The last thing I want is to be compared to the woman before me. I care about Ryan far too much to let him believe that, so I’ll prove it. I’ll move out. That way, he couldn’t possibly continue to believe I was using him.
As soon as Ryan was distracted and all but Ethan and Dom had left the apartment, I left too. But as I haul my duffel bag into the guest bedroom, and before I’ve even changed into my pajamas, I hear his voice from down the hall.
“Happen to see a mouthy blonde tonight? Mile-long legs and a banging brain?” Ryan asks his sister and Zanders.
I can hear the smile in Zanders’ tone as he talks to his fiancée. “I love this for us, Vee. Watching your brother squirm like a love-sick puppy. Mushy motherfucker.”
“Fuck you very much.”
Stevie laughs from where she sits on the couch with Zanders and their dog, Rosie. “She’s in the guest room. She’ll be out in a minute, I’m sure.”
I knew he’d come here or at the very least, call, but he was quicker than I expected.
I’ve only just pulled out my toothbrush to get ready for my night, so with it in hand, I sheepishly make my way down the hall.
Ryan doesn’t seem upset, only slightly unimpressed. Leaning a shoulder against the corner wall of the living room, he keeps his hands in his pockets and one foot crossed over the other, casually unaffected.
“There’s the runaway.”
“Hi.”
Eyes soften. “Hi, Blue.”
Zanders squeals from the couch like a teenager.
“I was giving you some space,” I explain before I’m asked.
“Why would I want space, and from you of all people?”
“Last night—”
“Last night, you didn’t let me finish what I was trying to say.”
He pops off the wall, quickly swallowing the distance between us and meeting me across the room. He crowds me with his beautiful body, stepping into my space as I retreat at the same pace.
His hooded eyes look down at me, bottom lip sliding between his teeth. “Can we finish our conversation now?”
I swallow, audibly, and with a simple nod.
“No one has ever come into my life without just looking for what they can gain from me,” he repeats his words from last night, as if I could forget them. “Until you.”
Backing up, my shoulders hit the wall where Ryan brackets his hands above my head, caging me in, and ensuring I hear his words.
“Until you walked your colorful, messy, and extremely tempting ass into my apartment. I’ve never once felt taken advantage of by you. In fact, if you remember, I was the one who didn’t want you paying rent. I don’t give a fuck if you don’t need to save money anymore, you’re not leaving.”
“That sounds very kidnap-y of you.”
“Don’t tempt me.”
Looking down, I find the bright pink toothbrush still in my hand. My romantic brain played this out a lot differently. Maybe this confession would come in the middle of a rainstorm or announced publicly in front of millions of people. Not while I’m holding my toothbrush in the middle of my best friend’s apartment.
“We have an audience,” I whisper, nodding towards the couple of eavesdroppers on the couch.
“Good. They can watch for all I care.” Ryan gently takes my toothbrush and sets it on a nearby table before draping my arms over his shoulders. “After what they put me through last year? This is the very least they deserve.”
A quick bubble of a laugh escapes me.
The sound causes a beautifully soft smile to tug at the corner of his lip, concaving his dimples. “So, are we done with the whole bullshit conversation about you moving out?”
Ocean eyes drop to my mouth.
“But I spend a lot of your money.”
“Someone needs to.”
“And I’m messy. You don’t like messy.”
“I like your mess.”
“And I’m needy. I have no idea how to be alone.”
“Good. I don’t want you to be alone. I want you to be with me.”
His eyes fall to my throat, watching it work its way through a swallow.
“Come home with me, Blue.”
Apparently, half a second is too long to hesitate because Ryan continues. “And let me make this perfectly clear, even if you say no, I will throw you over my shoulder and take you with me. But I’m working with a knee injury here and would rather you come on your own free will.”
His mouth twitches, trying to keep in a straight line to re-enforce his threat.
I don’t think this man has any idea how funny he can be. He likes to think he’s serious and stoic, but he makes me smile more than anyone else I’ve ever met.
“Take me home, Shay.”
Ryan’s lungs fill with a deep breath before he grabs my duffle bag, links his hand with mine, and leads me towards the door.
“Indy, to make this clear, I don’t want a single daily update tomorrow!” Stevie announces from the couch.
“I’ll text you in the morning with details!”
“I’m getting a new number.”
“Aren’t we the cutest family foursome you’ve ever seen?” Zanders pitches in.
“Love you all,” Ryan finishes from the doorway, pulling me behind him. “Rosie most of all, of course.” Which is ironic seeing as Ryan has to take an allergy pill every time he’s with her, but happily does so anyway just to spend time at their place.
Across the street, he pushes through the doorway of our apartment, swiftly picks me up, and takes me to his bed, tossing me on the mattress. But not before I notice the scraps of papers that make up our relationship pinned back on the fridge.
His chest moves in relief as if seeing me in his house and on his bed has brought him peace. “Right where you belong.” His gaze scans the length of me. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For everything. For tonight. I think I’ve always wanted to have the team over, to have people over, but it scared me. To let people into my life has scared me.” Leisurely, he begins to unbutton his shirt, standing over me. “But you, having you here, I want everyone to see how lucky I am to have you in my home.”
While on my back, I watch Ryan hang his shirt in the closet. I thought about this countless times, knowing he wouldn’t be able to undress without putting every little thing where it belongs, but understanding why he’s like this gives me a whole new appreciation to his cleanliness.
The view isn’t half bad either. All this does is give me more time to admire his rippling chest and lean, muscular arms.
He’s so beautiful and protective and hardworking. How someone didn’t appreciate him is beyond me.
Ryan returns, crawling onto the mattress like a starved man. His hands push my hair away from my face, palms to my temples. “So, thank you, Indigo.”
My legs open around him without hesitation as I sling my arms over his shoulders. “You’re welcome.”
“Now, please, for the love of God, kiss me.”
“Are you sure? Because the other night when we…well, we didn’t kiss.”
His eyes bounce away from mine as he hovers over me. “That’s because I didn’t know what you wanted. I didn’t know if you just wanted to get off or if you wanted me.”