s breath caught, and she forced herself to calm down so she wouldn’t scare Finn as she focused on getting air into her lungs. When she could breathe normally again, she stood and sank down onto the chair, pulling him into her lap.