I walk up to her and bend over, my hand wrapping into her hair as I steal a quick kiss. I thought she’d push me away and reprimand me, but she gives in and wraps her arms around my neck, kissing me back. She has no idea what she does to me. It’s fucking insane. “We’re at work,” she murmurs against my lips. “Anyone could see.”
“Maybe I want them to.”
Valentina pulls away and throws me a warning look, but the way her eyes twinkle negates her seriousness. “Don’t you dare,” she says, the edges of her lips tipping up into a small smile.
My eyes drop to her empty ring finger, and she holds her ring up between her thumb and index finger. “Did you put this on me, or am I losing my mind? I told you I wouldn’t wear it to the office.”
I smile at her, my heart heavy. “Maybe I just want everyone to know that you’re mine. Can you blame me?”
Her eyes widen, and a gorgeous blush stains her cheeks, making my heart race. She’s so painfully beautiful.
“Valentina,” I murmur. “There’s something I need to tell you.” She raises her brows in question. “Stephen is resigning, and I nominated you as a candidate for COO.”
She jumps up from her chair and closes the distance between us, her hands pressed against my chest and her face so fucking close. Is she daring me to steal another kiss? “Please tell me you aren’t joking, Luca. I won’t forgive you if you are.”
I wrap my hands around her waist and drop my forehead to hers, breathing her in for a moment. I’m like an addict, getting high off her fucking scent like a fucking fool. I pull away a little to look at her and shake my head. “It’s true, baby.”
Her eyes widen, and she rises to her tiptoes, kissing me with no regard for our environment. I wish I could just carry her into my office and fuck her until the unease I feel is put to rest, but I can’t. Whether I like it or not, I have to face the music.
“Valentina,” I murmur against her lips. “You aren’t the only candidate.”
She takes a step away from me when we hear footsteps around the corner, and I sigh, wishing I could just send a company memo informing everyone that she’s mine. I hate sneaking around with her. “What do you mean? Who else could possibly —”
She looks past me, shock and torment flashing through her eyes. “Ben,” she whispers. My stomach twists painfully, every fiber of my being violently responding to his name being on her lips.
He pauses in front of her desk, and I move to stand next to my wife. “He is the other candidate,” I tell her reluctantly.
The regret in his eyes mirrors hers, and it’s clear the history between them left its mark. How do I erase it? How do I erase every single fucking trace of him, when he’s standing right here, looking at my wife like he wants her back?
Chapter Forty-One
Valentina
“Val,” Ben says, his gaze filled with the same regret he showed me last night. “Can we talk?”
Luca tenses beside me, his hand brushing against mine. I look up at him, and he sends me a pleading look that’s so unlike him that I can’t look away. It’s like he’s silently asking me not to go with Ben, to stay right here, with him.
“Val?” Ben repeats, snapping me out of my daze. I turn toward him, surprise rendering me speechless for a moment. I didn’t think I’d ever have to see him again, yet here he is, showing up twice in the span of 24 hours. It feels ominous, almost as though life is trying to remind me what would happen if I allowed myself to give into the feelings Luca is eliciting in me. It feels like a reminder that good things aren’t meant for me.
“What are you doing here?” I ask him, my voice steady. I was shocked and emotional last night, but looking at him right now, I can’t help but feel like he pales in comparison to my husband. He’s inferior in every single way, and not just because he’s a cheating asshole.
“He’s Stephen’s son,” Luca informs me, “and the candidate you’re competing with.”
My eyes widen, and I grit my teeth. Back when we dated, he used to brag about the amazing senior position his father had at some big conglomerate. I’m surprised I never connected the dots. I always knew Stephen had a son who lived overseas, but I should’ve looked into it more.
I smile humorlessly, my stomach in knots. I’ve worked myself to the bone for the mere opportunity to be considered as COO, and he walks in here just like that. Seeing him hurts, but knowing he’ll take more from me than he already has kills me.
“Please, Val. Can we talk? It looks like we’ll be working together for at least a little while. Don’t you think it’d be best to—”
“To what?” I snap. “To reminisce? What for?”
He runs a hand through his hair and looks at me with that same look that used to make my heart race. Longing. Desire. Reverence. It’s what made me give him a chance in the first place. He didn’t care about my background, or the fact that I didn’t fit in amongst the rich students that surrounded him. He was the first person who made me feel seen, and letting him in was my downfall.
“How is your mother?”
A chill runs down my spine as I fight the urge to lose my temper. My pain turns into hatred instantly, and it takes all of me to force a smile.
Luca crosses his arms and shoots Ben a cold stare. “If you want to discuss personal matters, I suggest you do it outside of working hours,” Luca says. His tone is perfectly polite, but I notice the fury he tries to hide. I have no doubt he recognized Ben, and there’s no way I can evade his questions any longer.
I don’t want him to know. It took me years to grow into the person I’ve become, and I don’t want him to find out that it’s all a charade.
“It’s fine,” I tell my husband. Ben is right. We’ll be working together, and we’re competing for the same job. It’s best to get this conversation out of the way. “Please follow me, Ben.”
Luca tenses and wraps his hand around my wrist, his grip tight. He looks into my eyes, his expression unreadable. “Don’t,” he murmurs.
I smile at him reassuringly, and his expression falls as he lets go of me. Luca grits his teeth, and for a moment, I hesitate. Something about his demeanor makes my heart ache. He looks defeated, somehow.
He watches me as I lead Ben to one of the meeting rooms, and I can’t help but look back at him. The way he’s staring at me makes me feel like I’m wronging him somehow. Am I?
I shake my head when I realize that thoughts of Luca are occupying my mind even as I sit down opposite Ben. I always thought I’d be weak and pathetic when I eventually ran into Ben again, but as it turns out, that isn’t true in the slightest. It isn’t heartache I feel. It’s disappointment and shame. Someone like him never should have had the power to hurt me.
“I never forgot about you, Val. I’ve been trying to reach out to you for years. You dropped out without a single word and changed your phone number.”
“Yet you still didn’t get the hint, huh?”
He flinches, and I sigh, annoyed. I’m not sure what I’m most mad about — the fact that he reminds me of the weak girl I used to be, or that I’m going to have to compete with him when he has an unfair advantage. What I do know is that the lingering feelings I have for him aren’t even remotely close to being love. It’s resentment littered with humiliation.