“Hi, Grace. I’m good. How are you?”
“Oh, busy as usual. You have a minute?” she asks, ushering me out into the hall. “I spoke with Dean Woods and he is very interested in speaking with you about heading up the music program here.” She’s giddy with excitement.
“Oh, wow.” I place my hand over my chest in genuine shock. “Heading up the department? I thought it was just about a teaching position?” Suddenly I’m worried about how I would be able to head up a department and be a nanny—the reality is I can’t.
When she first propositioned me about teaching music, it was a part-time position that I could do on the days that Eleanor had class. It would have worked out perfectly. But this, this is a whole new job and I’m not sure I’m ready to walk away from being Eleanor’s nanny quite yet… I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for that.
“Just think about it. It wouldn’t be until next school year anyway so you have time.” She squeezes my hand before ducking back into the classroom to lead the class in their morning song.
I decide to walk over to the coffee shop Hank and I hung out at previously. It’s only a few blocks away and I need to clear my head. Music has always been my passion, my life. I’m twenty-six and I only had less than five years actually teaching. I’m not ready to say goodbye to that career yet. But where does that leave me with Eleanor… and Graham? If I left, would that be the end?
I step inside the coffee shop, my head down as I walk to the counter.
“Margot?” I spin around to see Hank waving at me from a small table in the corner. I wave back, signaling I’ll be over in a minute, then I place my order.
“Hey, what are the odds. You just live here now or…？” I joke, pulling out the chair and taking a seat across from him.
“Nah. I don’t have to be at my first class until eleven a.m. so today is my easy-slash-lazy morning day. How are you? How are things since…？” He trails off and I know he means since the night we hung out. “Sorry I haven’t really been in touch since then. I, uh, I didn’t want to cause any issues.”
“Issues? What do you mean?” I scrunch up my face as they call my name for my coffee. I go grab it and return to the table, taking a long, slow sip.
“Well, your—boss?” he says questioningly. “He kind of threatened me, chased me out. He clearly didn’t want me around you.”
“Wait. I was pretty tipsy, but I wasn’t that drunk. I—” I stumble over my words. I’m confused and a little angry. “He threatened you?”
He shrugs. “Yeah, nothing crazy, just that I had no business letting you get that drunk. I think he thought I was trying to get with you.”
“Oh my God.” I reach across the table. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea what he said.”
“So you two then?”
I nod slowly. “Yeah. Wasn’t supposed to happen, certainly wasn’t planning on it, but yeah, we, uh, slept together.”
He laughs and shakes his head. “Hey, as long as it’s consensual and he’s not being a dick, I’m happy for you.”
“Thanks.” I blush. “I’m not reading into it. It’s just some stupid if not irresponsible fun. Getting involved with your boss isn’t exactly what I thought I’d be doing with my life.” I take another sip of coffee. “How are things with you and Shelly?” I haven’t spoken to him since the conversation I had with her at the house where she confessed her love for him. I knew I told him I’d keep him in the loop, but that’s a confession that needs to come from her.
“Good.” He nods, hiding a smile before he chuckles. “Great. Amazing. Can’t get enough,” he says with a full-blown smile. “We’re official now, a couple.”
“Oh my God!” I squeal. “I’m so happy for you guys; oh, this is amazing.”
We laugh and joke about them getting married and where they’ll live and how many kids they’ll have.
“So what are you going to do next year? You thinking about applying at different schools again?”
I shrug. “Honestly, I don’t know yet. I took the nanny job because I desperately needed a job, but I’ve fallen in love with Eleanor, the little girl. It would break my heart to abandon her. She’s already been through that with the other nanny and her mother dying.”
“You know it’s not abandonment, right? It’s a job, Margot. You’re not her mom.”
The words hurt but they’re true.
“I know. Speaking of, she takes class over at La Crème and they were in talks to offer me a part-time music teaching position that I could do the days she’s in class, but then this morning the teacher I’ve been talking about it with told me they want to offer me a position as head of the music department.”
“Hot damn, Margot. That’s fantastic! And at La Crème.” He whistles. “That’s a resume in and of itself. There’s gotta be so many connections there. They say what the salary would be?”
“No, no specifics yet. It wouldn’t start till next school year and they haven’t even talked with me personally about it, more just to Grace, the pre-K teacher. Her husband is one of the administrators which is why she’s involved. I sent her a copy of my resume.”
He narrows his eyes at me. “But you’ll take it if they offer, right?”
I sigh. “I don’t know, Hank.”
“Margot, come on. You’re not thinking clearly. This thing with the boss is getting your wires crossed.”
I swallow down the lump in my throat. Maybe he’s right.
“I don’t say this to be an asshole, but you’re not their family. You’re a hired member of the staff and they could fire you tomorrow without reason. You need to think about your future, long term. Don’t sacrifice your future just because he wants you right now.”
“I know. I think it’s all just so fresh and new, ya know?”
“The offer or the dick?” He laughs and I reach over to playfully smack him.
“You’re in the dick-sand stage; you’re dickmatized.” We both howl in laughter and it feels good.
I’m in a funk when I leave the coffee shop, my brain no clearer than this morning. I spend the rest of the afternoon running errands, getting in a workout, and reading in the park before picking up Eleanor and heading home.
“Snack tiiiiime,” Eleanor sings as she marches through the front door toward the kitchen, dropping her backpack and shoes by the front door.
I pull open the fridge. “Grapes and cheese?” I ask, and Eleanor nods, sipping from her juice box.
Miss Perry walks into the kitchen. “Afternoon, Eleanor,” she says, ignoring me as usual. Normally I can let it go, but her coldness toward me is growing increasingly arctic at this point and it rubs me the wrong way.
“Good afternoon to you too, Miss Perry.”
I say it louder than necessary, making sure she hears me. She breezes past me, placing a plate and glass into the sink, most likely leftover from Graham’s lunch since he worked from home today.
“Afternoon, Miss Silver,” she quips before pausing, her shoulder brushing against mine. She lowers her voice, then says, “Nice to see you fully clothed.” She looks down her nose at me and I curl my hands into fists at my sides.