That’s my feeling, too. Rhys disagrees.
I wish you’d found out a different way.
Well, I didn’t. But we’ll face it together. All of us.
How can you be so calm about this?
The alternative is fear and panic. I will not let my son feel those things. I will fight for him, for us, until I no longer can.
Cassian’s throat tightened. We’ll fight for you, too.
I know. Feyre paused again. Rhys had no right to chase you from the city, or to threaten Nesta. He has realized that, and apologized. I want you to come back home. Both of you. Where did you even head off to?
The wilderness. Cassian looked over a shoulder, to where Nesta had been asleep for the past few hours, curled into a tight ball against the wall of rock. I think we’ll stay out here for a few days. We’re going to hike.
Nesta has never been on a hike in her life. I guarantee she will hate it.
Then tell Rhys this is her punishment. Because Rhys, despite apologizing for his threats, would still be furious. Tell him that Nesta and I are going to hike, and she’s going to hate it, but she comes home when I decide she’s ready to come home.
Feyre was quiet for a long minute. He says that he knows he’s supposed to say that’s unnecessary, but to tell you he’s secretly delighted.
Good. I am secretly glad to hear that.
Feyre laughed, and the sound was proof that she might have been hurt, startled by the news, but she was indeed adapting to it. Would not let it make her cower and cry. He didn’t know why he’d expected any less of her.
Feyre said, Please take care of her, Cassian. And yourself.
Cassian glanced to the sleeping female nearly hidden in the shadows of the rock.
I will.
CHAPTER
48
“Get up.”
Nesta tensed, cracking open an eye against the blinding brightness of dawn. Cassian stood above her, a plate of what looked like mushrooms and toast in one hand. Her entire body ached from the hardness of the ground and the chill of the night. She’d barely slept, had mostly lain there, staring at the rock, willing herself to ignore the sounds of the fire, wishing to disappear into nothing.
She eased into a sitting position, and he shoved the plate toward her. “Eat. We’ve got a long day ahead.”
She lifted her eyes, heavy and aching, to his face.
There was nothing warm in it. No challenge or light. Just solid, stone-cold warrior.
Cassian said, “We’ll be hiking from dawn until dusk, only two stops throughout the day. So eat.”
It didn’t matter. Whether she ate or slept or hiked. Any of it.
But Nesta forced herself to eat the food he’d prepared, not speaking as he doused the fire he’d built, focusing on anything but the crack of the logs. Cassian swiftly packed the few cooking supplies, along with the rest of the food, into the canvas bag.
He picked it up, muscles shifting in his forearm with the weight, and walked to her before dumping it between her feet. “I can’t fit a pack that big on my back with the wings. So you’ll be carrying it.”
Had Azriel known that? From the icy, amused gleam in Cassian’s eye, she thought yes.
Nesta finished her food and had nothing to wash her plate with, so she shoved it into the pack.
He said, “You can wash the dishes when we get to the Gerthys River at lunch. It’s a six-hour trek from here.”
She didn’t care. Let him drive her into the ground, let him make her walk and act the servant. It wouldn’t fix anything.
Wouldn’t fix her.
Nesta stood, joints popping and body stiff. She didn’t bother to reweave her braid.
“You can see to your needs around the corner.” He nodded toward the slight curve in the cliff face. “No one is out here.”
She did as he said. When she returned, he only nodded toward the pack. “Pick it up.”
Nesta grunted as she did. It had to be at least a third of her weight. Her back nearly bowed as she hefted it onto her shoulders, but she got it on, wriggling to adjust it. She fiddled with the straps and buckles until it was snug to her spine, the weight balanced across her chest and hips.
Cassian apparently decided that she’d done a decent job. “Let’s go.”
Nesta let him lead the way, and within ten minutes, her breathing became labored, her legs burning as Cassian stalked up the hillside, cutting along the mountain’s face. He didn’t speak to her, and she didn’t speak to him.
The day was as crisp as one could ever wish, the mountains around them vibrant green, the teal rivers so clear that even from high above, she could see the white stones lining their beds.