But her husband had wanted to show off to his lover that he was the owner of a building. “If you need more money for the construction, let me know and I’ll get you whatever you need,” he had boasted to her. The woman realized that it had never crossed her husband’s mind that the money he would use to get whatever she needed was borrowed, nor the fact that the building he wanted to show off had been bought through years of his wife’s back-breaking labor.
The child was good at playing by herself; this time, the woman did not cry as she watched her. The child kept locking and unlocking the box—clunk, clunk, clunk—as the woman watched in silence, lost in her own thoughts.
The child, still playing with the box, looked up at her and smiled. The woman tried to smile back, but found that she could not.
Saying he was going for a hike, her husband left the house late one evening.
A heavy rain began to fall.
He never returned from the mountain.
There was a traffic accident on the nearby highway. A car skidded on the road and crashed into a guardrail. The woman driver had been taken to the ER but was comatose. The man who had been sitting in the passenger seat had flown out the car on impact and was found on a slope. His neck broken, he had died instantly.
After the death of the husband, the child followed the woman around all day, even while the woman was on the phone with her mother.
—Are you sleeping well? And eating?
“I never miss a meal. And I’m sleeping well.” The woman gestured to the child to be careful as the little one ran across the living room floor, giggling all the way.
—And how’s the building, are you OK in there? Getting some rent money?
“Yes, a boutique moved into the first floor, and the publisher on the second floor still pays rent every month.”
—Do you ever go outside? I hope you’re not holed up in there all day.
The child leaped into the woman’s embrace. The woman stroked the child’s hair.
She had just begun to notice that the contours of the child seemed clearer.
“Well …” Her voice briefly trailed off. “It’s pretty comfortable in here.”
—But you’ve got to get out and get some fresh air now and then. You’re still young and childless, and it’s not like widows need to hide away from the world anymore. Go travel, meet some people …
The child reached for her phone to try and take it. The woman shook her head. “No, Mom is on the phone right now.”
—What? I couldn’t hear you just now.
She spoke into the phone. “It’s nothing, Mom.”
—Is there someone in the house with you?
“No, who else would be here?”
The woman’s mother sighed.
—I can’t bear the thought of you being alone in there all the time. And you refuse to let me come and take care of you for a while—
“Mom.” The woman cut her off before she started her lamentations again. “I’m comfortable the way I am now. I just need more time, some rest, and I’ll have my wits about me again. I’ll take care of everything then.”
—Your mother-in-law isn’t bothering you, is she?
“No, Mom. It’s nothing like that.” She had to get her mother off the phone. “Look, I’m boiling some laundry right now and I need to get it off the fire. I’ll call you soon.”
—All right. Be careful. Don’t do too many chores, and get out of the house every now and then.
“Bye.”
She hung up the phone.
Turning to the child, she said, “Well, it’s just you and me now.”
The child stopped running around and faced her. She smiled.
“Would you like to go on a trip with your mom?” the woman asked. “You’ve never been outside this building, right? Do you want to go outside, just the two of us? Shall we go somewhere far, far away?”
The child looked at the woman’s face with an intense expression. Wordlessly and slowly, she shook her head.
The woman already knew. The child had always been here in this building. And she would never be able to leave.
As long as she was with the child, she would never leave this building, either.
And that wouldn’t be so bad, she thought.
“Come here.”
The woman opened her arms wide. The child ran in for a hug. The woman almost fell backwards from the impact.
At first, the child had only been a faint shadow in the basement.
Now she had solid form, with real warmth and a soft texture to her skin. She was bigger, weightier, and clearer.