‘Ha! That’s a good one. He didn’t have to have kids. We didn’t ask to be born. Plenty of people get pregnant by accident . . . I did!’ Lily says.
‘Well, I didn’t,’ Nancy replies, and the room is even quieter than before. ‘I knew your father was going to choose music over me, even when we were students. I got pregnant on purpose so that he’d marry me. So that he’d have to stay.’
My sisters and I try to process this latest bombshell, but it’s all a bit much to take in: finding Nana dead in the kitchen earlier, now Dad in the music room. It’s like a messed-up-family edition of Cluedo. But this isn’t a game; two people have died here tonight. I think part of me always suspected that Nancy deliberately got pregnant and tricked Dad into marrying her, but hearing her say it out loud is surreal. Half of me hates her for it, while the other half knows I never would have been born if she hadn’t.
‘So he didn’t really want any of us?’ asks Rose. ‘That explains a lot.’
‘He loved all of you in his own way,’ Nancy says. ‘I just can’t believe he would do this.’
‘Maybe he didn’t,’ Conor says.
Nancy stares at him. ‘The door was locked, there was nobody else in the room . . .’
‘The door could have been locked from the outside,’ he replies calmly. ‘Either way, the police will have to be called now.’
Everyone looks scared for the first time, and I can’t help wondering why it took so long.
‘Conor is right,’ says Rose, always in control of her emotions. ‘We will have to involve the police when we can. It’s only five hours until low tide now. We’ll leave together in the morning and call for help. In the meantime, maybe we could all just try to be kind to each other? We should go back to the lounge. Trixie is on her own in there,’ she adds, taking charge like before. ‘After everything that has happened here tonight, I’d feel a lot better knowing that we were all safe and together in one room.’
My eldest sister often took charge of situations when we were children, and the fact that she is doing so now feels like a relief. I pretend not to notice, but I see her tap Conor on the arm as we are all leaving the music room, and feel a stab of inexplicable hurt when he hangs back. They don’t speak until they think the rest of us have returned to the lounge, but unknown to them, I’m waiting quietly out in the hall. I have to strain to listen, and cover my mouth with my hand to stop myself making a sound when I hear what they say.
‘You are right, we do need to call the police,’ Rose whispers.
‘Why do you agree with me all of a sudden?’ Conor asks.
‘No animal I know shares the human capacity for self-harm, but this wasn’t suicide.’
‘Why do you say that?’
‘Sadly, I often see poisoned pets in my line of work. People can be monsters. It’s one of the many reasons why I prefer animals. Dad is the only person in the family who drinks whisky. When I smelled his glass, it didn’t just smell of alcohol. My father was poisoned. It was murder, I’m sure of it.’
I don’t say a word, but I do wonder why Rose would choose to confide in Conor and not the rest of us. And why neither of them wanted to share that information with me. The shadow of a thought lingers in my mind, and I can’t seem to shake it. Not that I’ll ever say anything to either of them about it. I only self-destruct in private.
Back in the lounge, Trixie has fallen asleep on the large window seat at the far end of the room. It’s one of my niece’s favourite spots in the house, and she can often be found curled up there with a blanket and a book. Poppins the dog is stretched out on the floor beside her, gently snoring. It breaks my heart that such a kind child could have been born into such a cruel family. I’m glad she’s sleeping now. Hopefully she’ll stay that way until we can all leave.
I think that Rose is looking at her too, but it turns out she was looking at the dog.
‘Poppins is taking all of this very well, poor old girl,’ she says, to nobody in particular.
On hearing her name, Poppins comes to sit next to Rose.
‘That’s a good point. What will happen to the dog now that Nana is dead?’ Lily asks.
‘I’ll take her with me,’ Rose replies without hesitation.
‘You said that as if you’d already thought it through.’
We sit in silence for a while. I don’t think any of us know what to say. I look at each of their faces and see a mix of fear, shock and sorrow on every one. Rose strokes the dog and stares at the flames in the fire, with an expression I’ve never seen her face wear. Conor stares at Rose. Despite throwing another log on the fire, Nancy can’t seem to stop shivering. Lily goes to sit next to her and they hold hands. They have one of those mother–daughter relationships where they squabble all the time but never stay cross with each other for long. It’s another thing that I’ve always been jealous of.