“Fuck it anyway,” James snaps, his hips starting to move once again, shoving mine into the side of his desk. “I want it rough and messy.”
I yank off my seat belt, open the passenger door, and fall to my knees. Thankful that the car was already on the side of the road.
“Elli?” I hear Sin call out, but I’m already on my knees and vomiting on the gravel at that memory. Just like I was made to do that night. The drugs may have affected my ability to function, but the memories are seared into my brain like the brand Sin gave me on my thigh.
My stomach tightens, and my shoulders begin to shake. I manage to puke again, then I start to dry heave since I haven’t eaten much today.
“Elli …” I see him come up in my peripheral. I hold out my hand for him to stay back and start dry heaving again.
When I have nothing else to give, my head bows, my knees tucked underneath me with my hands on my thighs. I start coughing and fist my hands. I’m a fucking wreck. Why? I’ve lived with this for years. Why can’t I control it now?
“Here, let me help you up.” Hands grab my arms, pulling me to my shaky legs, and I shove him away before pulling the hem of my dress down to cover my pussy where it had ridden up.
“Stop, Easton.” His jaw tightens at his name. “Why?” I ask, the back of my hand running along my mouth.
“Why what?”
“Why now? After all these years? Why are you everywhere all the time?” I ask, unable to escape him. How did he know to be at my house tonight? Was it just a coincidence? No, I don’t believe in those. Especially when it comes to Sin.
He steps toward me, and I take one back. He pauses, shoving his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.
“You’ve been sneaking into my room for two years, but we never had sex. Then I start sleeping with David, and you decide to fuck me?”
“Elli—”
“You tricked me.” I interrupt him, not really caring what his answer to that is. Sin doesn’t need a reason. He just does shit whenever he decides he wants to. Plus, I know about their vow of celibacy. It took me a few days to figure out why he waited so long. “Made me think you were someone else.”
He’s silent.
“How long would you have let that go on?” That, I do want to know.
“How long would you have continued to fuck me, the masked me, and David?” he snaps, avoiding answering my question and asking his own. “For fuck’s sake, Elli. You’d think one dick would be enough.”
I slap him across the face with my good hand. I do it again, but he grabs my wrists before I make contact. I yank it free, but the momentum and heels on the uneven road have me falling, my side skidding across the gravel. He doesn’t laugh at me. Instead, he stares at me with pity. My chest squeezes, making it hard to breathe.
“Come on.” He steps forward to help me up again, and I turn around and jump to my feet, dusting off my hands and fixing my dress again. Fuck, I should have worn jeans tonight and tennis shoes.
“I’ll walk.”
“No,” he growls. “Get your ass in the car.”
I take another step back.
“Elli!” he snaps. “Get your ass in my fucking car. Now. I’m not leaving you here on the side of the road. It’s not safe.”
I give a rough laugh. The part of me that wants a fight rears her fucking head, and I say, “I’m sure I can suck someone’s dick for a ride.”
He reaches out, grabs my arm, and drags me back to the car. Shoving me inside, he slams it shut, and I grab the bottle of champagne I had brought with me when I ran out of my mom’s house. Trying to erase the vomit taste, I take a big swig. I wait until he’s in the driver’s seat with the door shut before I shove mine open and run. Needing the head start.
“Fuck,” he hisses, followed by the sound of his door slamming shut.
I hear his feet pounding the gravel behind me as I run off into the woods. Ducking under branches and jumping over large limbs.
I’m panting, my heart racing, but I don’t look back. I just need to keep going. I’d rather be alone than coddled. He fucked me ruthlessly that night after the Freak Show and then as the masked man. Why is he going soft now? Because he found out I’m a whore? He’s always known that. I’ve heard the whispers about me throughout high school and then Barrington. I just never gave a shit. No one really knew me and what I’ve been through, and those who think they have can go to hell.
I’m hit in the back, causing me to fall to the ground. I knew I wouldn’t get far with my heels on. A cry is ripped from my lips as pain shoots up my shoulder and hip.
My arms are grabbed, and I’m shoved onto my back. I look up to see an angry Sin hovering over me. He straddles my stomach, and I slap at his face. “Get the fuck off me.” But he grabs my arms, shoving them above my head and pinning them to the uneven ground.
Sticks and rocks dig into my back, and I scream as loud as I can with frustration into the woods, trying to buck him off, but it’s no use.
“I love it when you scream for me.” He smiles down at me.
Tears sting my eyes, and I close them tightly, refusing to look at him and show any vulnerability. He’s already seen me weak. I can’t take it anymore.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
SIN
I RELEASE HER wrists and shove her back onto her stomach.
“Get off me,” she growls, her hands now digging into the ground, trying to crawl out from underneath me.
“Why do you do this?” I laugh at her attempt to get away. She’s not going anywhere. I unzip my jeans, pull out my hard dick, and then shove her legs open wide, making her whimper.
Then I reach up, grab her arms and pull them behind her, holding them captive parallel to her back. With my free hand, I slide my cock into her soaked pussy. “Fuck, he did a number on you, didn’t he?”
“Fuck… you,” she chokes out.
I saw the way she looked at me when I showed her pity. So I’ll see how she reacts to the opposite. Letting go of my dick, I reach out and grab her hair. I rip her face up off the ground as my cock starts fucking her cunt. No foreplay. “Tell me, Elli. Did you beg James to fuck you, like you beg me?”
“St-op.” She begins to sob.
I release her forearms and she pulls them from her back to reach out in front of her. I lie down on her back, my weight pinning her down, both of my hands now tangling into her hair, and place my lips by her ear. “Want me to be your daddy?”
She goes wild. Her body thrashing against mine, her legs kicking. Mine spread hers wider to try to control them. Her fingers digging into the ground, while yelling out profanities into the night.
“Be a good girl, baby, and come on my cock. Like you did him for all of those years.” I pull out of her pussy and slam my hips forward.
She’s sobbing uncontrollably now.
“Did he share you?” I growl, doing it again.
The force making us move across the ground. She’s going to have scratch marks on her face from the loose limbs. I know I can feel them scraping through my jeans on my knees. She’s wearing a thin dress. “Did he watch Linc fuck you?” I shouldn’t be jealous. I know that no matter the situation, it wasn’t like she chose to fuck him. But I’ve read her journal for Hamilton’s class, she fantasizes about multiple men fucking her. I would give her the world, but that’s where I draw the line. “Did you come for him too?”