He walked into the room and stood in the empty space beside the bed, in line with me. He looked out at the same view I was studying.
“The Royal Wood used to stretch on forever, it seemed like,” he said into the hush, and it occurred to me that he was talking about the Forbidden Wood. Obviously, that was the favored name on his side of the social divider. “It’s dying, like the rest of this kingdom.”
I nodded. That was certainly true.
After a moment, he gave me some side-eye. “Those garments don’t fit you.”
“Your observational skills are exceptional,” I replied dryly.
“They were made for a man.”
“Hence the extra space where a dick should go, I guess.”
“You’re too thin.”
“Not by choice. I’d eat more if there were more to eat. Would you like me to start pointing out your faults now? How much time do you have?”
His stare beat into the side of my head. After a moment, he said, “Come with me.”
His tone brooked no argument.
But I was out of fucks to give.
“Nah,” I said.
He stepped away, out of view. “Will you make me force you?” he asked from somewhere near the door. I didn’t turn to look.
“Didn’t you try that already? In the wood? But look, if you want another stab wound, I’m in.”
“Big words for a prisoner.”
“Says the guy who protects the land by abducting evil villagers trying to save their families from the curse.”
Silence greeted me. One moment turned into several. He waited so long that I wondered if he’d left.
Curiosity got the better of me. I glanced back.
Empty space.
He’d left! How did a guy that big move so quietly?
I sat there for a moment longer, wondering if I should take this as an opportunity to explore the area by myself. Except suddenly my body turned to fire. My skin felt like it was blistering, sizzling away from my bones. That presence inside thrashed and railed within me, trying to take over. The desperate urge to stand up and obey Nyfain was so strong that I could barely think. Suppressing it was taking all my will, and even that might not be enough.
“Breathe through it,” I coached myself, pulling in a deep breath through my nose and exhaling slowly. “Breathe.”
Pain twisted in my gut the longer I resisted. I ignored it. Shut it off. I’d been hurt plenty—if it wasn’t life-threatening, I could shove it aside.
“Did you say something, doll?” Hadriel poked his head in the doorway, his eyes bloodshot and his face haggard.
“Nope, nothing,” I said through a tight jaw, the unanswered command making me feel like my hair was being torn off and my eyes scraped out. The presence within clawed against my ribcage.
Still, I persisted, suppressing that animal. Handling the pain.
“How do you feel?” I asked. “Amazing?”
He wasn’t a friend—for all I knew, he could be an enemy—but you couldn’t get a greeting like he’d given me last night and feel like a stranger.
“I do not feel amazing, no,” he answered, leaning against the doorframe and rubbing a hand down his face. “My mouth tastes like someone shat in it, and my head is ab-solutely pounding. I’m miserable. And while I am miserable, the master has decided he needs to make matters worse and have me take you to the west garden field. Dealing with him is adding a little more misery to my day. We need to hurry.”
“I’m not going.”
“Yeah, except if you don’t go, I will be the one who’s punished gruesomely. So I will have to beg you to please, please have pity on your poor, humble butler Hadriel and accompany him to the west garden field.”
“Do you always talk about yourself in the third person?”
“Only when it’s a dire situation and I cannot think in a rational manner. This is an emergency, love. My goal of the day is not shitting myself. If he punishes me for not following orders, I will definitely shit myself, and then everyone will make fun of me for, like, five years or something. This is essential. Please. I will do anything.”
He held his stomach as he said all of this with a straight face, and I couldn’t stop chuckling.
“It’s not funny,” he said with a little quirk to his lips. “Do you have any idea how much I drank last night? That mead is not good for one’s stomach, and then I had a greasy breakfast. I only did those things because I thought I would be inside all day today with nothing but a puzzle to do. Now I have to venture out into a high-stress situation away from the privy and a washbasin. I’m not able for this, my darling. These are my professional pants. I don’t want to ruin them. I need you to do this for me.”