Maisie squawks as I stand up. “Where are you going, Mama?”
“I have to make a quick call,” I say, stepping into the bedroom. “I’ll be right back.” I close the door and dial Mason Brown. It rings several times, and I’m about to hang up when he answers.
“It’s Rachel Beck,” I say. “I have more questions.”
“Okay.”
“I have a three-year-old daughter, so if I were to accept the job, I’d need a place for both of us,” I tell him. “Would that be an issue?”
He inhales and I wait for the frustrated exhale, signaling that I’ve asked for too much. Having kids can be a deal breaker, and not only in business.
“No,” he says, finally. “That would be fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
“What about finding a babysitter or some sort of day-care situation?”
“Shouldn’t be a problem.”
“Okay, before I say yes, there’s something you need to know.” I cross my fingers and hope for the best. “I was fired from Aquamarine because one of our VIP guests wanted me to have sex with him. When I turned him down, he told the CEO of the hotel chain that I was the aggressor. I don’t have any way to prove that I’m telling the truth, but…”
“I believe you.”
“You do?”
“Generally speaking, men are assholes,” Mason says. “So, odds are in your favor that you’re telling the truth. The offer stands.”
“When do you want me to start?” The words spill out of my mouth and I’m stunned. I’m not the impulsive Beck sister. I’m the planner. The pros-and-cons-list-maker. But when I place my hand on my chest, the only sensation I feel is excitement building.
Am I really doing this?
“Could you be here next week?” he asks.
I’m really doing this.
Even though he can’t see me, I smile. “Definitely.”
CHAPTER 4
Sisu
Finnish
“a stoic resilience, determination, and hardiness”
“Absolutely not. Rachel, you can’t be serious,” Mom says, taking last night’s leftover broccoli-and-rice casserole from the oven. When I came out of the bedroom after my call with Mason, she was getting home from work. After I realized I’d forgotten to start dinner, I told her why. “Was ist wrong mit the job you have?”
She’s been living in the United States since before I was born but never completely lost her accent. She speaks fluent English, so when German starts creeping into the conversation, I know she’s freaking out.
“Surely you can see that the Sunway is a huge step backward,” I say.
“Na ja, but there must be a nicer place where you can work. There are so many luxury hotels in South Florida.” Mom scoops some casserole onto Maisie’s plate, then hands me the serving spoon.
“At least a third are owned by Charlie Tennesley’s hotel group,” I explain. “And I’m probably banned from the rest. Blackwell knows everyone.”
“You don’t know that.”
“No. You’re right.”
“See,” Mom says. “Now you can stop with this quatsch about moving to Ohio.”
As she tries to listen while Maisie explains the plot of Star Wars, I steal a glance at my mother. She’s only fifty-seven and still rocks the pale-blond look, even though it comes from a salon these days. She also has luminous skin. Hardly any wrinkles. Anna will probably look exactly like her when she’s middle-aged. I take after Dad, which is not a bad thing—he’s handsome for a deadbeat—but Mom and Anna are another level of beautiful.
“Do you ever think about dating?”
“Where did that come from?” Mom asks.
“Dad’s been gone for…” It’s been so long, I need to do the math. “Nineteen years, and you’ve never talked about any other men. Have you dated anyone since he left?”
“Oma, do you have a boyfriend?” Maisie asks.
Mom rolls her eyes. “Who has time for boyfriends?”
“You would if I took the job in Ohio,” I say. “You could downsize to a condo and not have to worry about repairs or yard work. You could go for drinks after work with your friends. You could sign up for a Tinder account.”
“Halt die Schnauze,” she says, pinching her fingers together like a closing mouth. She rolls her eyes again, but she’s fighting a smile. “Tinder account.”
“Why not? I’m sure a lot of old geezers would swipe right on you.”
She laughs. “I don’t need a man. I have my girls.”
“Mom, I’m taking the job.”
“I think you’re making a mistake.”
“You thought Anna was making a mistake when she went sailing,” I point out. “But look how that turned out.”
“You’re not Anna.”
“What does that mean?”
“You have a history of bad decisions,” she says. “Look at all the terrible boys you dated in high school. Look at B-R-I-A-N. And what about that guy last year who you thought was the One after your first date?”
“Maybe I inherited my decision-making skills from the woman who followed a guy to another country.”
Mom shoots me a murderous look—one I deserve—and points her knife in my direction. “This is not about me.”
“No, this is about my career,” I say. “I stayed on the night shift at Aquamarine when I had the chance to switch to days so I wouldn’t have to sacrifice my time with Maisie. I juggled college, a full-time job, and parenting. I may suck at dating, but I have always made good choices when it comes to my career. Don’t you dare try to conflate them.”
We sit in silence as a space battle plays out in the background on TV. The scrape of silverware across our plates seems amplified.
“I’m sorry for what I said,” I say. “It was disrespectful.”
“But also true,” Mom says. “I was like you when I was young, which is why I’ve always worried more about you than Anna.”
“I really want this job, but I’d rather go with your blessing than without.”
Mom smiles as she uses her knife to push a bit of casserole onto her fork. “I guess I wouldn’t mind getting a smaller place with no yard to worry about. I’ve always hated cleaning up after that tree.”
* * *
The next two days rush past like time-lapse film as I separate Maisie’s and my belongings—keep, donate, trash—and prep the car for a cross-country trek. I sell my bedroom furniture and Maisie’s old crib on Craigslist. I buy winter coats and accessories because my weather app shows temperatures in Ohio ranging from freezing to balmy in the span of a single day. And when I can’t drag my feet any longer, I call Brian and ask him to meet Maisie and me at Lester’s.
“I knew you’d be back.” He aims his dimpled grin at me as he drops into the booth across from us. Maisie is drawing a picture of a fish on the place mat, and my heart gives a nostalgic tug as I watch. My feelings may have changed, but Brian and I had some good times. Together, we made a beautiful child.