“I see,” Rorie murmured.
“I don’t even recognize Luke anymore. We used to be able to talk to each other and joke together, but lately we can’t seem to discuss anything in a rational manner. I’ve tried, Rorie, I really have, but Luke makes everything so difficult.”
“Men have a habit of doing that.”
“I wanted to tell Luke about the night I had dinner with you and Clay and—” She stopped abruptly when she realized what she’d almost said.
“What about it?” Rorie coaxed.
“It’s just that I’d dreaded the evening because I was afraid of being with Clay again. I’m sorry, I don’t want to upset you, Rorie, but I loved Clay for a long time, and getting over him was much harder than I thought it would be. Until the night we were all together.” The words came rushing from her. “I saw Clay with you and I assumed I’d feel all this pain, but instead I felt completely free. You’re both so happy, and I knew, then and there, that I never loved Clay the way you do. True, I adored him for years, but it was more of an adolescent infatuation. Clay was part of my youth. When I understood all these things about myself, all these changes, I felt such hope, such excitement.”
“Oh, Kate, I’m so pleased to hear that.” A shy smile dented Rorie’s cheeks.
“I wanted to explain all this to Luke, but I never got the chance, and now it’s all so much worse. I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to talk to each other again.”
“Of course you will.”
“But he sounded so angry.”
“I’m sure that’s because of his concern for your safety.”
“I can’t talk to him,” Kate repeated sadly. “At least not yet and maybe not ever…”
“Yes, you will, and it’ll be sooner than you think,” Rorie said. “You won’t be able to break off all those years of friendship, and neither will he. He’ll be around in a day or two, ready to apologize for being so harsh. Just you wait and see.”
Kate shook her head. “You make it all seem so easy.”
“Trust me, I know it isn’t. When I think back to the way things went between Clay and me, I empathize all the more with what you’re going through now.”
Kate remembered the dark days following Clay’s visit to California. Neither Rorie nor Clay had ever told her what happened. Clay had gone to San Francisco, intending to bring Rorie back with him, and instead had returned alone.
“Maybe we need to get away from each other for a while,” Kate said. “Maybe if we aren’t in such close proximity, we’ll be able to sort out what we really feel for each other.”
“When are you moving to town?”
“Monday,” Kate said, looking at the cardboard boxes stacked against the opposite wall.
“Do you need help? Skip, Clay and I could easily lend a hand.”
“That would be wonderful.”
The rest of the weekend passed in a blur. Kate didn’t see Luke once. So much for Rorie’s assurances that he’d come by soon to talk everything out. Apparently he meant what he’d said.
Monday morning, when she was about to leave for school, Kate paused before she got into her car, deciding she should at least say goodbye to Luke before she moved out.
Luke wasn’t in the barn, but Bill Schmidt was.
“Good morning, Bill.”
“Howdy, Kate,” he said with a wide grin. “Glad to see there’s no ill effects from your accident.”
“None, thanks. Is Luke around?”
Bill settled his hands in the pockets of his bib overalls. “No. Thought you knew. He left yesterday afternoon for New Mexico to look at some new equipment. He won’t be back until Thursday.”
Ten
Kate was carrying the last of the cardboard boxes to the recycling bins outside the apartment building on Thursday evening when she saw Luke’s pickup turn onto Spruce Street. He came to a grinding halt at the curb, vaulted out of the cab and stood there scowling. His features were contorted, but for the life of her Kate couldn’t understand why he was so irritated. Didn’t he tell her to move? Wasn’t this what he wanted?
She was about to make her presence known, but before she could act, Luke brought his fist down on the bonnet. She heard the sound from where she was standing. It must have smarted because he rubbed his knuckles, gazing intently at the redbrick building. Then, tucking his hands in the back pockets of his jeans, he squared his shoulders and strode toward it. He stopped abruptly, then retreated to his truck. Opening the door, he balanced one foot on the side rail, as if he was about to leap into the cab.