“It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me. I won’t be haggled over in secret, smoke-filled rooms. Even dairy cows are negotiated for in the open-air market.”
He choked on a laugh. Or maybe it was a groan. “A dairy cow? That’s hardly flattering to either of us.”
“Given the circumstances, I find it a rather apt comparison.”
“It’s a ridiculous comparison.”
“You’re determined to patronize me,” she said. “To treat me like a child who has no say in her own life. In her own future. I see how it is now.”
Ned sighed. “My dear girl, doesn’t it occur to you that I’m trying to spare you a burden?”
“Why should you? I’ve been shouldering the burdens of my family for as long as I can remember. I shan’t crumple like a leaf to hear that my father has a new scheme for improving the estate.” Her eyes flashed. “Aha! That’s it, isn’t it? He wishes to re-gravel the drive or—”
“It’s not the drive.”
“What, then?”
He ran a hand over his hair. “It’s the plumbing.”
“The plumbing?”
Ned grimaced. “Not the most decorous subject to discuss with a lady.” Indeed, he wondered what the author of The Gentlemen’s Book of Etiquette would have to say about it.
Sophie fell silent for a long moment. A shadow of worry darkened her brow. “I never thought… That is, he’s mentioned bathing rooms and shower baths and the like, but the cost of such a project could never be borne. The gaslight has already nearly forced us into penury. Another improvement on that scale would be the end of us.”
“I’m not a pauper, Sophie.”
“No, but…we don’t even know if we suit each other. Or what might happen after Christmas.” She resumed walking, her pace quickening with every step. “You should leave Derbyshire. You should run far and fast from my family.”
Ned caught up with her easily.
“The plumbing won’t be enough,” she said. “You must realize that. It will no more satisfy him than the gaslight or the platform halt.”
“I thought you approved of progress?”
“Yes. I—” She faltered. “I do approve. I try to, anyway. But this? It’s too much, Ned. When Mama finds out—”
“Is it only the money you object to?”
“Only the money, you say. As if money is a small concern. And even if it weren’t. I’m not worth half the sum.”
“And you accuse me of talking flummery?”
“It’s not flummery. It’s reality. I’m doing you the courtesy of being honest.”
“Permit me to do the same.” Ned caught her by the arm once again, obliging her to stop and look at him. His voice was low and fierce. “You say you know nothing about me. That you don’t know if you like me or not. Or whether we suit or not. But during those two months I courted you in London, I learned to like you very much. I watched you and listened to you. I saw how gracious you are. How kind and sweet and warm. How very much a lady. I don’t need the next eight days to determine how I feel about you. I already know how I feel. I admire you, Sophie. I want you for my own. If I have to modernize your father’s estate into the next millennium, it would be a small price to pay for the privilege of having you.”
Sophie gaze held his, a look of muted astonishment on her face. As if she were stunned by his words and trying very hard not to show it.
And then, just like that, her mouth trembled.
“You’re wrong,” she said. “I do like you. I like when you talk to me—and when you held my hands in the attic. I like that you don’t wish to lay a burden on me.” Her eyes glistened with tears. “I’m being silly and stupid.”
“No,” he said softly. “You’re not.”
She brushed a gloved hand over her cheek. “Only yesterday I was wishing my sister would have some holiday cheer, and here I am like any watering pot. I beg your pardon, Ned.”
His heart turned over. He wanted to take her in his arms. Promise her the world, if only…
But it was too soon. And she was upset. Overwhelmed. He’d had no idea her father’s profligacy had affected her so much. Only a cad would take advantage.
“I want you to do something for me,” he said. “For the next eight days, I want you to let me shoulder this burden.”
She shook her head. “It’s not yours to bear.”