“Damn he’s fast.” Anaya, a senior angelic commander, whistled when Illium took off into the winter-blue sky for the second time. “Also, hot. Do you know if he’s single?”
Aodhan stiffened. “You’ll have to ask him.” He was irritated by the question, though why he didn’t know—it wasn’t exactly a surprise. Illium had always had plenty of admirers, mortal and immortal. Kai, for one, was still making eyes at him, though Illium had been too busy to respond.
“Maybe I will.” A dazzling smile from the smart, funny woman who was just Illium’s type. “Who knows? Could be he’s feeling lonely out here far from his people.”
He’s not far from his people, Aodhan thought mutinously as she walked away, I’m here. Though he tried to put the small byplay out of his mind, he kept returning to gnaw on it. He wanted to slap himself for it, but he couldn’t stop and he didn’t understand why.
No romantic relationship, not even Illium’s love for Kaia, had ever impacted his friendship with Aodhan, so it wasn’t as if Aodhan was afraid of that. Or maybe he was. After all, they’d been on rocky ground this past year—and a lot of it was Aodhan’s fault. He knew it, admitted it.
He had no right to be in any way irritated by any romantic entanglement in which Illium chose to indulge.
That thought was firmly at the forefront of his mind when Illium returned from his latest sortie. “All clear,” his friend told him, before bending over with his hands on his thighs, his chest heaving and sweat dripping down his temples.
“You flew at maximum capacity.” Elsewise, Illium could leave everyone in his dust without effort.
“Yeah.” It came out a puff of air. “Figured the faster you had the info, the less chance of other fog hellholes opening up before the caravan gets past.” All of that spoken in short, staccato bursts.
Aodhan found himself touching the back of his hand to Illium’s cheek. “Thank you.”
A quick grin that melted the tension in Aodhan’s spine. What was he worried about? Him and Blue? Fighting or annoying one another or eating angry stew together, the two of them were stuck like glue.
But there was one thing he had to say, one apology he had to make. “Keir told me something when I first began to speak to him about Sachieri and Bathar.” He’d already mentioned his talks with the healer to Illium.
“Yeah?” Illium’s breathing was yet unsteady, but he’d straightened up, his hands braced against his hips.
“He warned me that I might one day strike out at the ones I love the most.” He held the aged gold of eyes that, to him, meant home, meant safety. “He said that it would be an unconscious thing, but that I’d choose them as targets because I knew they were safe, that they wouldn’t forswear me even when I was an ass.”
“Keir doesn’t use words like ass,” Illium said, but there was a slight tremor in his voice that had nothing to do with his breathlessness.
Aodhan ran the back of his hand over Illium’s cheek once more, ignored the small attempt at levity. “I forgot what he told me even as I struck out at the person who means more to me than anyone else.” Illium was the sun in his system, the person without whom nothing else functioned quite right. “I took advantage of your loyalty and generosity, and I’m sorry for that.”
“Shut up.” Illium swallowed hard. “I’m glad you felt safe enough with me to be utterly insufferable.”
“I’m still sorry.” He waited until Illium met his gaze. “Not for what I want or how I’ve changed, but for how I’ve hurt you by my actions—and by my silence.” He hadn’t used it as a weapon, but that didn’t alter that it had drawn blood. “I will never again do that.” A promise that was a vow. “I will never again lock you out.”
Blinking hard, Illium glanced away.
Aodhan moved close enough to take Illium’s chin in his hand, tug gently until his best friend in the world would look at him again. The gold shone with a sheen of wet, the same emotion rocks in Aodhan’s throat. “Always, Blue,” he said, his voice husky. “Me and you? We’re always.”
Their breaths mingled, the sounds of the world fading away, until it was just Aodhan and Illium, Adi and Blue, Sparkle and Bluebell. Then Illium gave a lopsided smile and their entire world righted itself.
Nothing more needed to be said. Not here.
Leaving Illium to recover, Aodhan told the rest of the team to prepare to shift toward the secondary alternate route. It only took them an hour to move out—quick when you considered the number of people and vehicles involved. Aodhan didn’t see Illium after that except at a distance, his friend doing his job as an advance scout, sleek and fast.