“Oh god,” Shane said, and buried his face in his hands.
Ilya placed a hand on his back. “What are your teammates saying?”
“Mostly the same sort of thing,” Hayden sighed. “Practice is gonna be weird this afternoon. No question.”
“If I’m even allowed at practice,” Shane moaned.
“There are definitely people on the internet who think you shouldn’t be,” Hayden said. “But, y’know. Fuck ’em.”
“I don’t ever want to look at my phone again,” Shane said to his hands. “I’m going to throw it in the river.”
“We should call Farah,” Ilya said wisely. “She can help.”
“Right. Yes. This is definitely a job for our agent.” Shane dropped his hands to his lap. “God, this sucks.”
“Yes, but it is not so different,” Ilya said calmly. “We were going to tell people ourselves, but now we do not have to.”
“Because they saw us kissing on the internet.”
“At least they know we are great at kissing.”
“It was a pretty top-tier kiss,” Hayden agreed.
Shane refused to acknowledge that. “The playoffs start in two weeks. This is such bad timing.”
“Especially since it’s looking like our teams will meet in the first round,” Hayden added. Then he hunched his shoulders and said, “Sorry. Not helping.”
Shane stood and started pacing. “Fuuuuuuck,” he said, and kicked a dog toy that hit the wall with a squeak. Anya stared at him in what looked like admonishment, like Shane had no right to take out his frustration on innocent dog toys.
“Jesus Christ, what are we going to do? Fuck, what does J.J. think? Oh god.”
“Yeah, you’re gonna have to talk to him,” Hayden said. “He’s, um, not into it.”
Shane met Ilya’s gaze for a moment, and saw concern there.
“He’ll come around,” Shane said, mostly trying to convince himself. “It’s a shock. I get it. I don’t expect everyone to understand, but J.J.’s one of my best friends.”
Hayden stood, then bent to scratch Anya’s ears. “He’s not too happy with me either right now. I think his feelings might be hurt for being left out, y’know?”
Shit. Shane should have told him sooner. “Well. That’s on me. I’ll talk to him.”
Hayden left a few minutes later, but not before Shane gave him a reassuring hug. Hayden had done a good job keeping their secret. He didn’t deserve to feel shitty about this.
When Shane went back to the living room, he found Ilya staring at his phone with one hand over his mouth.
“Are you watching the video?” Shane asked.
Ilya nodded.
“Is it bad?”
“Terrible. Hayden needs to write down what he is going to say in these videos. He is all over the place.”
Shane dropped on the couch beside Ilya. Anya hopped into Shane’s lap, and he held her there, stroking her back and trying not to look at the video.
“There we are,” Ilya said. He was quiet a moment and then said, “Oh yes. This would be hard to deny.” He huffed. “We are really going for it.”
“This is a fucking nightmare,” Shane said faintly.
The couch began to shake, and Shane realized that Ilya was laughing. “It’s not funny.”
“Is very funny!” Ilya squeaked out. “Hayden’s stupid FanMail video. Oh my god. This was somebody’s birthday greeting. Someone named Brad.”
“Sorry, Brad,” Shane mumbled.
That made Ilya absolutely lose it. He fell over on the couch, howling with laughter. Anya whimpered with concern.
“Stop laughing!” Shane said, but now he was laughing too.
Anya leaped to the floor and starting pacing back and forth in front of the coffee table while Shane fell on top of Ilya and laughed until his body ached with it.
“We are so fucked,” Shane sighed when he’d finally calmed down. “How many messages are on your phone?”
“A lot. We should call Farah now.”
Shane nodded slowly. “Probably. Okay. Yeah. Call her.”
Ilya tapped his phone, then set it on the coffee table on speaker mode. Both men crouched forward, waiting for her to answer.
“Ilya. God. How are you holding up?” Farah said as soon as she did.
“Oh. You know.”
“Is Shane with you?”
“Yes,” Ilya said.
“Hi. Hello,” Shane said.
“I’m so sorry this happened. You guys must be devastated.”
“I think I’m more…dazed?” Shane said. “I don’t know. It doesn’t feel real.”
“I wish it wasn’t, but I’m here to help.”
“What do you think the league is going to do?” Shane asked.
“Legally, I’m not sure they can do much. But Crowell will try to do something, that’s for sure.”
Shane’s stomach cramped. Ilya huffed angrily beside him.
“If he does, he’ll be hearing from me,” Farah continued. “If that’s what you want.”
Shane wasn’t sure. The one thing he knew is that he wanted to keep playing in the NHL, and Crowell had the ability to make that difficult, or at least uncomfortable. Shane was pretty sure Crowell couldn’t actually kick him or Ilya out, though.
He glanced at Ilya, who only shrugged. “Hopefully it won’t come to that,” Shane said, though he doubted they’d be so lucky.
“What should we do next?” Ilya asked.
“First,” Farah said, “I’m going to write an official statement. Unless you want to write it yourselves.”
“Nope,” Shane said at the same time Ilya said, “No way.”
“I figured. I’ll get that written and send it to both of you when I’m done. I think we should post it as soon as possible.”
“Okay,” Shane said, “but I want to wait until after practice this afternoon at least. I need to talk to my team.”
“That’s reasonable. But we should release it tomorrow at the latest, probably.”
“All right. Yeah.”
“What about your team, Ilya?” Farah asked. “Have you spoken to anyone there?”
“Not yet. But I think it will be okay.”
“I think so too. But I’m sorry this happened,” Farah said. “It’s awful. Hayden must feel terrible.”
“He does,” Shane said, “but we talked to him. It’s not his fault.”
“Good. Okay, let me get cracking on this statement. I know things are bleak right now, but it will die down. We’ll steer things back your way, I promise.”
Shane stared at the phone for a while after the call ended, still numb. Ilya rubbed his shoulder.
“Farah will help,” Ilya assured him.
“I’m worried she can’t.”
“I know.” Ilya sighed. “I have to go back to Ottawa now. Our plane leaves in a few hours.”
“Right. Shit.”
“I am sorry to leave you now. Will you be okay?”
“I mean, no. I’ll be a fucking mess.” He blew out a breath. “I need to try to talk to J.J. before practice.”