“Sin—”
“What were you thinking?” I ask through gritted teeth. “Where is she? I want to see her.”
“You’re not at Carnage. We’re at the cathedral,” he says slowly, as if I’m hard of hearing. When he understands that I can’t beat him, he takes a step back, shoving his hands into the pockets of his bloody jeans. I don’t even bother asking whose it is. It doesn’t look to be his. Nodding behind me, I turn to look over my shoulder and see her cuddled up on a hospital bed. A blanket pulled up to her neck, sound asleep. I let out a deep breath.
“She passed out about thirty minutes ago. She fought it for as long as she could,” Tyson goes on.
I look over at him. “What in the fuck happened? How did we get here?”
“She got your letter. Cried. A lot. Thought she was going to pass out after she read it. Your phone got a text, it was to Nicholas from the Spade brothers telling him he was free. He got pissed. We rounded up her mother and your dad and went to Carnage. We made a trade, you for them. We brought you to the cathedral. Gavin was already here waiting for us.”
I sigh, lifting my hand to run down my face but I see a bandage wrapped around my wrist. Looking to the other, I see the same thing. “How bad was it?” I ask. I remember them removing my brand and giving me their own. It was hell. But other than that, my head is foggy. Even now, the soft lights are hurting my sensitive eyes. My body is sluggish and although I don’t feel much pain, I do feel light-headed.
“It wasn’t good,” he answers. Stepping back, he rests his back against the counter and crosses his arms over his chest. “Pretty sure she thought you were dead. Then she offered up her brand when Gavin explained you needed a skin graft.”
My hand runs up my bare stomach and to my chest, I flinch when I feel the bandage over where my original Lords brand was. “Please tell me he didn’t—”
“No.” He shakes his head. “He took it from your thigh.”
“Thank God.” I sigh, closing my eyes. They’re growing heavy.
“What you did was stupid, Sin,” he growls. Leave it to Tyson to tell you you’re an idiot. “We found you unconscious. Who knows how long they would have left you bleeding out and hanging in that room. You could be dead right now.”
Cracking my eyes open, I stare at him, and he arches a brow, expecting me to say something. Instead, I look over at Elli cuddled up in the other bed and a smile tugs at my lips. “We all do stupid shit for love, Tyson.” Then I close my eyes again and let whatever drugs Gavin has me on swallow me up into the darkness.
_______________
WHEN I OPEN my eyes again, I sit up and the room starts to spin, making me dizzy. “Take it easy.” A hand gently touches my shoulder and I look over to see Tyson.
Fuck, I thought I had dreamed that conversation with him earlier. Looking around, I find what I’m looking for. Elli—my little demon—lying on the hospital bed next to mine. Where she was earlier. I throw off the blanket and get to my feet as Tyson sighs. I ignore the way my body protests at the smallest movement. I’ve always enjoyed pain. It means you’re not dead. And believe me, you’d be surprised what your body can endure.
Walking over to her bed, I reach out and run my dried-up bloody knuckles down the side of her cool cheek. “Is she okay?” I ask, my fingers going to her neck to check her pulse.
“She’s fine.” I look over to see her father sitting in a chair, arms crossed over his chest and one ankle on his other knee, glaring at me. “Can’t say the same about you.” He looks me up and down, lingering on the bandage covering my chest.
I look down to see my jeans have been removed but I’ve still got my boxer briefs on and there’s another bandage on my thigh. “Don’t start,” I mumble, turning back to her and lifting the blanket to cover her shoulders, tucking it underneath her neck.
“Don’t start?” he repeats, getting to his feet. “Do you—”
“I was trying to give her what she deserved,” I growl, interrupting him. I’m not in the mood for this shit right now. I may be alive, but I feel like I’ve been through hell.
“A dead husband?” he snaps, stepping over toward me.
“A father,” I growl.
Jesus, why is it so hard for them to see what I was doing? That I did it because I love her. That I think she deserved a better life than what she’s had since he died. A part of me was trying to make up for what she’s been through in the past. I love my little demon just the way she is, but I hate what she went through. How many times had there been signs that I chose to ignore or just didn’t catch on to?
“That’s not your job.” He punches himself in the chest. “I had a chance to make it right and you ruined it.”
“Oh, I ruined it?” I scoff. “What were you going to do? Go back to Carnage? Act like you did die all those years ago? That you didn’t come back into her life only to leave her again?”
“Exactly,” he snaps, and she stirs. He lowers his voice and runs his hands through his hair. “I’ve spent nine years at Carnage.” His blue eyes drop to her, and his face softens. “I don’t know how to live here.”
“I get that, but don’t you want to try?” I ask. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy for either one of them but she’s worth trying for.
“I can’t be who I was.” He shakes his head. “I’m not a Lord, I’m not a husband. Hell, I handed her mother over to them. I have nothing to offer her.”
“Offer her?” My brow furrows, confused by his words. “All she ever wanted was you. Her dad. All you have to do is show up.” I point to him. “You think she gives a shit about the Lords?” I shake my head. “And her mother was a fucking worthless cunt who betrayed her.” My voice grows louder. “You get a second chance at life, Nick. It may not be the life you had before, but it’s something that you can share with her.”
The door opens and I look over to see Gavin enter. He comes to a stop when his eyes land on me. “You shouldn’t be up walking around.”
“I’m fine,” I say through gritted teeth.
“I’ll be the judge of that.”
CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE
ELLINGTON
I HEAR VOICES off in the distance as I start to wake from my nap.
“How do you feel?” I recognize Gavin.
“Like you gave me too many drugs.” I hear Sin’s voice and I don’t know if I should cry or scream. I bring my hand up underneath the blanket and cover my mouth to keep myself from doing both.
“It was either immense pain or drug-induced bliss,” Tyson growls. “We chose for you.”
“Well, I’m awake now and I choose no more drugs,” Sin states. “Is there something that I can sign to make sure that doesn’t happen?”
I open my eyes and pull the covers down just enough to peek out into the room. I’m lying on my side, facing Sin’s hospital bed. He’s sitting up, legs dangling off the side with his back toward me. Gavin and Tyson both stand in front of him. My father off to the side.