She looks into my eyes, her expression torn. "Ares," she says, "I can't marry you. I can't. How could you possibly even entertain that idea when you’ve been in love with my sister for as long as I can remember? How could you consider making me your wife when the only woman you'll ever want is Hannah?"
I look into her eyes, unsure how to answer her. She's right. Even as I sit here with her, my heart aches at the thought of Hannah and everything I thought we’d have together.
“Raven,” I murmur. “It’s an arranged marriage. So long as there’s affection and respect, we’ll be fine. We’ve been friends for years, haven’t we? What better foundation could we ask for?”
She huffs and looks away. “Ares, I want love. Real love. I want a happy marriage and a faithful husband. Can you give me that?”
I study the contours of her face. Her cute nose and her sharp jaw. She’s refusing to face me because she fears what my answer will be, and I wish things could be different between us. If I could go back in time, would I still make the choices I made?
“Yes,” I tell her. “I can’t guarantee that I’ll make you happy, but I swear to try. As for being a faithful husband? Yes, Raven. I’m surprised you even feel the need to ask. From the moment you become my wife, I swear to be faithful to you.”
She turns to face me, her brows raised. “That’s easy for you to say now that you’re trying to coerce me into this marriage, but what will that look like in practise, Ares? Will you be able to stay away from Hannah?”
I clench my jaw and nod. “Yes, Raven. I would never cheat on my wife. I may be imperfect, but I’m not immoral. I’d never disrespect you or our marriage like that. Hannah made her choice when she ended things between us, and there’s no going back now.”
She looks into my eyes, her gaze provocative. “Do you truly believe you’ll want me someday? Will you ever be able to look at me without thinking of Hannah?” Her gaze travels over my body, pausing on my suit pants for a moment. “Or do you intend to remain celibate throughout our marriage? I sat in your lap, naked, and you still didn’t want me.”
I run a hand through my hair, thoughts of Raven underneath me flashing through my mind. That recurring dream I have would no longer be a forbidden fantasy. “Raven,” I whisper. “You’re one of the most beautiful women alive. I don’t stand a chance at resisting you. Every second of you being in my lap was torture, but I couldn’t… I’m not a cheater, Raven. I would never have touched you then.”
Her expression looks disarmed, surprise flickering through her eyes. I can’t help but smile at her, a hint of embarrassment rushing through me. I never dared to admit to myself how stunning she truly is, how attractive I find her. Raven has always been someone that’s entirely off-limits to me in that way. Until now.
“Ares, if we do this… if it really gets to that point… I need you to know that I expect more than just affection and respect. I expect you to keep an appropriate distance from my sister, regardless of your history. If I make this sacrifice, I won’t allow you to make me regret it. If I marry you, I expect you to treat me as your wife.”
Her fierce expression sets my heart ablaze, and I force myself to stay calm. What is she saying? Does she mean… does she mean she expects us to make this marriage work? I thought what she’d want would be a true marriage of convenience, but could I have been wrong?
“So long as it’s within my power, there’s nothing I won’t give you, Raven. No matter what you ask, it’s yours — and that includes me.”
Her eyes widen slightly, and she nods briefly before tearing her gaze away. “You won’t regret this?” she asks. “You won’t regret sacrificing your happiness for your inheritance? When all is said and done, will you resent me for standing between Hannah and you?”
I cup her face gently and tilt her face toward mine. “No,” I promise her. “I won’t resent you, Raven. This situation is unfortunate for both of us, and I’ll always remember that you’re giving up just as much as I am. I can’t resent you for a choice Hannah made. I won’t do that to you.”
She nods, her expression unreadable. Raven has always been sweet and kind. The woman looking back at me right now is one I don’t recognize, and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Nothing about this conversation went the way I expected it to.
I assumed she’d tell me that even if we end up married, we’d never have more than friendship. I didn’t expect her to ask me for fidelity. Until the words escaped my lips, I didn’t realize I’d be happy to grant it to her, too.
“I hope she changes her mind,” Raven whispers. “All I’ve ever wanted for you is happiness, Ares. I don’t want to be the one who takes it away from you.”
“You won’t,” I promise. “You and I will figure this out, Raven. If we end up getting married, we’ll find our own happiness. It might not be easy, but if this is our destiny, it’ll work itself out.”
The cautious trust I see in her eyes sparks something deep within me. Something that feels an awful lot like hope.
Chapter Eighteen
Raven
Sierra hangs Hannah’s wedding dress on the wardrobe door in the bridal room and smiles at it. “You’re going to look beautiful in this.”
I shake my head and pace my room. “No. She’ll be here any minute now. There’s no way she’ll let Ares marry someone else — especially not me.”
My best friend stares at me, her expression annoyed. “I don’t get it,” she tells me. “You’ve been in love with Ares all your life. Why would you want Hannah to show up?”
I pause and look up at her, my heart sinking. “Because he’s always been hers, Sierra. Even if he marries me, the one he wants will always be Hannah. It’s hard enough to watch him love her the way he does, but legally being able to call him mine while I know that his heart will always belong to her? That would kill me, Sierra. I’d much rather stay friends with him than be the person standing between him and the woman he truly loves. I don’t want to be a replacement, a reminder of Hannah. If we get married now, I’ll never be able to step out of Hannah’s shadow. I’ll always be a cheap replica of her, a standin.”
Sierra shakes her head, her expression thoughtful. “I’ve always found it so odd, you know? It never made sense to me that someone that shines the way you do feels like they’re cast in shadows. She’s like the moon, Raven. Beautiful on a lonely night, but cold and distant. You? You’re the sun. You’re warmth and happiness, and the centre of all that’s good. Similarly, Ares’s world will revolve around you if you give him a chance. I know my brother, babe. If you give this marriage an honest chance, he’ll make you happy. I’ve always said this, and I’ll say it again: there’s always been something between Ares and you. Now you can both finally give into it, and it’ll be the best thing you’ll ever do.”
I run a hand through my hair and shake my head. “Sierra,” I warn. “Today is not the day for your little pep talks and your romantic heart.”