His face comes down, closer and closer. “Noah,” he murmurs my name, and it’s the most erotic thing I’ve ever heard. His eyelids flutter shut.
I keep mine open. I don’t want to miss a second.
When Ellery’s lips brush mine, the ground rushes up at me because gravity forgets itself. He catches me, and I realize it’s not gravity but my legs that have given out. He smiles against my lips as he pushes me into the wall so that I can’t fall down again. And then his lips begin to nip and suck. He ravages my mouth desperately. Feverishly.
My arms wrap around the back of his neck, and my fingernails start to carve half-moons into his skin, marking him, staking my claim…my claim.
But doing so drags me out of the moment. Shit. I’m not ready for forever. For the permanence of the mate claim. I rip my lips away and bring a hand to them, feeling how plump and sore and deliciously well-kissed they are.
Fuck.
I want this kiss. I want more kisses, but is it smart? Will it mean what he wants it to mean?
Fuck. I don’t know, and for that reason, I push him back.
He lets me, makes no move to convince me to give him what he so clearly wants. I hate that I don’t give in. My body hates me even more, but I’m not going to play around with emotions I don’t understand and am not ready to return.
Heart pounding, I step around him and speed walk for the door. I want him, more than I’ve ever wanted anything, but that scares the shit out of me. I’m not prepared for this. Not prepared at all. I grab the handle and yank it open, fleeing to the safety and sanity of the hall.
A low, pained howl is the last thing I hear before the door to the conference room shuts behind me, locking the mournful sound away. I can’t help feeling like I’ve made the right choice and the wrong one all at the same time, and I have no idea where that leaves me.
Fucked, that’s where. Completely and utterly fucked.
18
NOAH
Karen takes one look at me and announces, “Retail therapy STAT!” and then pretends to shock me with an imaginary defibrillator. Before I can protest, she grabs my hand and pulls me after her through the maze of cubicles and out toward the front of the precinct. “No more hobo chic for you, Poodle, it’s time to show these boys what you’re workin’ with. Let’s go slut you up!”
“Ew, Karen, nobody says shit like that,” I argue, stopping in the middle of the lobby and side-eyeing her.
“Pretty sure I’m someone and I just said it,” she counters matter-of-factly. “And come on, you know you’ve got cake. Let’s make those boys wanna blow your candles out.”
I roll my eyes and fight an annoying smile from taking over my mouth. “Are you in middle school?”
Karen just cackles, a true evil witch cackle that makes me grin as I shake my head. She snatches my hand again and yanks me out of the front doors. As much as I hate shopping, I’m glad to leave the tension with Ellery behind for a bit. This is what I need. Something uncomplicated and silly to wipe away the aftertaste of uncertainty.
“We’ll be a little early for our appointment, but it’s close enough. Trista and Astrid won’t mind.” Karen links her arm with mine.
As we head down the steps, I note that the wind has picked up a little, and while the sun is still warming my shoulders, dark clouds are collecting along the horizon.
“No. Back off. This is girl time,” Karen snaps, suddenly vicious, pulling me closer.
Wondering what could have caused that over-the-top reaction, I glance to my side and spot two familiar figures lurking on the sidewalk. Perth is leaning against a squad car in jeans and a T-shirt, and Ruger’s standing next to him in all black, his tattoos and muscles on full display.
Fuck. My thighs tighten as attraction spreads through me like the flu with its accompanying fever and chills. My body almost feels shaky with need.
Shit. Can they tell?
My eyes lock onto them, and I stare them up and down like I’m starving. Or a perv. Or fuck, I’m not sure. All I know for certain is I want a police calendar with both of them posing shirtless on it. Maybe holding puppies so I can pretend I bought it for the animals. I have to swallow hard as my steps automatically slow when Perth catches sight of me and straightens. He smiles at me, and then so does Ruger.
Individually, they’re both hot. Dual smiles though? Shit. It’s sensory overload in every possible way. Complete logical meltdown. I can’t help it—my belly tightens and a soft smile creases my lips.
“Goddammit, don’t get puppy-eyed on me. That’s fucking gross.” Karen elbows me in the ribs.
“You just wanted me to slut up for them,” I hiss under my breath at her.
The guys’ smiles widen, and I wonder if they’re reading my unruly thoughts or if their hearing is better than I realized.
“Yeah, so you could show them who’s in charge. None of this dewy-eyed damsel crap.” She fakes a gag.
But her words startle me a little because…did I just look like I was fawning?
Shit.
What just happened with Ellery is all the proof needed to know I can’t be pulling that crap with anyone else. Not unless I’m ready to hike that mountain, and I’m not. I don’t have the gear, the experience, or the training… Crap, am I really thinking in hiking terms? Ew.
Why the hell isn’t Gannon the asshole on babysitting duty today? I definitely wouldn’t have this issue with him.
“Hey, ladies, where you headed?” Perth asks, loping up to walk a pace or two behind us down the sidewalk.
Karen gives a long-suffering sigh, pursing her green lips for a moment before she says, “You can only come if you promise to sit and stay like good boys.”
“Karen,” Ruger gently rebukes her.
“Nope. Those are my terms. Take ’em or leave ’em,” she states, walking ahead of the guys and pulling me with her like I’m a pet on a leash.
Scurrying to keep up with the witch, I notice the guys fall into line behind us. I also don’t miss the way Karen smirks at that fact.
Oh, it’s like that, is it? Well, two can play this game.
“So,” I start, my tone goading. “Bucky knows what kind of breakfast muffins you like?”
She stops mid-stride and turns to me, her free hand slowly lifting her sunglasses so she can stare directly into my eyes. “You really want to go there, Poodle?”
Nope.
Not anymore.
Not with that deranged look in her eyes. I most certainly do not.
“I do,” Perth volunteers from behind me. “What’s wrong, Karen? Got fucker’s remorse?”
Oh, shit. She’s going to consume him piece by piece and pick her teeth with his bones.
Karen glowers over her shoulder at Perth, but he’s all happy grins and smiles at having rendered her speechless.
“You are lucky we’re here and that your mate is so desperately in need of my help. I don’t have the bandwidth for you right now, but watch your back, mutt.” She lifts two fingers up to her eyes and then points them back at Perth. “Watch your back.”
Perth playfully snaps his teeth at the gesture, earning him a glare so icy it could correct global warming.
Turning to the building, I stare up at a hand-painted purple sign that says Witch Stitch in a curlicue script. I have no idea how a store that has new age crystals and antiques displayed in the window is going to be the answer to my apparel problems.