In that moment, he looked like he wanted me, but his acting fell by the wayside as soon as we stepped out of the car.
I, on the other hand, felt far too natural holding his hand, leaning into his chest. I’m praying the show I put on was as convincing for Ryan as it was for his GM.
Because the truth is, I liked it.
It’s a frustrating awareness to have when I realize how disloyal I feel. I loved Alex my entire life, and now for the first time ever, I’m enjoying the company of another man. Alex can fuck someone else and yet, here I am, still so loyal to that relationship and the love I had for him, that a pang of guilt flashes through me simply from enjoying another man’s company.
“There she is,” Stevie says, sliding into the space beside me, leaning her elbows back on the bar.
And just then, I find her twin across the room as he interacts with a few older men who are nothing short of enthralled by him. He stands straight, shoulders back and tight, nodding along with whatever they’re saying. Their basketball icon is here tonight, professional and on edge.
“Daily update for you, Vee.”
“No thank you.”
“Your brother is hot as hell, and I'd happily let him bend me over this bar top.” I pull my drink to my lips, keeping my attention on him.
“Could’ve easily gone through my night without hearing that.”
“Has he always been this uptight or is it new since I’ve been around?”
“Don’t take it personally. He’s been this way since he got drafted, but I hadn’t noticed how bad it had gotten until I moved here last year and saw it firsthand.”
Two ocean eyes break away from the small group crowding the superstar and find me across the room, pinning me with a breath-taking stare. Ryan may be stiff and uncomfortable, but that man in a suit is any girl’s fantasy. He’s stunning and causes a blush to creep up my cheeks when his lips tilt in a small smile before returning his attention to the crowd in front of him, as if he simply needed to check on my whereabouts before continuing with his evening.
That Ryan Shay smile almost means more because I don’t see it often, and I may be fantasizing about the man every free moment of the day, but no one else needs to know that.
In my periphery, I watch Stevie’s attention bounce from her brother to me and back again.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?”
I turn to face her. “What do you mean?”
“Faking it while also living together. It seems messy.”
“Well, we both know how much Ryan hates a mess,” I tease.
Stevie turns back to face the bar and I join her.
“To answer your question,” she continues. “He’s not uptight per se, but he is aware of the countless eyes watching him, waiting for him to mess up. Ryan doesn’t show his emotions very often because it’s safe for him. It’s safe for his brand.”
I can’t imagine that, altering your life, holding back to appease everyone around you. Not too enthused, but not too solemn either. Not too stoic, but not too animated. What a terrible way to go through life.
Maybe tone it down tonight, Indy. These guys, they don’t like loud women.
These are my coworkers, so sit back and let me do the talking.
You look gorgeous, Indy. All you need to be tonight is pretty.
Alex’s previous words ring in my mind, so maybe I can imagine that.
The bartender interrupts us with a fresh beer in his hand, sliding it across the counter. “This one is on me,” he says to Stevie, with a grin that can only be described as “panty-melting.”
A tattooed hand slides around Stevie’s waist from behind. “Absolutely not.” Zanders’ venomous glare is focused on the soon-to-be dead bartender. “Abso-fucking-lutely not.”
The bartender’s face pales. “Sorry, man.” He holds up his hands in surrender before taking off to serve another patron.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” Zanders keeps his attention on his back before leaning down and dotting kisses down Stevie’s neck. “I can’t take you anywhere,” he murmurs against her skin.
“Ind, you look great.” Zanders turns my way. “This is fun, having you at events with us and not just on the airplane.”
“Well, take a good look. It might be your one and only shot.”
“No way. Your pretend relationship is already on the rocks?” Zanders’ phone dings and he pulls it out while continuing our conversation.
The statement catches me slightly off guard. Of course, Stevie told Zanders that her brother and I are faking it, but I hope it’s not much more than our small circle who knows. The less people who are aware, the safer our lie is.
“Your guy has practically ignored me since we talked to his boss. I could make another one of these athletes my real boyfriend and I’m fairly certain he wouldn’t even notice.”
“I’m pretty sure he’d notice.” Zanders’ chest bubbles with an arrogant laugh while holding his phone out to me.
Ryan
Keep an eye on Indy for me. She has no clue that these guys are eye-fucking the hell out of her in that goddamn dress.
Finding him again, his back is to me as he chats with more fans, and I wouldn’t believe he sent that text unless I saw it with my own two eyes.
“Indigo!” Rio exclaims, holding me out at arm’s length. “You look so…”
I don’t fill in the blank for him. Instead, I give him a moment to choose his descriptive word. Rio is lovable, excitable, and young, but he needs a little coaching when it comes to his approach with women, and we’ve been working on it.
“Bang…” He catches Zanders’ raised brow. “eautiful.”
“Bangeutiful?” I ask.
“Beautiful. You look beautiful, Indy.” He turns towards my friend. “Now, Stevie, you look smoking hot. I’m talking drop-dead gorgeous. Every guy in here is probably thinking about—”
I slap a palm over his mouth, trying not to laugh. “You’ve got a death wish,” I inform him as Zanders arches a challenging brow in his over-confident way.
Rio’s green eyes shine with mischief because he’s a bit of a shit disturber, though always in good fun. He enjoys getting under his teammates’ skin and Stevie is the easiest way to do it.
“Kidding. Kidding. But this blue dress does look great on you, Stevie.”
“Thanks, Rio,” she laughs.
Zanders wraps two possessive arms around her. “Yeah,” he mumbles under his breath. “And it’s going to look even better on my bedroom floor tonight.”
“Rio, come on. Let’s go dance before the Raptors lose two of their best players tonight. One to murder and the other to a prison sentence.”
Rio and I take the crowded dance floor. With a small pull of his wrist, he brings me into his chest where I place a hand on his shoulder. He’s different on the dance floor. He leads with grace and confidence, completely opposite in his approach with women.
“Where did you learn to dance?”
“Six years of ballroom lessons. I was a terrible skater when I was a kid, believe it or not. I had two left feet, so my mother put me in dance lessons to learn balance. I was the best skater on my team a year later.”