“I know, but the mist still preyed on my fear.” His hand squeezed my hip. “And convinced me otherwise. That was how I woke to find you gone, gasping for air in disbelief.”
Why the mist would lead him to dream of such a thing unsettled me greatly.
“Kieran woke like he was being chased by his own ghosts, roughly at the same time. I think the mist got to both of us in our sleep and that was why we had no idea you’d awakened and left.”
Was that why neither of them seemed to have known we’d all been curled up together earlier in the night?
“What the mist did wasn’t personal, and your susceptibility wasn’t your fault. I should’ve been more aware. I should’ve expected something like that could happen.”
“It sounds like you had your hands full.”
“That’s no excuse. I should’ve controlled the situation better.”
I looked at him again over my shoulder, catching a glimpse of his hard jaw. “Compulsions aside, you can’t control everything.”
“Says who?”
“Says me.”
A smirk appeared. “Well, you have me there. I can’t control you. If I could, I suspect life would be easier, but I don’t even want to try, to be honest. You keep things…intriguing.”
Him and that damn word. Lips curving, I turned back around.
“Princess?”
“What?”
“I saw that. That little grin.” He leaned in, dipping his chin against the side of my neck. “Why are there times you still hide your smiles from me?” His chest rose with a heavy breath as he sat back. “You have a beautiful smile. That and your laugh. And you…you never laughed enough as it was, but when you did…”
I closed my eyes.
“When you did, it was like the moment the damn mist finally cleared. Like when the first rays of sun break through the clouds after a heavy storm,” he said without an ounce of embarrassment. “Your laugh is as beautiful as your smile, and when I told you it was like hearing something familiar? It wasn’t a lie.”
Letting out a shaky breath, I opened my eyes. The gold leaves glistened even more brightly now. “I…I didn’t know that I was still doing that, and it makes me wonder if I did that before you. Smiling and laughter wasn’t becoming of a Maiden, according to the Duke.”
“I want to kill him again.”
“As do I,” I murmured.
We traveled on for a bit, Kieran was still far enough ahead that I couldn’t see much of him. I thought about what I’d seen last night, what I did actually remember. “Do you remember the night I said that creepy rhyme in my sleep?”
“Not something I’m likely to forget,” he replied dryly.
“My father used to say it to me.”
Casteel stiffened behind me. “Come again?”
“Not the last bit—the part about picking the flower and watching it bleed,” I told him. “I still don’t know who said that. It could’ve been the Duke or some twisted part of myself. I don’t know, but the first part—the pretty poppy part. I forgot that. He would say that to me. How could I forget that?”
His arm curled tighter. “I don’t know, but bad memories always seem to have a way of being remembered over the good.”
Wasn’t that the truth?
“Did you dream of your father?”
“I did. I remembered finding him that night. At least, I think I did.” My brow creased. “No, I’m sure that was real. I was looking for him. That’s how my mother found me. He used to call her Cora.” That was another thing I’d forgotten.
“Was that not her name?”
“Her name was Coralena.”
“That’s a beautiful name,” he said, and it was. “What was your father’s?”
“You don’t know that?”
“No. I only knew that your name was Penellaphe at first, and it took a damn long time to discover you had a brother. And that was how I learned your last name,” he told me. “To be honest, I didn’t look into your parents. I didn’t think there was a reason to.”
“If you did, I doubt it would’ve given you any indication that I was…half-Atlantian.” It still sounded strange to say that. “His name was Leopold, but my mother called him Leo or…or Lion.”
“Lion,” he repeated. “I like that. It fits that a Lion would have such a fierce daughter.”
I smiled then, and I only knew that Casteel had seen it because he pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth. It felt like a thank you.