“To rent a place, we’d first need money. We don’t have any.” I can’t help the look I slide Kellyn’s way.
Before he can speak, Temra says, “We’ll sell one of your weapons. The spear. None of us has the skills to use it. This way it’ll be put to good use.”
I want to argue. I feel a shiver go down my spine just at the thought of living in the capital. But Temra’s logic is sound. There’s no way for me to talk around it.
“What is happening?” Kellyn asks from behind us all. “You think I’m just going to take your money and run? I’ll get us supplies. I’ll get you to the next city. We’ll be fine. Besides, I’m not going anywhere until I have that magicked longsword. Where the bladesmith goes, I go.”
The three of us lower our heads together once more. “I don’t like it,” I say. Specifically, I don’t like him.
“Me neither,” Petrik agrees.
“Doesn’t change the fact that we need him,” Temra says.
“You’re an excellent fighter,” Petrik says. “We’ll get by.”
“As excited as I am for you to finally acknowledge something about me, I’m not enough fighting power, and you both know it. What happens if we run into more wolves? Or bandits? Or our pursuers?”
She’s right.
I hate that she’s right.
“Fine,” I say. “You tell him he can come.”
Now that the immediate threat has passed, I feel myself close to collapsing. Before I can break down in front of everyone, I excuse myself. I count sixty steps before I stop and slump to the wet ground, not caring that my skirts soak up the mud. I’m still mostly damp from the lake anyway.
I almost lost my sister.
Forever.
Everything else may be gone. The money. The horse. The forge. My home.
But it all pales in comparison to the fact that I almost lost the most important thing to me in the world.
I let the tears fall. Allow myself the comfort of crying. I lean my back against a tree and wrap my arms around myself.
How could it all go so wrong? How could I let this happen to us?
My thoughts grow darker and darker as the sun fades, until I hear Temra calling for me.
“Over here,” I say. My tears have long since dried. She crouches down beside me, and I hug her to me. “I thought I lost you for a moment.”
“I’m all right. You came for me.”
“I’ll always come for you.”
She runs a hand over my hair. “Even when I’m awful to you.”
“I forgive you.”
“Ziva, what I said, I didn’t mean any of it. I was just so relieved to know our family and to feel like there might be a new place, maybe even a better one for us. I just wanted to feel safe, and you were taking that away. You were pointing out the facts, and I didn’t want to listen. I put you in danger by not listening. I swear to you that I will never do that again. You’re my sister, the only family I need. I won’t forget it a second time.”
“Thank you for saying that.”
Now she’s the one hugging me, offering me comfort. I feel guilty taking it from my little sister. I’m supposed to be the one protecting and comforting her. I nearly got her killed twice now. I wonder again if she wouldn’t be better off separated from me.
“I hate that mercenary,” I say after a while. “He’s dishonorable. Are you sure we can’t send him on his way?”
She doesn’t grant my question any weight by responding.
I bury my face against her shoulder. I have to scoot my body to the side to manage it with my superior height. “He slowed us down, Temra. He actually started talking about money while you were in danger. What kind of person does that?”
“He is what he is. We shouldn’t expect anything more from him. The one thing we can rely on is that he will always do what we need of him if he wants something from us. That should give us some relief.”
“It doesn’t.” The embarrassing part is that I almost thought we were friends. Someone I could finally tolerate having around who wasn’t my sister. I’ve never had that before.
And then he did this.
We may need the mercenary around for our survival, but I give myself full permission to hate him every step of the journey.
“Is it possible,” Temra asks, “that you’re overreacting?”
“How could I ever overreact where your safety is concerned?”
“I just want to make sure you’re not looking for excuses to push him away.”