It was just one week ago when I thought that this was karma. The perfect fiancé in exchange for the worst possible father. Now I’m not so sure.
“Good morning,” I say, standing in the doorway. He looks up and flashes a smile. It seems genuine.
“Good morning,” he says, grabbing a mug. He walks over and hands it to me, kissing the top of my head. “Interesting night last night, huh?”
“Yeah, sorry about that,” I say, scratching at the spot his lips just left. “I think I was kind of in shock, you know. Waking up to the alarm like that and not knowing it was you downstairs.”
“I know, I feel horrible,” he says, leaning against the island. “I must have scared you to death.”
“Yeah,” I say. “A little bit.”
“At least we know the alarm works.”
I try to crack a smile. “Yeah.”
This isn’t the first time I’ve struggled to find the words to say to Daniel, but usually it’s because nothing ever seems good enough to say. Nothing ever seems to convey how deep my feelings are, how absolutely I had fallen for him in such a short amount of time. But now, the reasons are so vastly different, it’s hard to wrap my mind around. It’s hard to believe that this is actually happening. For a split second, my eyes glance over at my purse on the counter, at the bottle of Xanax I know is tucked inside. I think about the pill I took before chasing it with two glasses of wine, the way I had sunken into the couch as if I had been falling through clouds, the memory-like dream I was experiencing just before the alarm screeched to life. I think about college, the last time something like this happened. The last time I was mixing drugs with alcohol in such a reckless manner. I think about the way the police had stared at me then the same way Detective Thomas was staring at me in his office yesterday afternoon—the same way Cooper was staring—silently questioning the validity of my mind, my memories. Me.
I wonder, for a second, if maybe I imagined the necklace. If maybe it wasn’t there at all. If maybe I was just confused, conflating the past with the present, the way I have so many times before.
“You’re mad at me,” Daniel says, walking over to the table and taking a seat. He gestures to the chair across from him, and I follow, dropping my phone on the counter before sitting down and staring at the food below me. It looks good, but I’m not hungry. “And I don’t blame you. I’ve been gone … a lot. I’ve been leaving you here all by yourself in the middle of all of this.”
“In the middle of all what?” I ask, my eyes drilling into the chocolate chips poking out of the browned batter. I pick up my fork and stab one with a single prong, scraping it off with my teeth.
“The wedding,” he says. “Planning everything. And, you know, what’s been on the news.”
“It’s okay. I know you’ve been busy.”
“But not today,” he says, cutting into his breakfast and taking a bite. “Today, I’m not busy. Today, I’m yours. And we’ve got plans.”
“And what exactly are those plans?”
“It’s a surprise. Dress comfortably, we’re going to be outside. Can you be ready in twenty minutes?”
I hesitate for a second, wondering if it’s a good idea. I open my mouth, start to come up with an excuse, when I hear my phone vibrate on the kitchen counter.
“One second,” I say, pushing my chair back, grateful for the excuse to step away, to stop talking. I walk over to the counter and see Cooper’s name on the screen and suddenly our argument last night feels so trivial. Maybe Cooper was right. All this time, maybe he had seen something in Daniel that I couldn’t see. Maybe he’s been trying to warn me.
This relationship you’re in. It doesn’t seem healthy.
I swipe my finger across the screen, ducking into the living room.
“Hey, Coop,” I say, my voice low. “I’m glad you called.”
“Yeah, me, too. Look, Chloe. I’m sorry about last night—”
“It’s fine,” I say. “Really, I’m over it. I overreacted.”
The line is quiet and I can hear his breath. It sounds shaky, like he’s walking fast, his pounding feet on the pavement sending a vibration up his spine.
“Is everything okay?”
“No,” he says. “No, not really.”
“What is it?”
“It’s Mom,” he says at last. “Riverside called me this morning, they said it was urgent.”