The expression in his eyes was bleak. “I think maybe your instincts have been right all these years—we weren’t meant to be together. It would be abnormal.”
She blinked, her body reacting as if he’d punched her square in the solar plexus. She had never said that they shouldn’t be together. It was just that her fate lay on a different path. Her duty was to find peace, and it was one she accepted willingly. “You can’t listen to that guy. I don’t care what he said to you.”
“Oh yeah?” Paxton asked. “He’s not my father.”
She jolted. “Seriously? Huh.” She thought back. She couldn’t remember much except that his mother had been a nice demoness. She wasn’t around for long. “Wouldn’t somebody have known?”
Paxton tilted his head. “I don’t think so. They kept to themselves when they weren’t with separate squads off fighting. So they weren’t close to your parents. They weren’t close to anybody. They just did their jobs and then came home. It’s entirely possible they weren’t mated.”
“But that means your mom was probably mated to somebody else,” she said. “I don’t understand.”
“I know,” Paxton muttered, “but it doesn’t necessarily mean she was mated to somebody else. There have been times, as you know, when unmated immortals have procreated. I guess I could have been one of those babies?”
Elation roared through her. “Well then, that’s good. We hated that guy. It’s good he wasn’t your father.”
Paxton looked away. “Maybe not. When I asked him who my father is, he told me to ask your dad.”
“Huh?”
“He insinuated that Zane Kyllwood is my father,” Paxton said.
Hope’s entire world came crashing down.
Chapter Nineteen Pacing back and forth in her bedroom, Hope could not settle down. Was it possible that Paxton was her half-brother? Sure, they’d been close as kids, and she’d always felt a pull toward him, but she’d kissed him, and she’d felt that kiss to her very toes, if not deeper.
For a second, she let herself indulge in the fantasy that they weren’t related, and this love was the real kind that lasted centuries. The passionate and wild kind. Now that the possibility might be gone, she realized how much she had wanted it.
Pain sliced into her. She loved him.
She pressed her fist to her mouth. None of that mattered—and she had a destiny to follow, anyway. They’d have to forget what had happened and move forward. She’d been inexperienced and Paxton very good at touching her, and that’s all there was to it.
This was insane. She wished her father would hurry up and get back from the battlefield, but his team had gone dark so she couldn’t even reach him.
Time to get on with her fate. It would be smart to meditate before she sought out Drake, but at the moment, she was exhausted. Her body had been beaten up, her heart had taken a hit, and even her brain hurt, so she just slid into bed and let the dreams take her. While she understood that Paxton would sense she’d entered a dreamworld as he always did, at the moment, she didn’t care.
This needed to happen.
For a while, she wandered around, going from world to world, until finally she arrived in one of her favorites from years gone by. The ocean was pink, the sand a light blue, and the trees were made up of wispy wands. Even the sky was an incredible shade of green, darker than any forest. There were no clouds, and the sun was high.
She found a series of rocks that looked like diamonds. This was new. She liked the addition. So she found a flat one and sat, scanning the area for her book. It was located near the forest on a flat sapphire-colored rock, closed and barely vibrating. She couldn’t help herself. She jumped off the rock and ran to it, her fingers just touching the leather-bound cover before it whisked away just out of sight. She looked around and then found the bound book up in a tree, open again, the pages facing her but much too far away to read.
“If you don’t want me to read you, why are you here?” she yelled.
A chuckle came from down the beach. She crossed her arms and turned to watch as Drake strode toward her, wearing his soldier’s uniform, as usual. His hair was getting longer, and amusement danced across his hard face.
“Yelling at books is never wise. What if they yell back?” he asked.
She snorted. “That would be hilarious.”
“I like this place.” He looked around. “The diamond rocks are new. Pretty. Do you like diamonds?”
She lifted a shoulder. “Yeah, I do. I like things that sparkle. Obviously.” She swept a hand toward the pink ocean, trying to center herself in this moment. This was where she was supposed to be, not with Pax.
“You’ve always liked sparkles,” he said. “You need to go for substance, though.”
“Is that you, Drake?” she challenged.
He nodded. “We both know it is.”
Possibly. Her life with Paxton was now in the past. If he was her brother, she’d love him as such, forever. Even if he wasn’t, her path was set. Peace might save millions. She kicked at a loose pebble on the sand and watched it roll away. “I have to know. Did your people attack the Seven stronghold yesterday?”
His jaw hardened. “No, it wasn’t me. I’m not saying my people didn’t do it, but it wasn’t me.”
“It was Ulric?” she asked. Concern filtered through her. Just how much danger was Drake in? She didn’t want him to be harmed.
His stance widened. “I’m getting things under control, but they’re not there yet. Were any of the Seven hurt? I haven’t even heard that much.”
“No,” she said. “They’re all safe. We got them home.”
He wiped his eyes as if he had a raging migraine. They were deep and green with that purple rim, which seemed to glow brighter every time she saw him. “I’m pleased they weren’t hurt.” He glanced down at her, taking her hand in his large one. “You weren’t in battle, were you?”
“Actually, I was,” she said. “Just with one guy, though. One of your soldiers. I had to kill him. I’m sorry.” She winced. Hopefully she hadn’t killed one of his friends.
Drake’s lips twitched. “You killed a Kurjan soldier?”
“I did,” she said. They had to get on the same side in this new war. “I didn’t have a choice. I hope he wasn’t a friend of yours.”
Drake’s brows drew down in a fierce frown. “You should not be in battle. You know that, correct? You are to be a queen.”
Amusement and irritation clashed within her. “I’m not really cut out for the whole queen thing,” she said. “I’m a strategic planner, and sometimes that means being on the battlefield—or at least a couple of miles away.” She could help the Kurjans with that.
“That ends now,” he said. “No more, Hope.”
She didn’t like him dictating to her, but she also didn’t have time to fight. “We can argue about that later. For now, I’m trying to find out—is there any chance for peace?”
“Between us, you and me? Definitely.” Drake leaned in and stole a fast kiss.