“I’m not,” I interrupt and am surprised by the truth of that. I’d worn my anger like a suit of armor, but each piece has melted away when faced with how he’s taken care of me.
Without the anger, there’s only clawing emotions that give my mouth a metallic taste.
“Why aren’t you mad at me?” I whisper as if his anger would make the guilt trying to drown me easier to navigate.
Kalos frowns and tilts his head.
His confusion frustrates me. He should know exactly what I’m talking about.
“I put her in danger,” I say. My hands on my stomach in explanation.
His frown clears, but instead of the expected derision, there’s only understanding.
I don’t want the understanding. “What I did was worse than going down to the caverns alone. With that, I had a plan. I was thinking about keeping her safe—” I break off, struggling to breathe for a moment. “I forgot to think of her at all when I approached you at the fae gate.”
Kalos pulls me into his arms. The move so unexpected that I accept the embrace without thought. The warmth of it has a tear escaping down my cheek. He lifts me and turns until he sits on the couch with me in his lap, an echo of every time he’s held me to provide our daughter heat.
I hiccup, and he presses his forehead to mine.
His voice is soft when he speaks. “Rina, I’m sorry for how I reacted in the caverns. I was wrong and struggling. It was unfair to put the burden of that on you.”
I sniff. All of Maggie’s words about fate, and it’s Kalos’s that finally release the tinge of guilt and failure from that memory.
Kalos continues, “Life is full of risk. It’s easier to realize that now that I’m whole. With the fae gate, I could not expect you to sit on the sidelines while I was in danger. Not when you could possibly do something to remedy it.”
Shock makes its way through the despair that’s coiled around me.
Kalos pulls back to meet my gaze, his determined. “You are my mate. Whether the bond is complete or not. You are courageous and daring. To expect you to be anything else is contrary to your nature. For you to demand of yourself anything else is destructive to who you are.”
The truth of that fights at the miasma of negativity surrounding me, lightening it. Kalos’s arms squeeze around me.
“I am here to protect and care for you.” His talon slides over my cheek, wiping away the tear there. “Will you let me?”
“But I just mess things up,” I whisper.
“You do no such thing,” he rumbles, and there’s finally anger there. “You saved me. You shouldn’t have had to, but you did. You ran from here when needed to protect our daughter. You found strong allies that could keep you safe and close by.”
As he lists out each item, the guilt releases its claws and the truth of my conflict surfaces.
“I’m scared to want this,” I say. I’m scared to love Kalos only to lose him. The close call showed me just how easily we could lose our daughter.
“Ah.” Kalos’s face softens. “Now that is a feeling I know well. Fear is why I pushed you away for so long. It kept me manageable… but broken. I don’t wish that for you.”
He kisses me, and the fire of need flares, attempting to douse my worries. The endless fear that would destroy this life I’ve fought for.
“Allow me to help remind you how brave you are, thief of my heart,” he says against my mouth when the kiss breaks.
My brow scrunches in confusion. Of my heart. Does that mean—
Kalos catches my expression and pulls away, huffing a laugh at himself. “It’s my own fault that you’re surprised. Allow me to clear any misunderstandings.”
He straightens, his claws threading through my hair to tilt my face up to his. The tickle of talon points against my scalp has a sensual shiver chasing the remnants of my pain away.
“Katarina, mate of my heart and by bond, my queen.” He watches his talon tip brush over my lower lip before lifting his gaze to mine, his eyes burning with purpose. “I love you. I want to spend the rest of our lives together whether we succeed in strengthening the bond between us to the point that gives you my lifespan or not.”
I’m stunned by his confession.
“Will you be brave for me?” he asks. “Will you push back and demand from me what you deserve?” He swallows as if nervous. “Will you choose to be my mate?”
Him asking me now, despite us already being connected and me carrying his child, makes my breath catch. But memories threaten this moment.
“You’d choose me?” I ask softly. “Not just your dragon?”
His words in the cavern are a distant pang, but they still cut. I hesitate to put myself in that situation again without knowing.
Kalos winces, his face falling, but he doesn’t look away. “I was wrong to say what I did. I am my dragon. What I said was in conflict with my deepest desires. I… didn’t want to experience the pain of losing you, and somehow leaving before that could happen felt like the easier option.”
And I understand. Perhaps more now than I would have before. He was full of fear. The same fear that is trying to keep me from claiming all the things I’ve wanted.
But I won’t allow it to steal from me.
I’m a thief, an artist, a mother, and… his mate. Nothing will take that from me, especially not fear.
“Yes,” I say, cutting the last hesitating doubt from this moment. This is my place. My home. “I’ll be your mate.”
Kalos hugs me to him with a growl, and I laugh before he cuts it off with a heated kiss. I moan at his taste. Each hour that I’ve missed him comes to life without the chains of guilt and terror holding me back.
I place my hands against the scales on either side of his face, taking every flavor of him that I’ve missed. My hunger as craven as my empty body.
His ardor responds to mine. His cocks hardening under my ass, and his skin heating to my touch.
He breaks the kiss, eyes glinting. “And will you accept all of me as a mate? My mating bite and carry the future babes I sire?”
I snort a disbelieving laugh, dizzy at his words and the desperate kisses. “Getting ahead of yourself, aren’t you? Perhaps we should just focus on the one we’re having first.”
He stands, cradling me in his arms and strides toward the bed. “You underestimate my need for you, my queen. I’ll never have enough of you or filling you with my young. I’ll prove to be a very convincing mate and keep you hungry for me.”
“I already am hungry for you,” I scoff as my face heats. “Whether or not you try to sneak future babies in.”
This conversation is ridiculous and a distraction from the achy need of my lower body, but it’s the promise of a future. A future where Kalos wants me and what we could create together.
He places me on my feet in front of our massive bed, and I gasp as his talons shred the serviceable dress I’m wearing to pieces. It makes me wetter, and I expect him to descend on me in a fiery rush, but he doesn’t. I claw at his robe, but he captures my hands.
His smile is sexy and arrogant. “There will be no sneaking. You’ll beg for me to make your body swell each and every time my heat comes around.”